


Make Me Yours

by disgruntledwing



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Bottom Damian Wayne, Consensual Underage Sex, Dirty Talk, Forbidden Love, I am really not kidding about that, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Jealousy, Literally everyone loves Dick Grayson, Love Confessions, M/M, Minor Dick Grayson/Bruce Wayne, One sided Jason Todd/Dick Grayson, One sided Tim Drake/Dick Grayson - Freeform, Oral Sex, Pining, Possessive Behavior, Possessive Sex, Rape Fantasy, Requited Unrequited Love, Rough Sex, Sex, Top Dick Grayson, Underage Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:49:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 10
Words: 61,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25410415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/disgruntledwing/pseuds/disgruntledwing
Summary: Damian struggles to control his overwhelming love for Dick. It doesn't go very well.
Relationships: Dick Grayson/Damian Wayne
Comments: 99
Kudos: 233





	1. Chapter 1

Socialites filtered throughout the vast expanse of the room, filtering between social groups, swinging from arm to the next arm like monkeys chasing the shiniest coin. Diamonds glittered everywhere, sharp tuxes offered harsh lines to the modelesque curves mirroring them. Wayne galas were always extraordinary, anyone who was somebody glided across these floors, gravitating to the ever charming billionaire and playboy Bruce Wayne. 

Damian always felt a dissonance watching his father enchant the elites, wear his golden smile, and laugh heartily to whatever shitty joke he’d been subject to. The famous Wayne charm seemed to do more than just skip the next generation, it felt like.  _ Rather,  _ it seemed like it did a lot fucking more than just skip the generation. It seemed like Damian’s imitations of his father were worse than his usual arrogant aloof self. The elites he would try to suffer would balk at his too toothy grimace and he would feel confused until he turned and caught his reflection in a passing champagne bottle. Regrettably, he looked caught between predatory and “I’m passing a kidney stone currently.” Well  _ whatever _ , charm clearly wasn’t hereditary, seeing as Dick Grayson took Bruce’s charm and seemed to enhance it - breathe life into whatever room he entered, for he didn’t just entertain the world, but he tethered it to him, so anyone around would glide to him and bask in his presence. Damian knew Dick didn’t always revel in the spotlight, but he could’ve fooled him. The idiot  _ seemed _ to swell in the attention everyone practically begged him to take. A rock could’ve held more charm than himself in comparison, Damian concluded. Not to mention how unfairly attractive the man was, for fuck’s sake, Damian brooded. His mind raced at the mere mention of the adonis figure, whose muscular legs strained in whatever pants he blessed to hug his ass, biceps that flexed with seemingly no movement, back muscles that rippled needlessly, hands that sharpened into long, large digits, and his obscenely attractive face with his dazzling smile and perfect stupid hair and sharp jaw and sky blue eyes that surely twi - 

“Damian! Oh good, I’ve been looking for you. Want to - well you look ill. And your teeth are grinding! Was it Tim or the general populace?” Dick grinned. 

Frowning for having startled too easily, but then again, it seemed he did whatever so embarrassingly easy around Dick these days, Damian sidestepped to avoid having Dick plastered all over his back. Distance with Dick was imperative to his defense, and well, he already was sporting a half hard boner so really running for the hills might be the truly best option. 

“ _ Tt _ , hello to you too, Grayson. I’m surprised you took time out of your sleazy rounds with these braindead purses. Has your ego been stroked enough tonight?” 

Damian folded his arms and took one more little sidestep back, bracing his stance and trying to look unruffled. Despite trying to look pointedly away from Dick, as always, he gravitated right back towards the sharply dressed man. He had grown a lot in the last year, and was now coming up to Dick’s nose. Where Dick was long and lean, Damian felt bulky and barreling. He knew he wouldn’t fill out quite as much as Father, maybe a tad less, instead taking slightly after the sinewy frame of his mother, but he would still be pretty formidable. Dick was a little shorter than Father, and far leaner. Damian knew he would in fact reach Dick’s height, not that it dissuaded any of Dick’s teasing. Much to Damian’s discomfort, he had been acquiring a truly nefarious amount of attention since he started to grow into his parents’ best traits, with his father’s jaw and hair and his mother’s eyes and delicate nose. He knew objectively he was attractive, genetics do not fail like that, and the public eye seemed especially doting on his brown skin. But it wasn’t like he cared what anyone thought about what he looked like - well, everyone but one. 

“You wound me, little prince,” Dick laughed. “I’m just being nice. You on the other hand, however, look like a little storm cloud thundering warnings to anyone coming close. Where’s your Wayne charm?”

“Nonexistent, seeing as unnecessary and unseemly are battling it out for the title. Besides, you’re not just being  _ nice _ , you’ve allowed harlots to feel you up and indecent eyes to rake over you.  _ That _ , if I am not mistaken, is flirting, and I would think better of you but I cannot say I am surprised.”

Dick’s face twisted into a half grin, and he seemed to materialize right next to Damian’s face. “You’d only know that if you were watching me all night. Don’t tell me the arrogant brat was jealous of my attention…”

Damian curled his lip and held his head high, “Don’t  _ project _ , Grayson, just because I do not fawn over you or babble for your attention like these fools, does not mean you need to be insufferable,” Damian hissed and tried to not panic at the thought that Dick noticed his secret longing glances. 

Quick as he invaded Damian’s space, Dick stepped out of it, and while Damian allowed himself to relax a little bit, his heart continued hammering. He was so… so  _ stupid _ . The smallest of interactions and Dick could leave him almost breathless and sweat gathering under his arms. This attraction, no, obsession, no -  _ love _ , he felt resigned to admit to himself now, for Dick was becoming truly unbearable. But Damian couldn’t remember exactly when it started, only that it became almost overwhelming ever since he had started puberty. He knew this love he had harbored had blossomed during dark nights in Dick’s shadow as Batman, with his unending kindness and willingness to not only accept Damian but endure Damian when no one else had. Damian did not suffer fools, but apparently Dick had, because now Damian’s heart was carved simply only for Dick, but then again, he couldn’t lie and say that he was surprised. It had always been Dick, and this deep ache Damian felt in his bones at the thought of Dick - it would always be Dick. He both reveled in that knowledge and died a little every time he thought about it. Damian just hadn’t fathomed how fucking annoying it would be.

Dick’s gaze softened, and he raked a hand through his hair. “I’m just teasing, babybat. Maybe I am projecting a little. I know I haven’t been in Gotham enough recently, and I did miss you. Leave it to the lame older brother to suffocate you in love. I’ll give you a little space, but maybe we can catch up soon? It’s been forever.” Turning away, Dick’s hand grabbed Damian’s and squeezed two beats before letting go. 

“I- yes. Your absence has been noted by m- Father and Alfred. That would be… adequate. Thanks. For them, I mean.” Damian’s voice cracked and he snapped his mouth shut before embarrassing himself more. He felt the back of his neck blaze and he had to focus not to keep Dick’s hand locked in his own. Just as quick as he had left, the gaudy masses swallowed Dick up again, welcoming him back and pressing in on all sides. Damian heard Dick’s laugh drift over as women batted their eyes at him and men pointed hooded eyes at Dick’s retreating figure. 

Certainly the interaction could have gone better for Damian’s unfortunate erection, but he adjusted himself and tried to breathe deeply and find some semblance of peace to quiet the obvious wreckage Dick had on Damian’s body.  _ Focus, breathe, and get yourself together for fuck’s sake.  _ Jade eyes snapped open and took in his immediate surroundings again, scanning around until he saw cerulean eyes considering him suspiciously. Damian immediately felt his lip curl and his brow furrow, he not only had the misfortune to be rendered to a lovesick horny mess in a matter of moments, but then he had to have Drake watching him too. The unfairness of it all. 

Dick would have liked Damian to walk away or behave, but Dick wasn’t there and Damian had too much energy not to counter Drake’s invasion of privacy. Stalking towards Drake, Damian felt his body easing into the easy passion of rage and arrogance. How easy it was to slip back into such armor. 

“ _ Drake, _ ” Damian hissed, “are you so unbearably inept at minding your own business or do you just get off on imagining Grayson would pay attention to you instead?” Damian almost winced internally, that was a little far even for him. He was also quite aware that he was as bumbling in the conversation with Dick as he was vulnerable, but Damian didn’t really care. The idea of being  _ vulnerable _ while Drake spectated was less appealing than eating his own foot, and Damian was hoping Drake actually didn’t get to see most of the conversation. Deflect, deflect, deflect, and go for the jugular. His mother did teach him well, after all. 

Tim’s eyes narrowed, and he placed his champagne glass down on a nearby table. It would do little good to showcase excellent fodder for the public eye to judge the Wayne sons even more. They were on the outskirts of the gala, near the infinite tables and seats lining the perimeter of the room. Damian advanced towards Tim, corralling him near the corner of the room where no socialites flocked.

“That was embarrassingly transparent, Damian, even for you. So maybe I was watching Dick. What’s it to you? The only thing I saw was Dick working a little brat charity because he is too nice. You’re lucky Dick is blind, because you are so obvious it is painful.” 

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? I am not obvious because I am not  _ anything _ . Why were you watching him? I’m sorry Grayson doesn’t want to hang around your feeble, grating self, but maybe it is because you’re just not good enough.”

“As if you are? Please. You really don’t think I can tell what just happened over there? As if people can’t tell already? You don’t see  _ me _ making a fool out of myself like that.” 

Damian practically snarled, shoulders tensing before he let Drake’s words sink into him.  _ Did he know? How could he know? What the hell did he mean, like he wouldn’t do that?  _ Damian’s mind raced. Rarely did Drake do more than just antagonize Damian, but this time it seemed as if he had shown his cards a little too much. Drake’s face looked hard, and his eyes seemed to bore holes into Damian’s head. Damian’s mind screeched to a halt.  _ Oh fuck. Oh shit. Fuck. He was watching him, too. Does that mean…? He favors Dick, too? Does he know I do? He knows I do. Jesus Christ, why didn’t I keep my big fucking mouth shut?  _ Damian staggered back, trying to regain some semblance of control he had with easy insults. No one was supposed to know, absolutely no one, let alone Tim fucking Drake. This was easily the most sensitive part of Damian he had, and he couldn’t even keep that secret. 

“You really are stupid. Did you think you were the first? The only one?”

Damian faltered. He knew he would not be alone in his affections, it was Dick fucking Grayson for fuck’s sake, but  _ Tim _ ? Loathe as he was to admit it, Drake always had a poker face like Father. Damian knew very little of what actually went on in Drake’s mind. 

Drake sneered. “It’s part of the Robin mantle, or is that another part you’re going to warp because you just don’t deserve it?” 

_ Part of the Robin mantle? Like, what, Red Hood too? That vulgar, volatile outcast?  _ Damian felt like his head was gonna split. Revulsion rolled through Damian, and he reeled back as if he had been slapped. Revulsion that these utter fools had even disgraced Dick by thinking about him in such a way, when Dick deserved everything. Not these sad excuses for Robins that his Father had taken pity on. Jealousy, that such imbeciles could look at Dick with desire when Dick was already far too kind to them. No matter, Damian figured. This did not change anything, but now he would try to be more aware of their interactions. 

“Cease your blathering, I’ve heard enough. I have no idea what you are implying, but you have no business with Grayson. You’re daft for suggesting such a thing, clearly you are confused or have simply had too much to drink. You disgust me.” Damian locked eyes with Drake, and he knew in that moment, how easily Drake had seen through him. How Drake knew right now, how badly Damian was lying and how stunned he truly left Damian. Drake scowled, and opened his mouth, but before he could get anything out, Damian whirled around and stalked towards the hall past the tables. Heart pounding and jaw tense, Damian turned the corner into the dark hallway and his back slumped against the wall. He looked up at the ceiling that seemed to go on forever. The curtains of a nearby window billowed with the occasional gust of wind, and the cool Gotham relaxed Damian in a way nothing else ever would. The end of the damn night couldn’t come fast enough Damian thought, and he knew he couldn’t go back into the gala. No, tonight when his father’s ever calculating eyes scanned the crowd to keep a Wayne headcount, he would not find Damian. Damian had done his part (partly at least), and he was going on patrol early. He had far too much adrenaline pumping in his system for him not to pummel some criminals, and Damian couldn’t find he cared much about his Father’s imminent wrath. 

Just before he was about to dart down the hall and make his way to the Cave, his phone pinged. Very few people texted him, and even fewer did he like, so he pulled his phone out of his dress pants pocket with a frown. 

**Dick: Hey, little prince! Saw you slipped away, lucky! Let’s train together tomorrow night, ok?**

**Damian: Acceptable, see you then.**

**Dick: Ok! You looked good tonight, can’t believe how much you’ve grown! C u thennn :)**

Damian couldn’t keep the heat rushing to his face, or the warm wave of pleasure that rocked through him from Dick’s praise. He answered with a simple  **“Tt u2”** and half hoped Dick could read Damian’s mind and see the weight that was behind such small words. Immediately Damian’s mind continued his appraisal for the vision that was Dick, and his heart swelled at the thought that Dick thought  _ he _ looked good at all. With a small smile on his face, and the decision to ponder Drake’s words later, Damian moved for the Cave and tried not to think about how terribly excited he was to see Dick the next night. 

\---

The next day proved to be rather uneventful in Damian’s mind, despite it having several events for him to tend to. But it  _ seemed  _ uneventful and dragging until the night when Damian would get to see Dick again. Father had been very cross, suspending his patrol duties for a couple days. Damian couldn’t lie and say that hadn’t really pissed him off, but could at least understand why Bruce had done so: Damian’s absence was definitely noticed by the socialites and Bruce had been left to try and come up with a believable story. In even more punishment, Damian had to spend many hours dealing with learning the stock exchange market for Wayne Enterprises. It seemed as if he was pinching the bridge of his nose and wearing a surly frown all day. After hours of being strung in each direction, Damian had to focus on academics for a couple hours which was far more bearable, but proved difficult when his focus was absolutely shot. Finally giving up on the linear calculus book he wasn’t even really seeing, Damian decided to meditate in his room before training with Dick. 

His room was large, like all the rooms in the Wayne mansion, and he had little decor on the walls save for his katana collection. Beige walls towered up into a high ceiling, a large window opened to let in the cool air and boast a glimpse of Gotham’s skyscrapers, a yellow orange glow against the hazy black of the night. Warm light painted the room, and Damian sat on his dark bed glancing over at his art desk. He had plenty of sketchbooks filled to the brim with his art, but all of his recent ones showcased his favorite things about Dick. Dick’s large hands twisting in action, his muscles taut with anticipation, a plane of abdominal muscles with dark shadows and sharp angles, his soft hair spilling over his forehead, and far too many more. It was an outlet for thoughts that otherwise levied traitorously on the tip of his tongue.  _ Hm, Dick.  _ Instantly Damian’s fingers itched to hold a one of his only physical tethers which lay underneath his pillow. A selfie polaroid that Dick had taken years ago when he was Batman and Damian was his Robin; Dick’s handsome face was looking up into the camera with a bright smile and kind eyes, holding Damian tight and pressing the sides of their faces together. Damian was blushing, looking ruffled, and scowling nastily.  _ Never mind what I had been thinking... _ He had been twelve, and now he was seventeen. But it still was his favorite possession, and Damian would be lying if he said he didn’t draw comfort from it probably too often. Even a stray finger on its smooth surface could settle his mind. 

Damian exhaled and sat on his bed before crossing his legs and straightening his back. He would be useless if he didn’t get his emotions under control, and he was  _ not  _ going to make a fool out of himself this time. Emerald eyes shut and Damian’s mind cleared, allowing him to finally compose himself. 

\---

Damian grunted as he hit the mat hard, the wind knocking clean out of him. His knees scrabbled for purchase on the mats slick with sweat, and his lungs stuttered. 

“Almost, but I saw your legs tense to jump. Get up, let’s go again.” Dick hummed. He naturally was shirtless, sweat pouring off of him and looking entirely too put together to be fair. Damian had only had  _ several _ years of enduring Dick’s distracting sparring sessions, but each time he felt like he was only a thought away from listening to the lower half of his body. Dick wore black tights that truly could not have hugged his body more, Damian thought bitterly. Muscles rippled as Dick flipped backwards towards the other corner of the mat, the hair at the nape of his neck shiny with sweat. He flashed a grin at Damian and motioned for him to set up again. 

Damian felt heavy, but he pushed up anyways. Pain was not an obstacle for Damian, Hell, he  _ reveled  _ in it. Pain was one of the simplest and earliest things he truly understood, thanks to his upbringing. It was tangible proof that he had been too slow or too careless. Damian respected such simplicity, and could withstand great physical pain far better than most vigilantes. Things were just more complicated when Dick was part of the equation, that’s all.  _ Enough. Focus.  _

Damian got up and braced himself, controlling his breathing and straining on his toes. Dick and Damian circled each other, and Damian shot out to kick out Dick’s legs. Dick pushed hard off his hands and flipped over Damian, but not before the younger man could clip his midsection with an elbow. The acrobat groaned, but absorbed the offensive elbow long enough to grab onto it and pull Damian up high to slam him into the mat. Damian tensed before impact, and tried pushing back up to flip them. But fuck, Dick was too big, and he put Damian in a headlock and pushed him down hard with his weight, hips digging down into Damian. Snarling, Damian flailed trying to get any leverage, but couldn’t. Testing to see exactly how trapped he was, Damian moved his legs out slowly and froze once he realized the position they were in.  _ Fuck, don’t think about it. Don’t think about it.  _ But all Damian could think about was how Dick had him in a headlock, face crushed into the mat while his ass was up, pressed hard against Dick’s groin. How Dick’s body seemed to engulf Damian, hard planes straining and sweat mixing with Damian’s sweat. Dick’s fast exhales were right next to Damian’s neck, and Damian’s eyes almost rolled back into his head. Traitorous blood raced down towards the very last place Damian wanted it to, and he had to focus so hard not to grind back into Dick’s cock. But oh, so badly did he want to. How long had he fantasized about this very thing, this very position?  _ Of course he smells intoxicating.  _ Damian’s head turned and he locked eyes with Dick, whose pupils had blown wide hiding glittering blues. Damian knew he was blushing, jaw tense and nostrils flared. Despite all of his mental power imploring him to double tap on the mat and just release himself from this compromising position, he couldn’t help moving his hips  _ just _ a little. 

Damian moaned breathily, stiffening as the friction with the outline of Dick’s cock shot sparks up his spine. He could not stop thinking of how this felt so truly  _ good _ , so  _ right _ , how it felt so addicting to submit to Dick. _ No one _ else could do this, could bring Damian Wayne Al-Ghul, exemplar flaunted by the League of Assassins, heir to the House of Al-Ghul, the son of fucking  _ Batman _ , to his literal knees like this, shaking with the need to be taken, to be used. No, no one but Dick Grayson. The proud, haughty, arrogant, snarky prince, and yet he would cave so easy. He wanted so badly, to show Dick everything and bare his soul out to be taken, to be fucked and carved out by Dick and be marked as his. To let Dick pull his pleadings right out from his throat, to prove how wholly Dick owned him -  _ had always owned him _ . He imagined Dick pulling down his pants and sliding his cock between his ass, letting him feel exactly how big he was before he was gonna fill Damian up. Damian whimpered again and his breath caught as he felt the outline of Dick’s cock shift to rest on his ass, and his own cock twitched. 

“What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” Dick asked Damian quickly, and Damian’s fantasy incinerated. The tone in his voice was all wrong, it wasn’t lustful - it was husky, sure, but it was laced with concern and confusion. Damian’s eyes shot open and he felt his body still. 

“Yes. No. I, ah, am unharmed.”

“I’ve never heard you make that sound, I thought something was wrong, and I just,” Dick stuttered before peeling himself off of Damian and snapping up. He was half hard, pupils blown, and looked so fucking hot Damian wanted to bash his stupid head in. Damian wanted to melt into a puddle and be set on fire and then  _ maybe _ ground into the earth by Bane’s giant fucking boot. He was the hardest he had been in his entire life; Dick thought he had hurt him and so definitely was not pressed so deliciously against Damian’s ass anymore, and Damian didn’t even get to finish his fantasy or dare he even say it, finish in  _ real  _ life.  _ What the fuck am I doing?  _ Damian felt his mouth gape slightly, as he tried to gather himself while his thoughts turned obscene again. Damian admired Dick’s standing form, eyes combing over the dream before him. _ I want to suck his cock, I want to lick up his thighs, leave scratches on his back that bleed, grind down and open myself up on his dick. How’s that? Would you want to hear that, Dick? That I would give anything to be yours? That I already am and you have no idea? _

“No, I am not harmed, Grayson. Thank you for your concern, I apologize for my,” Damian licked his lips, trying not to look at Dick’s cock any more than a pseudo brother should.  _ None, right? Little too late for that.  _ “...miscalculation. Are you okay?” Damian finished hoarsely. 

Blue eyes opened wide, and for the first time, Dick seemed to take into account his own body and seemed almost confused for a moment. Dick cleared his throat and scratched the back of his neck. “Of course, yes. Totally, yes. Aha, I’m sorry for uh, well this” he finished lamely, gesturing towards his half mast erection before covering it with a hand. “It’s just an adrenaline thing, you know, blood pumping and bodies moving.” 

“I do not mind, I am very familiar with how the body works,” Damian ground out, trying to get his own under control. 

“Well, I apologize again - doesn’t normally happen. Regardless, good sparring session. You’re still anticipating too much, but you did well. I think you’re finally starting to grow into your frame. I’m going to go shower, so I’ll get out of your spiky hair.” Damian preened at the compliment, but then tried to reconcile the fact that Dick was probably going to go jerk off and he was just gonna have to know that without doing anything about it. 

Dick turned and tried to walk quickly to the showers without making his partial boner obvious, which was hard, because fuck, Damian thought, it was only half hard and already formidable. Damian’s prick swelled again at the thought, and he had to bite his lip to not let out a groan. A groan didn’t escape per se, but a gasp did, and Damian thought surely that the universe wouldn’t be so kind as to let that one pass. 

Dick turned, looking mischievous, mistaking Damian’s gasp as a breathy laugh. “You’re an excellent fighter, but I was trained by  _ Batman _ . Maybe you know him? Anyways, I’ll see you tomorrow, babybat,” Dick grinned and ducked his head, disappearing into the showers.  _ Of course he is joking while I’m over here trying my absolute hardest not to bust in my pants.  _

“Your modesty is so inspiring. Good night, idiot.” Damian rasped, feeling like the universe surely must hate him. 

Damian let his head fall on the mat, and tried to focus on the coolness that seemed to seep into his too hot body. So Dick hadn’t seen his very pressing boner, and didn’t know Damian had actually moaned like a whore under him. Great! Now Damian had the delightful opportunity to bask in the knowledge that his colossal obsession was becoming a  _ little _ more obvious than it should be.  _ Well, it could have gone far worse. He thinks he is the one that messed up, and I got to feel his cock against my ass. Enjoy the little things life gives you.  _ Damian heard one of the cave showers running, and he finally tried to sit up.  _ Holy shit, how did he not see this? He would have been disgusted - here I am almost ready to come and he didn’t really even touch me. Damn.  _ Damian scanned the room to make sure he was alone before jumping up and placing his hands carefully over his very sensitive prick.  _ What a clusterfuck. Okay, plan? Talk to Dick later, jerk it to him now. Ok good plan. _


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dick has to climb a wall he never knew was there.

\---

Damian heard a sharp rap on his door, and he monotonously called out, “Enter.” The very same head he had been imagining for the better half of the last hour poked out, and Damian couldn’t stop the imminent stomach flip it seemed he was doomed to on the daily. 

“Hi, little prince. What’s cracking?”

“Nothing of importance, and even less of your concern. What do you require?”

Dick snorted, “I almost forgot how painful you talked. I could get more talking with broody Bruce! Is it a hit with the ladies, at least?” Dick slid in the room and imitated Damian, sticking his head high and scrunching his face in a deep, dour frown. 

“ _ Your breasts are competent, and your posterior is unobjectionable. Shall we copulate _ ?” Dick declared before dissolving into laughs. Damian rolled his eyes and tried not to let Dick’s teasing actually affect him. 

“Tt.  _ No _ , I am not courting any ladies. I have little time for something so trivial. Besides, if I  _ wanted  _ to I could court whoever, I just don’t feel the need to.” Damian finished haughtily.  _ Why do I love this stupid man again? Who so clearly thinks so little of my romantic prowess?  _

“Oh, move over,” Dick laughed, throwing himself down on Damian’s bed and holding his head up with his hand to look fondly at Damian, who was frowning and sulking. “No, I know you are above such inconveniences like human emotion.” Dick peered over at Damian, narrowing his eyes thoughtfully. 

“Actually, I don’t know if I’ve ever seen you show interest in anyone. You’re seventeen, and I know I was pretty randy then. What  _ does  _ get you going?”  _ Unfortunately, everything about you, you infuriating, stupid ass.  _

“I don’t see why we need to be talking abo-”

“Come on, are you a tits or ass guy? Babs has some great tits, and Raven has an unbelievable ass. Surely you’ve noticed? Or do you like someone like Kori? Nah, Raven is more up your alley. Give me a hint!” 

Damian curled his lip and cringed, “Can you go one second without bringing up your  _ conquests _ , Grayson? You have everyone breaking their back over to look at you and you act like you don’t even realize. Maybe,  _ strangely  _ I don’t want to hear every damn place you’ve put your cock like some animal.” 

As if Damian needed to hear more about Dick’s string of passionate lovers, he was already  _ very, very  _ aware, thank you. No matter that Dick already soaked up all of the room’s attention, but there were people who Dick fucked and Damian wasn’t even allowed to kill them. No, he had to squeeze his fists and bite his tongue when an ex of Dick entered the room, poorly hiding how their eyes would rake over his body and leave parting words that were sultry and open ended. He knew Kori and Babs made a point to let him know he was always welcome in their beds. But Damian even noticed  _ Raven _ looking longingly after Dick, and he knew Raven didn’t fall easy. He knew vaguely of all of their passionate histories with Dick, which proved difficult when needing to be civil with them. Naturally, Dick was relatively oblivious and Damian at least was grateful for that. Truly, he could not have fallen for a more difficult person. The  _ We Love Dick and Also his Dick! _ club was already massive, but also apparently had Drake and Red Hood heading it. How distasteful to be joined by such wastes of space, Damian thought moodily. 

“They’re not  _ conquests _ , Dami. We had very loving relationships and I am just as much their conquest if you insist on thinking like that. And no one is doing that, I should think I would notice. Regardless, I’m the one teasing  _ you _ here, not the other way around. None of them catch your eye?” Two beats passed. “Do you have a thing for guys?” 

“Grayson! Cease your incessant questioning, this is  _ entirely  _ inappropriate! You can’t just  _ say  _ things like that.”

“It’s not a bad thing to appreciate a dude. Hell, I can appreciate the male body. I’m just curious.”

“I - no. I’m not gay, but I don’t care for women either, for the record. Not that it is  _ anyone’s  _ business.” Damian hissed.  _ Does that count? I don’t care for men, but I care for you. Is that what you want to hear? Your little brother has a boner just for you? No, surely not.  _

“Are you sure? You don’t have the hots for anyone? You’re blushing way too hard not to be hiding  _ someone. _ ” Dick whined. He sat up and held himself up with a forearm, Damian trying desperately not to think about how good even something as simple as his arm looked. Damian scooted back and brought his knees close to his throat, glaring at Dick and trying to settle his pulse. 

“Come on, please little prince? You know I would never tell. I just miss you, and now you’re all grown up and I can’t even get to know if you really do have to deal with love like the rest of us mortals.” 

Damian scowled. “Why would I tell you? I don’t see why you care. You certainly do not visit like you care.”

Dick winced. “Ouch. You never go for anything less than the jugular, do you? I know, babybat. Bludhaven has been really busy, and I’ve just been taking a lot of time to just...figure myself out again, I guess. But you’re still my favorite, just don’t tell the others,” he said, winking. 

“Hmmph, I suppose if it gets you to shut up.” It was embarrassingly easy to talk to Dick, but in no world was he just gonna tell him. Looking away, Damian tried to think about how much exactly he was going to divulge that wouldn’t give too much away. Spurred on by the flood of dopamine of being Dick’s favorite -  _ take that, Drake  _ \- Damian closed his eyes and tried to focus. “I do, actually like someone, but it’s not really just like.” Damian ducked his head and felt the back of his neck get hot. “I know that I love them. And no, before you ask, I am not telling. I fear my love is...unrequited, and I am content to love them from afar rather than cause them any discomfort.”

“What?!” Dick spluttered. “I have a hard time believing anyone could allure the great Damian Wayne, and an even harder time imagining someone in their right mind turning you down. You’re just gonna devote yourself to them and never tell them?”

Damian looked at Dick beneath thick eyelashes, and exhaled quickly. “Obviously. I cannot lose them, and I don’t wish to burden them. Ever. Is that so difficult to understand?” Damian snapped. 

Dick’s face softened and he looked into angry jade eyes. Dick mapped Damian’s vulnerable face, eyes trailing along dark eyebrows, a flared nose, full lips, and spiky hair. Damian looked as taut as a wire, and so insanely passionate. That really was Damian - he never did anything halfway. This vulnerable boy was turning into a man, embodying the very best of his parents’ traits, but navigating through a life so lonely, Dick lamented. For all that prickliness Damian wore, he was the most truly kind and devoted individual he knew. He did _ still _ practically bleed a need to be accepted, to measure up, to make his family proud. He had curbed his anger and upbringing, and struggled to connect with the cruel world around him. And yet, here he was. This unbelievably skilled, handsome, and strong young man. Trying again and again, and recognizing that love was not possession, as Dick knew he thought previously. Allowing himself to love, albeit afar, and laying down his heart and life for this lucky individual. Dick wondered who it was. He knew Damian interacted with a lot of other vigilantes alongside Bruce, but Dick couldn’t easily think of anyone obvious. It didn’t really matter - Damian would tell him when he was ready. 

Dick reached out and grasped Damian’s neck, bringing his forehead forward to rest on. His fingers carded through the hair on the nape of Damian’s neck, and he could smell the soap Alfred always buys, sending him back to simpler times when he lived in the manor and the simplest thing in life was how to impress Bruce. 

“No, Damian, it isn’t. Whoever it is, is very lucky. But you should tell them. Don’t devote yourself to a life of loving without ever actually taking that leap. If they’re worth it, they’ll see you for you, I promise.” Dick smiled softly, eyes crinkling, and moved to kiss Damian on the forehead. Dick’s eyes trailed up Damian’s face and almost stopped seeing how open Damian’s lips were, or the way his hooded eyes seemed to darken. A quick urge to push his lips forward came unbidden in Dick’s mind, and he faltered.  _ What the fuck was that?  _ Mentally resetting, Dick closed his eyes tightly and exhaled before finally kissing Damian’s forehead and pulling back. 

“I hope you know you can always tell me. I’ll be around in and out for a couple more days, so we can make up for lost time if you’d like. I’m gonna go work on a case with B.”

Damian drew himself up and ran a hand through his hair. “I appreciate the sentiment. Yes, let’s. Good night, Grayson.”

Dick pushed himself up from the bed and mock-saluted Damian. “Love you, little prince.” Damian let a small smile tug at the corner of his mouth. 

After turning off the light, Dick left the room. As soon as Damian heard the last of Dick’s retreating footsteps, he let out a sigh. 

“I love you. More than you could ever know.” Damian whispered into the dark, empty room. 

\---

Damian’s arms shook with the effort of pulling himself up over the beams for what felt like the gazillionth time. Sweat ran down his torso and his chest stuttered trying to breathe deep. He had been at it for hours, trying to put his energy into something productive, and well,  _ maybe  _ it served as a way to punish himself, if he was being honest. Anytime Damian found himself hard and itching to think about a certain acrobat, he threw himself into training with a vengeance. 

_ What if I did...tell him? It could go insanely terrible, or just terrible. Dick wouldn’t cut me out of his life...right? Easy to say when you’re excluding the fact that the sheer sight of you makes me want to fall to my knees and beg for your cock. Ugh.  _ Ever since Dick had insisted Damian not sentence himself to pining in solitude, Damian couldn’t stop thinking about what would actually happen if he did tell. He hadn’t even entertained the preposterous idea before, seeing as it would only end in at best an awkward letdown or at worst Dick running for the hills. None of the variables changed, really, but now Damian couldn’t shake the thought of coming clean. Just talking to Dick a couple nights prior had teased what it would feel like to finally tell, and the momentary weight off Damian’s shoulders was an enticing taste of what it would feel like to finally live free unashamedly.  _ But that’s selfish, right? _

“Well don’t you look like a little ball of sunshine, demon brat?” Jason stalked on the training mats, reaching to take his helmet off. 

“I didn’t know I’d have the misfortune of seeing you here, Todd. Are you lost? The Robin Rejects club doesn’t meet here.” Damian sneered. 

Cackling without a trace of humor, Jason sat on a nearby bench and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. “Just as shitty as the day I met you. Heard from a little birdy that you’re drooling over Golden Boy here. Naturally I thought I’d come and see for myself. I mean, wouldn’t take a genius since you’ve been practically riding his dick forever.” 

“As usual, that is none of your fucking business,  _ Hood _ .” Damian hissed, making his next pull ups quicker. 

“Get in line, squirt. You really think Dickie bird would even look at you? Why would he want an arrogant, snarky, fucked up little brat? I mean I at least  _ know _ I don’t deserve him, but doesn’t mean I couldn’t suck him off and give him the best orgasm of his life.” Jason smirked, looking far too casual. “I’d just drop my pants and let him have at it one night on patrol. Can you even imagine? I’d take it any way he wanted. Him fucking me with that big dick on the rooftops with the city glow behind us. Have you seen it? Thick, long, and just the littlest curve at the tip. Damn, I could get hard even thinking about it.”

Damian shook with rage, knuckles white against the bar. “Do  _ not  _ talk about him like that, you are nothing to him. He would  _ never _ touch you,” he gritted out.  _ Not over me, right? No.  _

Jason laughed and rose. “God, I haven’t enjoyed something like this in a fucking while. You’re so easy. If he did ever fuck you, and that is the  _ biggest _ if ever because Dickie bird is our holy moral saint, it’d just be because you look like daddy bats. You’d have to force Dickie bird to even give you a second thought,” Jason cackled. 

Damian clenched his fists and tried not to see red.  _ Breathe. He is just trying to get a rise out of you. None of it is true. Just breathe.  _

Dick walked down the cave steps and bounded down to the mats, soft footsteps the only alert to his arrival. Jason sideyed to meet his curious gaze. 

“Oh, hey there, Jason. Didn’t expect you. You hanging around?”

“Nah. But maybe I’ll see  _ you _ around? Looking good, Golden Boy, ” Jason winked, laughing, and turned to walk towards his bike. 

Dick cocked an eyebrow eerily similar to Bruce, before shaking his head and rolling his eyes. “...Okay. Catch you later, little wing.”

Dick startled at the ticking time bomb seething on the bars. Damian was audibly grinding his teeth and Dick wondered if his gaze alone could set a fire. 

“What did Jason wanna talk about? You guys never hang out.”

“Hood was just being crude. Nothing of importance.” 

“Oh, whatever.” Dick said, unconvinced. “I’m gonna go practice on the rings for just a little, holler if you need anything before I go.”

“Hn.” 

As Dick padded away, Damian allowed himself to ponder what Hood had said. He had to admit, amidst all the shit he spewed, he was right about one thing: Dick was never gonna notice unless Damian forced his hand. And when did Dick knowing come into play so certainly? A part of him still couldn’t even comprehend telling Dick but a growing part of Damian...It was like Dick’s gentle reassurance had kindled a fire inside Damian, and here it was, raging through Damian and clawing up his throat anytime he thought about Dick. Which needless to say, was a lot. Could he tell Dick in a way that wouldn’t ruin anything? Just to  _ tell _ Dick and let him know that Damian had devoted everything to him, but would do it from afar? That Dick need only say how high, and Damian would jump blindly? Damian knew better than to expect anything. For Dick was the sun and the stars and the whole damn universe, and all Damian was was broken and selfish. 

_ If I do, I will show him everything. All my cards, and then I will await my judgement. If I show him this isn’t some stupid little crush, maybe he will recognize me as an adult. I will admit defeat gracefully, but only after I court him not looking for anything. Then maybe he won’t freak out as much.  _ Damian watched Dick swinging on the rings, arms taut and elbows locked as he sliced through the air.  _ How to force his hand without him really realizing? Hm… _ The rings were far enough from the mats that Dick might not notice Damian at all, but if Damian paraded around the fact that he was head over heels in love in a heartbeat, well. Damian felt like that wouldn’t have the same endgame. 

Damian dropped from the bars with soundless feet. He crouched and relaxed before stretching out against the bar. His legs spread, Damian pushed his head towards his ankle propped up, and he arched his back far more than necessary. Switching feet, Damian made sure to dip his head and arch his back even more. Under thick eyelashes and the shadow of his arms, Damian’s eyes caught Dick glancing over before quickly looking off.  _ Needs a little more.  _

Damian rose slowly, dragging his hands over his legs slowly. Righting himself, Damian sank slowly onto his feet, opening his legs and bouncing on his feet a little. Under the guise of stretching, Damian allowed his mind to wander with thoughts of the nearby acrobat. Heart racing, Damian stretched deeper, and moaned quietly, plagued with thoughts of Dick pinning him down at a gala and fucking him for everyone to see how Damian was only  _ his _ . How rough would he be? Would he drive Damian down into the floor or would he caress him? Would he touch Damian or would he just use him? Quick pants sprinkled between hushed groans left Damian, and he began to lose focus. Dick had stopped swinging, and instead was peering over at Damian intensely. 

Questions died on Dick’s tongue every time he heard a moan from Damian, and he struggled to focus on the matter at hand. Because clearly there was a  _ problem _ , because Damian was almost acting as if...as if, he was  _ aroused _ . And Dick couldn’t seem to look away. This was insanely wrong on every single level there was, Dick knew, and yet, he could not for the life of him look away. The same spark of excitement raced from his fingers to his spine - the very same one that almost made him kiss Damian earlier. What even was that?  _ Who is basically my little brother, who was my fucking ward. He was my Robin, and here I am, hard as a brick.  _ Dick was not blind, he had known Damian would be exceptionally attractive since the day he met him - that’s just genetics. With Talia’s rich brown skin and glittering jade eyes and Bruce’s face down to the very brows and sharp angles, there was no instance in which Damian could not look gorgeous. But Dick had never...never let himself even  _ contemplate  _ Damian in that sense. It felt walled off in his mind, as if he was aware there was something forbidden across the wall and it was just simpler to keep skipping along. Quiet moans tore through Dick’s mind, bringing the wall down with each sound that went straight to Dick’s groin. Dick tried to pull his gaze, but the wall called to him, and he couldn’t shake the feeling that this was inevitable; he felt chained and yet so free to try and consider what he was feeling was genuine, true attraction. To Damian. It didn’t even really seem like Damian, but at the same time it seemed all too familiar. Damian was gorgeous, yes, but the passion he embodied, the hurricane of emotion that always spilled over into his eyes, it was breathtaking.  _ That  _ was the hottest part - the part that was purely Damian. Dick knew every mannerism Damian had, when his frown deepened and his eyes furrowed, when his lips pinched exactly like Bruce, even what the slightest twitch of his eyes meant. Dick knew  _ everything  _ about this kid, and so it felt jarring to see Damian in a completely new sense but seem so familiar. Damian was biting his lip and clearly straining to be less obvious, but it was clear to Dick that Damian wasn’t really there, not really. 

Damian was hard, erection twitching against tight kevlar. Pressing his stomach on the mat, Damian lifted his hips and let a soft whine out. The fantasy morphed, and he imagined arguing with Dick while he was Batman, Dick snarling and whirling around to get in Damian’s face. Blazing blue eyes would raze Damian’s snark immediately, Dick’s jaw looked so tense, and every muscle in his body seemed to swell. Damian was engulfed in the massive fury that was Dick, and he couldn’t help but look at how magnificent he looked in the cowl. Damian would fall down hard to his knees, and look up and drink in Dick’s wrath. Dick would growl deep, telling him that he needed to shut his mouth or he would shut it for him, and Damian would whine, already desperate. Gloved hands would grab Damian’s hair and snap him forward, while he opened the jock compartment of his suit. Damian would surge forward, trying to swallow down the whole length as far as he could, and keen at the dick making his jaw ache already. Dick would tell him that he owns Damian, that Damian was  _ only his _ ,  _ had always been his, little prince _ . Damian would choke around Dick’s cock, working furiously to try and swallow as much as he could and revel in the taste - the mere  _ thought  _ that Dick was using  _ his  _ mouth, not Barbara, not Kori, not Raven, not Hood or Drake, no, only  _ Damian _ . Dick would yank Damian up by his hair and push his head down, snarling in his ear and possessive hands grabbing Damian everywhere. He would grab Damian’s hips hard enough to bruise, lifting him up and pulling his tights down. Dick would spit at his hole, pushing a large digit in and another far too quickly. He would grab Damian’s dick firmly and jerk him while he pushed in, agonizingly slow to fit his large cock in Damian’s smaller body. Damian would chant his name through the pain, grind back hard, and push the cowl off to card through thick raven locks. Dick would pound into Damian, telling Damian he was  _ only his _ ,  _ and he was only Damian’s _ , and Damian jerked forward into the mat, eyes rolling back as he came from the fantasy playing in his mind. One hand jerking himself through it, Damian clenched his ass, imagining Dick everywhere. He gasped, riding the wave of a fantasy that felt so  _ real  _ he hadn’t come so hard in weeks. 

Dick felt stunned, eyes locked on Damian’s writhing form, and he couldn’t breathe. He was painfully hard now, eyes zeroing in on Damian’s strained face as he came, eyes pressed tightly together and teeth bared, face hot with exertion, and hair slicked with sweat. Dick felt as if his mind had short circuited, and the only thing he could do was replay how hot Damian had looked. Again and again, he could only think about how Damian’s body looked arching with his ass up, how his teeth grinded with the effort to be quiet. Damian’s eyes opened and Dick jolted, recognizing that not only was he perversely watching his  _ younger brother masturbate _ , but he knew it was for Damian’s love interest -  _ very  _ much not him. Dick stumbled back, trying to duck under the railing to dart to the cave showers, but he was almost paralyzed. It was not for  _ him _ , it was for whoever Damian was thinking of. Dick’s stomach twisted painfully, and his throat closed up. Hot envy coursed through Dick, and his chest tightened. Envy morphed into rage, and Dick found himself balling his fists and pressing his eyes until he saw white. 

Dick managed to stagger into the showers, letting out a painful breath. Ripping his training sweats off, Dick jammed the shower on and tried to calm his breathing.  _ What the actual fuck did I just do? Why the fuck did I watch that and enjoy it no less? Why? And what, now I’m fucking jealous? As if Damian’s mine? As if I own him? I’m going to burn in a special hell. Dirty special hell for perverts.  _ Dick heaved, trying to lessen the growing pressure in his chest. His whole world felt tilted - he felt ill and dirty, and he felt baffled as to how strongly he reacted.  _ Why does it bother me so much to imagine someone fucking him? Someone else making him look like that? Jesus, fuck.  _ Dick held his breath and released it slowly. He turned the water cold and willed his erection away, trying to stabilize.  _ Okay. I am not allowed to feel that way. I did not mean to witness that. Damian probably did not realize I was even there anymore. It doesn’t matter what I felt about it, because it has nothing to do with me. Keep my distance and my head. Get your shit together for Damian.  _ Dick toweled off and went upstairs to change again, bent on throwing himself into a case to try and forget whatever the fuck that was. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Starting to get in the meat here! I'm very fond of the idea that it's kind of Robin tradition to have a giant crush on Dick, and even more it never really goes away. And Dick feeling morally compromised when realizing he is attracted to Damian,,,,,yes. I love this pairing so much, and I do not do them justice but I'll die trying. Thanks for reading :)


	3. Chapter 3

“- these shipments are rumored to come in either Port Adams or the Bleake Island’s western port, from what we gathered from the thug Nightwing caught. I ran a check on him, and he’s worked extensively with the Riddler, though I don’t recognize him. Held off on giving information for a notable amount of time - clearly, this agenda is a very pressing matter. I’ve called you here because this affects all of us. This is bigger than I anticipated - several high class villains are backing this scheme.” Batman said gruffly, eyes narrowing. 

“Oh, these _reunions_ make my heart flutter just as much as the next Robin with daddy issues, but I don’t really see ho-” 

Batman growled, eyes flashing, stepping towards Jason. “ _You_ handle the ports and the criminal activity within them, as you’ve so kindly insisted on. It affects you as well, whether you like it or not. If we can just have a _simple_ meeting witho-” 

Dick pushed between Bruce and Jason, who were looking closer and closer to snapping. Dick shoved Jason back, hands going back to hold Bruce back. _How long did we last this time? Three minutes?._ “Damn it, stop it! We are here to work together, not go after each other’s throats. Put aside your emotionally stunted idiotic pride, and _focus_ . Honestly.” Dick said exasperatedly, throwing his hands up. Jason fumed, putting his helmet back on and crossing his arms. Dick looked back at Bruce, trying to put all of his _come on, you’re better than this_ into his gaze, and he privately relished the fact that Bruce did look a little repentant. Bruce straightened, jaw clenched, and broadened his stance. _Insufferable, emotionally stunted, impulsive men. I did not come to play buffer._ In his peripheral, Dick saw Tim look uncomfortable and Damian frown deeper. 

Batman continued stiffly;“In any case, there are a couple leads that need to be dealt with. An associate of Riddler has links in the Gotham City Bank that need to be run up through that system, the warehouse a street off of Canal Street has suspicious new owners, and we need to investigate the possible ports. We need to double up and cover more ground, _hence_ , why I called you all here tonight.” 

Dick noticed Damian sending several glances towards Jason when he thought no one was looking, and Dick felt a familiar sinking feeling. It had been several days since the “incident,” but he couldn’t help the horrible connection his brain made between Damian and the helmeted outlaw. He couldn’t shake the feeling that Jason and Damian had been talking about _something_ important - clearly something that Damian wouldn't tell Dick. Jason had gotten Damian all riled up, and then next thing Dick knows, Damian’s looking like he’s getting absolutely defiled on the mats and more, that he _loves_ it. _No, no, no. I’ve done a good job not thinking about it. Not about to ruin that right now._ Dick saw Jason smirk lewdly at Damian after catching one of his glances, and Damian stiffened, looking pointedly away and flushing. Dick felt his stomach twist painfully. _Doesn’t mean I have to entertain it, though._

“Okay, let’s split up. Tim?” Pale blue eyes blinked in surprise, before Tim nodded quickly with a bright smile. Jason rolled his eyes and snorted. 

“Hood, Robin, you take the warehouse. I’ll scout the ports and then I’ll join you, Nightwing.” Batman inclined his head to Dick, before turning and grappling off to Bleake Island. 

Dick noticed Jason’s chuckle as he walked over to Damian, but before Dick could see Damian’s face, he turned and followed Tim. Dick already didn’t feel over the moon at needing to see the youngest Wayne. He knew he would need to analyze recent events eventually, but not anytime soon. Not to mention his new suspicion that Damian might maybe actually want to fuck Jason - that was a _lot_ to unpack. _I feel ill just thinking about it._ Preferably he’d unpack his trauma far away in Bludhaven with nobody around. _Or never, really._

Dick missed the way Damian’s face broke, dark eyelashes covering hurt emeralds. Damian glared as Tim snuck a smug glance back. Damian loathed how obviously Tim had just _preened_ at getting picked, as if this meant Dick was gonna go fuck him or something, as if it really meant anything. _It did seem pretty deliberate. Lost out to Drake, no less._ And of course, he had gotten Todd. Who just had this shit eating grin as soon as Dick appeared. Damian felt helpless, desperate to make sure that Todd wouldn't say anything and ruin things even more. The entire time he felt taut as a wire, obsessed with the fact that he really didn’t know Todd all that well and Todd knew some very dangerous information. Damian exhaled, granting himself that one moment of weakness, before straightening and frowning almost boredly. 

“Oh, the romance of being not picked. Looks like it’s you and me, squirt. Wanna role play the scene again and take turns getting picked? Ok, I’ll go first. ‘Oh, Dick, please pick me!’ You’re Dick. I’m me. Go ahead and tell me how much my ass has been distracting you, go on.” Jason bent provocatively, ass shaking, and Damian tried _very_ hard to remember why he had promised never to kill again. 

Damian sighed, running off the building to grapple on the next one, trying not to think about how he wouldn't hear Jason anymore if he just free fell with no grapple. Jason’s guffaws followed him as he sped through the skyline. 

“Too _easy_!” 

\---

“Okay, I think I copied everything onto this flash drive. Usually I or Batman could hack into it from the Cave, but they’re using this new firewall system that is top notch. Definitely illegally bought and installed without the bank knowing.” Tim relayed, pocketing the flash drive and looking up at Dick. They were in the bank’s backroom, trying to acquire the information Batman wanted, without alerting any security. 

Dick was lost in thought while on the lookout, or rather trying to be lost in some _other_ thoughts. He had done a splendid job before that night not thinking about recent events, but seeing Damian and Jason interact so charged solidified his unease. 

“Nightwing? You okay?” 

Dick swiveled, taking in Tim’s concerned face. Feeling embarrassed for being worlds away when Tim so clearly appreciated the rare alone time they got, Dick tried to give Tim all his attention. “Of course. Excellent job, that was wicked fast! I’m sure the others aren’t done yet - want to catch up and wait for B to call?” 

Tim beamed, and nodded his affirmative. Dick focused on Tim for the first time that night. It had been awhile since they’d been alone. Tim’s angular features weren’t exactly soft, but the word that kept thrumming up into Dick’s mind was “pretty.” His jaw was slimmer and sharper than other members of the family, and his ivory skin was far different from Dick’s tanned skin. He didn’t see Tim as much anymore, seeing as he mostly stayed in Bludhaven, and when he _did_ go to Gotham, well. He mostly hung around Damian or bothered Bruce. Kind, reliable, and neglected Tim, Dick thought ruefully. _I got to be a better brother._

Dick grinned in response. He strode over to the open vent in the room, crawling in and making his way up to the top floor. Ducking out of the fire exit once he heard Tim behind him, Dick jumped down to sit on the terrace overlooking the busy street below. Dick patted the seat next to him. Tim sat down, kicking dark muscled legs out to swing in the air. 

“So, tell me how you’ve been. I know the Titans have been good and you’re taking a break. But we haven’t had some real talk in awhile.” 

“No, you’re right, unfortunately. I’ve been okay. Happy to be back in Gotham but also the manor can be pretty maddening at times. I feel like I’ve finally solidified who I want to be and have earned my place. Been mostly doing some detective work with B.” 

“That’s wonderful! I’m proud of you. I’m glad you’re finally seeing what everyone else can see.” At the way Tim snorted, Dick amended his statement. “Well, everyone _should_ see it. I know Jason does get along with you fairly well, but Damian does recognize your talents even though he’s awful. He’d probably rather kill himself than tell you it, but he knows not to underestimate you. He is a little shit like that.” 

Tim’s lip twitched up, and he laughed softly. “Well, I think we are more alike than he originally thought, much to his displeasure. Has he...talked to you anytime recently? Like, you in particular?” Dick furrowed his brow, trying to see where Tim was going with this. It was plain to see Tim was digging for something, but Dick couldn’t decide on what. _Does he think Damian told me about his crush? That it might be Jason?_ Dick felt ill even at the thought. He still wasn’t sure, but it wouldn’t leave his head. It felt wrong to think about his brothers like that. He could admit Damian’s type was a little bit ambiguous, but _Jason_ , that would surprise him. He couldn’t tell _if_ , and only _if_ , this was actually a thing, _if_ Jason would feel the same. Jason was always a wild card romantically, and Dick didn’t really try and stick his nose where it didn’t belong. He knew Jason mostly swung towards men, but he knew he didn’t really have any lasting relationships. Just seemed like he was hung up on someone and didn’t know what to do about it, or just wanted casual things in general. _Damian can’t do casual. He doesn’t have a casual bone in his body. I don’t get it._

“Hm. About me, specifically? No, not that I can think of.” _Why? Does Damian want my blessing to go fuck Jason? Well I’m not giving it._ Dick eyed Tim, who seemed amused and relieved. _What, does everyone know something I don’t?_ “Is there something I should know?” Dick asked, annoyed. 

Tim shook his head, smiling. “Hardly. I think some things just _are_ , and you can’t force your feelings just to break the dream.... It almost feels good, that pain from _afar._ I love to think about what ifs, but I am content to let the dream go on as long as I can. That simplicity is the only thing I can guarantee myself. It’s enough for me, now at least.” 

_Uh, hello? What? Are we having the same conversation at all?_ Dick knew he had been slapped with something so meaningful and insightful, but he felt like his brain had jumped out of his head into traffic stories below. Dick looked down, sure that he would see that pink glob waving back at him and saying “don’t worry, sport! You got it!” Dick didn’t know what the hell Tim meant, and his head hurt with all the complexities within his life that just seemed to be getting bigger, and more and more, seemed to be leaving him out purposefully. 

Dick grimaced, bringing a hand up to rake through his hair awkwardly. “Well, I’ll be honest. I don’t really know what _that_ meant or came from, but I can see what you mean generally. Feelings make everything not simple, so I suppose finding simplicity in them is the dream.” Dick finished weakly. Tim laughed, eyes crinkling, and he looked fondly over at the acrobat. “Another day then. How have things been in your life? Got any new flame?” Tim’s look became piercing in only the way he and Bruce could be. 

Dick wished his romantic history wasn’t as common knowledge as it so obviously was, since it seemed like he couldn’t go into a conversation without some mention of his romantic prowess. _I know Tim doesn’t mean it like that. He’s just looking for a way to connect._

“No, I’m as single as can be. I don’t mind the occasional fling, but I am trying to devote all of myself to Bludhaven right now. Let’s see. What’s new in my life? Hm...Lately, I -” Dick faltered. _How much can I tell him? It’s Tim, after all. Probably my best confidant right now._ “Lately, I’ve been struggling with something about myself that I didn’t really consider. Like I’m...darker than I thought? More fucked up? I don’t like it. I really try to be as good as I can be, be someone to rely on, but now I’m not too sure.” Dick said quickly, risking a glance to his partner. Tim’s brows jumped, and he looked contemplative. He seemed to be wrestling with something on the tip of his tongue, but instead just hummed after a couple beats. 

“I see. I won’t pry, but. Is it about someone or the nature of someone? Like. Do you think you are darker really, or are you just demonizing something that doesn’t need to be?” 

Dick blinked, wrapping his head around how truly introspective Tim was. Dick hoped that Tim couldn’t tell the reason was being incredibly horny for your former Robin and jealous of an ex-Robin who had been through more shit than anyone he knew. _What a cursed sentence._ But then, that wasn’t all of it. It felt extra taboo because Damian was a younger boy. _There, I said it._ He didn’t ever seriously think about _that_ in relation to him. Sure, he had the natural crush on Bruce while growing up, but that was different. He’d always be aware of Bruce in that way, but he didn’t have this overwhelming urge to act on it. But this time, it wasn’t just idolizing someone, it was wanting to _defile_ them. To own them, body and heart, to be _predatory_ ...to an underage boy. _That definitely deserves a little bit of demonizing._

“You’re very good at this.” _Almost too good._ “I guess I don’t know. I’d like to believe the latter, but, I don’t think so. I’m planning on avoiding thinking about it for as long as I can, actually. I think that is the most mature decision, frankly.” Dick let out a breathy laugh, feeling a little bit lighter with the half joke. 

“If you need any help with that, I promise I’m a safe place for you. For _anything_.” Tim looked over meaningfully at Dick, who missed his sentiment entirely. 

“Thank you, Tim. My little beacon of reason.” Dick ruffled Tim’s hair, pulling him tight. Tim closed his eyes in exasperation, but returned the hug sincerely. 

“Nightwing, Red Robin. Success, I take it?” Batman ground out, stepping closer to the pair and out from the shadows. White lenses landed on Dick, as they naturally did. Large black boots peeked under the billowing mess of a cape. 

“Indubitably, B. Who do you think we are?” 

Batman grunted, stepping closer to retrieve the flashdrive Tim extended out to him. “Excellent. Heard anything from Robin and Red Hood?” 

“I’m sure they’re getting along _just_ fine.” Tim said. Dick frowned, trying to squash the jealousy that seemed to always be lurking just under the surface. 

“Thank you for coming tonight, Nightwing. I appreciate it.” Batman said quietly. 

“I am _right_ here. I actually was the one who got the information, not like it matters.” Tim grumbled. 

Dick got up, and placed a firm hand on Batman’s shoulder. Dick saw the way that Bruce seemed to swell under his hand. _Damn, I need to come back more. I’m neglecting everyone here._ It wasn’t often that he interacted with Bruce so closely, especially since he moved to Bludhaven. He knew distantly of Bruce’s devotion, after all, it had been one of the most constant things of his life. He knew they wouldn’t cross that gap. But it didn’t hurt to know that. He just felt loved, knew that he loved the man, and that was just how simple it was. _Maybe that was what Tim was talking about. That explains it perfectly, now that I think about it._ Dick smiled softly, and squeezed his shoulder. Putting all his love into the way he looked at Bruce, Dick gave himself room to think about the more pressing matter in his heart. 

“You know better than to ever think I wouldn’t come. Laters, B. See you Timmy!” Dick took off and dove off the ledge, wind whistling against him, looking every bit like he belonged in the air. 

\---

“Okay, what day did you wake up and just think, ‘holy shit, I’m a bottom’? Because at first I wouldn’t see it, seeing as Bruce and Talia are your parents, but like now that I think about it, you’re so keen to please. Now _I’ve_ been around the bend once or twice or twenty, and I’ll be honest. _It’s awesome_.” Jason gestured wildly. He had been chattering for the past twenty minutes as soon as he realized that talking was the last thing Damian was interested in. Damian knew most of it was because he just wanted to aggravate him, but he also felt like Jason was happy to talk freely about something that so obviously was a very central thing in his life. Surely, Jason did not tell his mob ring underlings about how he liked to take it in the ass. 

“One time while swinging through Bludhaven to go bother Dick, guess who I saw! Saw the man of the hour absolutely _drilling_ Raven into the bed in his apartment. I just sat up shop in the building over and enjoyed the show. Got those bigass magnifying goggles on before I could even get my pants down.” Jason said wistfully. “I bet I looked like a giant fly with those goggles, _and_ then I was jacking off. I hope if anyone saw that they got some therapy.” 

“Dear _God,_ do you ever fucking shut up? And you wonder why you don’t fucking fit in!” Damian snapped, whirling on his helmeted partner. 

Jason surged forward, grabbing Damian’s neck and pushed him against the nearby brick wall. Damian could see his own furious face in the reflection of the red helmet. 

“That’s _rich_ , coming from you.” Jason hissed. “You should be grateful there’s something about you that amuses me, demon brat. Because frankly, you don’t have the most _sunny_ personality. So you’re gonna shut up and take it, or I might have to accelerate Dick’s imminent heart attack by telling him myself.” 

Damian snarled, breaking out of Jason’s grip. He pulled his cape tight around him, trying to stave off his growing temper. 

“Why do you even _care_ ? Why can’t you just leave me _alone_?” Damian asked bitterly. Jason snorted, looking up to the sky. 

“Well, demon brat, it never ceases to surprise me why Golden Boy hangs out with you. Now that I know for sure you have an absolutely gargantuan crush on him, consider payback for you being the biggest pain in my ass I’ve ever had in my illustrious career. Plus, it’s funny as _fuck._ ” 

“It’s not funny. It’s not a _crush_. It’s everything. You should know better than anyone what it’s like to not have anything and then all of a sudden have something.” 

Jason cocked his head, considering. “Well, you’ve got it a little backwards for me. I had it, then I went kablammy, and then came back and you know the rest.” Damian frowned, not taking the bait. Jason looked at him seriously for several beats. “Okay, so you’re serious. Are you actually like, gonna tell him?” 

“I don’t know. I don’t want him to leave.” Damian admitted. “Why don’t _you_ tell him?” Damian asked irritably, regretting it as soon as it left his mouth. He really didn’t want any potential situation in which Jason and Dick were romantic, and egging someone as impulsive as Jason was not really the wisest choice. 

“I haven’t _told_ him, for real. But I’ve made it obvious I fuck guys that look like him. So yeah, I love the idiot but I’m not celibate over it. I always flirt with him. He’s just so unbelievably dumb at noticing.” 

Damian could at least agree with that. Dick was pretty clueless to his effect on people. Damian still loathed the idea of Jason around Dick, but he supposed he and Jason’s situations weren’t _too_ different. _Solidarity in love with Dick is an easy group to join._ He hadn’t heard Jason talk so honestly about something vulnerable, and Damian felt uncharacteristically appreciative. Then Jason’s finger jabbed Damian in the chest, disrupting his kinder than usual thoughts about the outlaw. 

“But if you fuck the guy, I swear I’ll punch your face so hard. Like I’ll punch your fucking brain. Then ask you all about it and you have to tell me everything. But seriously. Not okay. I loved the fool before your snot nose even knew about him. I’ll fucking kick your ass.” Jason promised. 

Damian didn’t doubt it, but then again, that would be a lovely problem to have; his beating hinged on getting to fuck Dick. _Too bad we’ll never know._ Jason bumped his shoulder roughly, moving to continue down the warehouse alley. Despite Jason’s threats, Damian did feel like they had settled something, found some sort of shaky ground. Granted, the ground had Dick’s face all over it, and they were too busy admiring it to fight, but it was still something. He could _almost_ go as far as to respect Jason for his genuinity in his love for Dick. _He must really love him if he’s orbited around him for so long..._ Jason was right - he had liked him before even Damian. _Didn’t matter._ Damian knew his devotion to his beloved couldn’t be topped. It was just in his bones. 

Damian strode after Jason, hoping that Dick would stay in Gotham after their mission long enough that he could try and talk to him. His heart ached remembering the way Dick so pointedly ignored him, but he did feel a little lighter after understanding where Jason was coming from. _One giant, terrible problem at a time._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you can see I really was not kidding about how everyone loves Dick. and he is so oblivious and jealous, my poor dumb man. and Damian, God i could talk about that stubborn devoted fool for the rest of my life. anyways, comments are always appreciated! they keep me going writing this heaping pile of unnecessarily angsty garbage. hope you enjoyed! and if you're here for the sex, don't worry. that's coming soon, and it is not a quick scene. I am very embarrassed about how long it is lolz. got to put down the angsty/pining/jealous foundation to make it all the sweeter ;)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so next chapter! I fiddled a lot with this one, and I hope it fits. I did change the tags - there is a rape scene where it's implied to be non-consensual, though it is more of a fantasy. If that is not your cup of tea please do not read!! This is your TW, so please be mindful of the updated tags. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

Damian’s jade eyes flashed at Dick in the dark of his room. Dick blinked, trying to wake his body. He felt sore and slow, but Damian didn’t ever come into his room unless something was wrong. Damian stepped closer, arms taut and lips pressed in a thin line. Dick rubbed the sleep from his eyes and pushed his hair back, looking at Damian expectantly. No explanation greeted him.

“Do you wanna stay here?”

“No. I just like to watch you sleep.  _ Yes _ , idiot.” 

Dick snorted, pulling up the covers and scooting back to make room. He knew how vulnerable Damian was, how truly scared he must constantly be of rejection, but he should know better than to think he couldn’t show an atom of gratitude. Damian slipped under the covers, and for the first time, Dick noticed that he was shirtless and wearing small black boxers. He felt his gaze hesitate on the slight bulge, but he looked away before his face could flush. _That’s odd. Damian usually slept very modestly._ Dick leaned back stiffly, looking up at the ceiling. Damian inched closer, as if Dick wouldn't notice how close he was getting. A smooth hand wrapped around Dick’s bicep and held tight, and Dick tried not to shudder as spiky hair prickled his ear when the teen laid his head on Dick’s shoulder. Dick felt himself harden, and he tried to think about literally anything other than the object of his obsession sleeping almost nude next to him. 

“Anything on that brooding mind of yours I can help with?”

“I can’t sleep anymore. I just dream about him.” 

_ Him? Oh, lovely.  _ Dick bit his tongue, trying to figure out what to do. He really really  _ really  _ would love not to talk about Damian’s hard on for Jason. But Damian clearly sought him out...and it was nice being so close to him. But was it really  _ so  _ bad to retract his earlier promise of “ _ I’m here for anything you need to talk about” _ ?

Damian’s low voice rang out in the silent room. “They always start when we are on patrol. He gets mad at me, but I bait him into it because I know what he’s gonna do, and then he shoves me against a wall. I’m fighting back until his hand holds me still, and then suddenly...I just want him. He’s growling in my ear, because he knows I want it rough, and then he’s pulling down my tights and pushing me to the ground.” Dick felt like stone, trying to filter the incoming words as just  _ words  _ and not as the very vivid picture Damian was painting. The problem was he could  _ see  _ it. That’s how he and Jason would fuck. It would be  _ mean _ ,  _ angry _ . 

Damian pushes up on an elbow, looking past Dick and getting lost in the retelling. “He’s telling me how I’m his dirty slut, that I’ve been drooling over his cock and he’s sick of it, sick of seeing me empty of him. And then he gives me  _ no prep.  _ He just shoves it in. And it hurts so fucking bad, but he tells me to take it and I do. I do and I  _ love  _ it. I’m pushing back, and he is so big and  _ mean  _ to me. I know it looks so bad, but I want that. I want him to use me, to  _ degrade  _ me.” Damian’s voice starts getting huskier, his eyes gleaming with excitement. 

Dick felt something in him snap, some shackle to his self-control break wildly. All plans to rein in his feelings and never tell Damian fly right out his window, and Dick felt like he was gonna explode if he didn’t do something. But more, Dick was  _ furious _ . That he had to sit there and listen while Damian talked about how bad he wanted  _ someone  _ else.  _ No. I’m done. You want it rough? That’s what you fucking want? _

“And then what? What’s so fucking good about Jason, Damian?” Dick pushed himself up, crowding Damian back into the bed. “What does he have that I don’t? You think he could fuck you better? That I couldn't  _ use  _ you? Do you know I’ve been thinking about railing you into the bed for weeks? If you like it rough so bad, you came to the right fucking bed. And you’re not fucking leaving.” Dick snarled, one hand going up to press hard on Damian’s neck, the other going to pull down his boxers. 

Damian gasped, pushing back into the headboard of the bed. His eyes looked frantically at Dick, and smaller hands tried unsuccessfully to break Dick’s hold. Dick was  _ sick  _ of it, sick of feeling jealous and thinking that Jason could fuck this kid any better than  _ he  _ could, tired of feeling that Damian woudln’t love what he could give him.  _ You’re gonna fucking love this. I just know it.  _

“Dick, wait, hold -” 

Dick laughed darkly, moving his head down close to Damian’s. “No, Damian. I’m not  _ going anywhere _ . In fact, I’m gonna stay here and fill you up, again and again.” Damian looked like he was close to tears, and Dick couldn’t stop the animalistic satisfaction he felt inside at seeing Damian give up. “In  _ fact _ , I’m going to make you forget his name and just chant  _ mine. _ I know you’re gonna love my cock, slut.” 

Dick angled Damian’s head into the pillow and propped his ass up, savoring how Damian just seemed to relent. He had shut his eyes and let Dick move him anywhere, completely giving himself up to his former mentor. He seemed pained, but hadn’t moved at all to get out of Dick’s hold. He looked small and conquered, and Dick realized that Damian really would let him do anything.  _ This. This was what loyalty meant to Damian. Anything. You’re gonna wish you never thought about Jason, darling.  _ He leaned back, admiring the sight before him. Damian was panting softly, ass up, and was bracing himself carefully. Dick could almost pretend in that second, that Damian came into his room for  _ him _ . Like this was what he wanted, what he  _ needed _ , and Dick was the only one who could give it to him. The fantasy started spinning, and Dick thought about how Damian must have been rutting in his own bed before he sought out  _ Dick _ , and then told him all about his dreams with  _ Dick _ that plagued his sleep. That he wanted  _ Dick _ to fuck him like that on patrol, that he wanted  _ Dick _ . Any mention of Jason was ejected into the stratosphere, and Dick reveled in this new turn of events.  _ Yes, that’s it. That’s what he said. I’m what he wants.  _ Damian wanted this, had basically been pushing himself onto Dick, and who was Dick to refuse him? Dick jerked himself, looking at how small Damian’s hole was. “I’m gonna make you a gaping mess, darling. All you’re gonna know is my cock.” 

He heard Damian grinding his teeth, and saw how every muscle of his was tense with anticipation.  _ Yes. Yes. This is it. Mine. You’re never gonna think about anyone other than me again.  _ Dick grabbed Damian’s ass, hands splayed out possessively. He spat out at Damian’s hole and relished the way it twitched with the foreignness of it all.  _ You pushed me to do this. You did this. You want this.  _ He pushed in insistently, feeling absolute bliss when he finally slotted into Damian’s tight heat. Damian was moaning, sweat gathering on his back, and Dick snapped his hips viciously forward. “That’s right, bitch. You love my cock.  _ Only  _ mine. Don’t ever pretend that you didn’t.” Damian’s moans started sounding like sobs, and Dick thrusted excitedly. 

_ Yes. He just wants me. He loves me. Not anyone else. He’s obsessed with me. He wanted this, he just didn’t realize he did. Wants to fill himself up on my cock all the time.  _

Dick jerked awake, pressing himself against the headboard agitatedly. He felt dazed, still half in his dream, and his head was spinning. He looked down and saw come all over his stomach and his sheets, and he tried not to panic at the fear that threatened to overwhelm him.  _ Did I...did I fucking rape Damian?  _ Dick dry heaved, holding his head, and felt his stomach surge. He ran quickly to the bathroom, bile rising in his throat, and he vomited, missing part of the toilet. He laid his head on the lid, and felt the most scared he had been in years. Sobs wracked his body, and he could not reconcile the fact that was  _ his  _ dream - that he came to. It came from  _ his  _ head.  _ Am I so fucking jealous that I justify raping him? Like it’ll convince him I’m better?  _ Dick heaved, hot breath fanning back the smell of his vomit.  _ And Damian just took it from me. He probably would, he trusts me. Loves me.  _ But not enough, a nasty voice in his head hissed.  _ Not enough.  _ Dick gave himself ten more seconds to cry, before he tilted his head on the cold wall.  _ Fuck. I can’t do this. No more seeing the kid. I need to stop this. I can’t see him or Jason. I need to figure this out, otherwise it’s just gonna fester. Soldier on and I’ll figure this out. It’s not real if I don’t act on it. Not real. Not real. I didn’t do it. I wouldn’t do that.  _

Dick sat still, trying to convince himself that that was true. Slowly, he pulled his thoughts into nothingness, and locked this even darker secret deeper inside his mind. Deep breaths filled his bathroom and he focused only on how even he could make his breathing. When he felt nothing but empty inside, Dick got up and flushed away his vomit, cleaned the mess around him, and headed into the shower. He stood in the cold water for almost an hour, shivering, before he cleaned himself up and headed out. He glanced outside, guessing that it was still very late.  _ Can’t sleep now.  _ Deciding to forgo pants, Dick walked out of his bedroom in search of a case folder to distract himself with. 

An hour filled with case study passed, and Dick finally started to feel relatively normal. Emptying your head and throwing yourself into work was actually a beautiful thing, and Dick was sorry he ever judged Bruce for doing so.  _ I’d send over a fruit arrangement and flowers, but then you might ask why I needed to empty my head. I’m not sure I can say that and not be obliterated on the spot by the universe if I utter it aloud. But hugs and kisses! _

Putting the case study aside, Dick hunted for some cereal. Silent feet padded on the kitchen floor while the acrobat looked in his small fridge for some passable milk.

His tracker pinged, and he saw Bruce asking Dick to answer him when he got the chance.  _ Ugh.  _ It had been a couple weeks since he had helped Bruce out and saw the rest of the family, and then promptly dipped out as soon as he could. He heard from Bruce that Damian had waited to see if he would come back, only to realize Dick had just left for Bludhaven as soon as he could. There wasn’t an easy way to respond to that, and Dick hoped that his lie that he just had a lot back at Bludhaven would work. And that he would text Damian. He did not.  _ But Damian wouldn’t tell Bruce about that. So I’m safe for a little longer.  _

Ignoring his night’s events and trying to stick to the facts, Dick let himself think about it shallowly. He didn’t want to see Damian anymore -  _ especially not now  _ \- and he felt a little bad, but not nearly bad enough to do anything. 

He  _ had _ received a couple texts from the Robin, and they were stiff but sincere. Dick had ignored them, blanching when he saw Damian’s contact photo pop up on his screen.  _ Even a stupid little contact picture of the surly teen makes my chest hurt. _ Damian had started off asking if Dick wanted to see a certain movie, or have lunch together, or just hang out. Days went by. Then he started asking if Dick could come help him train his flips, which did make Dick smile a little.  _ Worse liar than even Jason.  _ A week later, he had just asked if he did something wrong. Then, if he could do something to fix it.  _ You’re not the one who needs to be fixed, little prince.  _ The last one was just a simple picture of an old polaroid Dick had taken years ago; Dick had forgotten about it entirely, but his chest hurt when he saw it. He  _ did  _ remember that photo. He had insisted on taking a quick photo with the Robin, and pressed their faces together before Damian could scramble away. The photo Damian had sent was a picture of him sending a thumbs up next to the polaroid. Dick couldn’t help the exasperated fondness he felt when he got the text.  _ Like, what the fuck is that? I love it.  _ Then, any fond thoughts would torch, and he would feel insanely guilty because  _ he _ was pushing Damian to these emotional heights that caught Damian so far out of his depth. But Dick couldn’t text back, couldn’t interact with him, or see him, or think about him any more than very briefly.  _ This is for our own good. He’ll stop texting me, and then I can do my own thing over here away from him.  _ Dick wasn’t going to spend any more time thinking the ever pesky what,  _ why do I want to fuck him so bad I would jealous rape him _ , or how legal is it. Semantics were always up for debate, anyways. 

Dick sat eating, crossing his legs and trying to recover some of his energy. He hadn’t been like himself since his moral world had been annihilated, but he wasn’t there to do any of the work and figure out all the damage that had festered all realms of his life. How easy just  _ one  _ night had changed his life completely, had changed  _ him  _ completely.  _ No, no, no. No thinking zone. Let’s see. Something else....What is Bruce bugging me about? Oh, that’s right...Jason asked to be removed from the mission we have scheduled next month, that’s right. The one infiltrating that sex club. Said something about how he was interested in that anymore, and that he was trying to figure something out. Bruce clearly wanted to ask if I knew why, and if it was something he should be concerned over.  _ Suddenly, Dick felt exhausted. And then pissed off. Was  _ nothing  _ in his life somehow related to what he was actively trying  _ not  _ to think about? Why would Jason, who normally took those kinds of missions, all of a sudden beg off?  _ Unless he was trying to figure out his feelings for someone.  _ Dick felt nasty - like he wanted to punch something, or maybe  _ someone  _ with a shit eating grin and a penchant for being the bad boy.  _ Why does Damian love him? They are too much alike - too intense. I had thought they hated each other.  _ Oh, how Jason would get a kick out of this, Dick thought irritably.  _ Here you go, fuckhead. You finally beat me. You don’t need to force fuck our brother like I would. Golden star.  _

A loud thud echoed in Dick’s living room from his window, and he jumped up, coiled up and ready to strike. Dick crept forward on soundless feet, before Jason’s head popped in the window, swiveling to catch Dick’s tight face. Black wavy hair streaked with white joined a smirking chiseled head. Aquamarine eyes looked playfully up at Dick, and a roguish smirk pulled Jason’s normally rough face into a softer plane. Dick swore colorfully, moving forward to cuff his visitor hard on the head. 

“ _ Ow! _ What was that for?” Jason griped, feeling the back of his head tentatively. 

“What was that for?” Dick echoed, incredulous. “You don’t break into a vigilante’s house, no warning. You’re lucky I didn’t hit you harder.”  _ You especially. I did not want to fucking see you either.  _

“Well yes, unless you’re said vigilante’s darling brother. I boast certain exemptions, naturally. My my! What have I done to deserve the sight we have here?” Jason pulled himself out from the window, standing up on pale carpet with large dirty boots. 

Dick scowled, not bothering to hide his state of undress. He turned to go back to his cereal, missing how Jason’s eyes drank in the sight of him in tight boxers. “Take off your damn fucking shoes. I still intend to have light carpet in this apartment.” Jason pulled off his boots, wincing at the mix of dried blood and dirt that was already sinking in the carpet. Hastily putting the boots over the grievous stain and hoping Dick wouldn’t notice till never, Jason bounded forward unfazed. 

“What brings you to Bludhaven? And don’t say you were just in the neighborhood because you weren’t. You’re horrid at lying. I’m busy.” Dick said testily with a mouthful of cereal. 

Jason sniffed, pulling out a chair at the table. “What? Can’t just come to catch up like old times? I brought some vodka. And busy? You look like all you’ve done tonight is jerk it and then shower.” Jason grinned.  _ You don’t know the goddamn half of it.  _

“How is it that I’m the older brother and  _ you’re  _ the bad influence?” Dick said crossly, despite eyeing the bottle longingly. Now  _ that  _ would be a straight shot to the brain to distract him of his awful revelation. 

Jason pouted, inching closer. “Oh, fuck it. You’re lucky I’m in a terrible mood. Just for a little bit, and then you’re gone.” Dick said tiredly, rubbing his eyes. Jason cackled, scraping the floor bringing his chair closer. 

For the better part of the next hour, Dick talked to Jason about anything that didn’t directly reflect his current mutilated mental state, Damian, or Jason’s desires. The heady feeling of hard alcohol had energized Dick, making his smiles easier and his lips looser. Even though Dick kinda loathed Jason’s guts and imagined socking him in the jaw for taking Damian every couple of minutes, it was nice to catch up, seeing as Jason was one of the few people that had seen him through everything. 

“Since you’re basically Aphrodite in male form, I think you’re as best a resource as any in the love department. Can I ask you for some advice?” 

_ I don’t like where this is going.  _ Dick tried not to let his face sour, but he offered a grimace at best. He grunted after a beat, ignoring the way Jason was looking eagerly at him. 

Jason’s open face closed off momentarily. “Would you ever...fuck a guy? Like, ever?”

Dick cracked an eye open and took in the intense look Jason was giving him. Dick closed his eyes, and thought maybe he hadn’t had enough alcohol for this. That wasn’t advice. And not really like Jason needed it - Dick was very aware of Jason’s sexual history with men.  _ Why are you asking me?  _ If he closed his eyes long enough, maybe Jason would think he fell asleep…

Dick shrugged. “I guess. Haven’t really given it much thought, or been in that situation recently.”  _ That’s a lie. I’ve thought about forcefully fucking the shit out of Damian just a couple hours ago because I was jealous of you and I wanted him to want me.  _

“You say that like you haven’t pulled the gaze of even the straightest men. You can’t tell me you haven’t noticed. You’re golden boy. Have you ever done anything? Or...what about when you were..?” Jason furrowed his brow, looking put out. “You’re Bruce’s favorite, and not just because you were the best Robin to him. You know that, right?” 

Dick flinched. It felt like there were a hundred different fires going off in his brain at the same time and he was too drunk to really deal with it. He knew -  _ accepted _ Bruce’s love. It was simple, and it would just always be there. But it made Dick uncomfortable to compare himself to the other Robins, particularly Jason. They had never...never  _ talked  _ about it. Because time just didn’t allow for them to make that jump, and Dick had grown out of his shadow. Didn’t mean he couldn’t cast a fond look over the chasm, but he wasn’t bound to him in a soul sucking way that invalidated all others. It was just there. 

“I don’t think we need to talk about it - he never  _ did  _ anything. It just sorta, is there. That’s how I look at it.” Dick finished firmly, trying to dissuade Jason from digging more. Jason looked over, face tight, before he dove in. “Do you love him, too?”

Dick sighed. He looked up at the ceiling, briefly outlining the spackled patterns before returning to one of the hardest conversations he’d ever had that followed after one of the hardest nights he’d ever had. “Yes. But it’s not anything to be  _ done _ . It just is. That’s just how it’ll always be. Anyways, it’s not something I need to deal with. I have other things on my mind.”  _ Like fucking his son. I know, go figure.  _

“I already knew, at least on his part. I guessed on yours. I just. It helped to hear you say it honestly.” Jason said truthfully. Dick inclined his head in acknowledgement, wondering if Jason was gonna ask him some actual damn advice. 

“So like. What would be your type for men then?” Jason looked nonchalant, but Dick could see he was very curious. “Is the lane just dark, broody, and emotionally constipated? Clearly you like utterly broken men. But you don’t want to fix them.  _ You like it _ .” Jason whispered like they were in a dream he didn’t want to break. Dick glowered, disliking how excited Jason was getting. 

“It’s not one size fits all. For...men, I’d have to fall in love. Women I can just fuck if I want. What’s the damn advice you want? I don’t have any you need. You already fuck guys so I don’t really see where I come into the picture.”

Jason looked entirely too intense, leaning forward both his arms and cradling his shot glass. His eyes looked frantic, his foot tapping repetitively on the tile. But while his demeanor was loud, his voice was so soft Dick had to lean forward to listen. 

“I have this problem that I want to confront soon... Is it wrong to push your love onto someone? Morally, I shouldn’t. But I can’t help but feel like...like I really could give them  _ everything _ . Like they could love me back if they gave me the time. If they just  _ tried  _ me, I know I could make it worth their while.” Dick hummed, trying to ignore how similar their plights were. But they weren't, were they?  _ Damian loves you, you piece of shit.  _ "But even if they didn’t want it like...Like you just want to fuck them so bad, and you’d do anything even for just one night. I’d  _ prove  _ I could make them love it - love  _ me _ .” Jason finished, voice cracking. 

Dick looked down at his shot glass. How many more could he have before he just passed out? Did he just have a sign on his head lately that said - “please tell me emotionally ambiguous yet very significant statements with no real warning”? Because it sure as hell felt like it. It felt like Jason had scraped out Dick’s own shameful confession, and was parading it as his own.  _ What the fuck is he saying? Are you trying to justify wanting to fuck Damian to me?  _ Dick felt nauseated. Running away from your problems really didn’t do shit. They just came back, hidden, brandishing a vodka bottle and promising a good hangout. And then  _ bam _ , hit him with the  _ I know you’ve loved daddy bats  _ and then the  _ hey, I wanna fuck his son, can you give me the green light?  _ A truly devastating combo, Dick thought, everything considered. Dick felt ill, cross, and itchy. Like his skin just didn’t fit, like his whole  _ Damian problem  _ that he had been ignoring was tearing him apart at the seams and the universe was punishing him by having Damian love Jason and Jason  _ reciprocate _ .  _ And even better!  _ Neither knows, and it’s a dance around each other until they figure it out. And lucky Dick got first row tickets.  _ I could vomit.  _

“I would normally say follow your heart and don’t force anything. But, think about the consequences. Will it change your relationship entirely? Are they good with change? If they’re anybody in our lifestyle, they’re fragile inside. Some more than others.” Dick thought about how Damian’s broken parts were really just held together by pure will. He couldn’t think of anyone, save Jason, that was more fragile inside.  _ Fitting _ . “If you think you’ll be broken if they can’t love everything that you are back just as much, then maybe it’s just one of those loves that doesn’t leave, and that’s okay.” 

Dick felt like that was pretty good. It was mainly right, if only a little bit jaded. He wanted to deter Jason from launching straight into something with Damian... And hinting that Damian might not be able to give everything, (even though he knew that was an absolute lie) - that might undermine Jason’s confidence. It was a nice little seed of doubt, anyways. Dick just couldn’t shake the feeling that it wasn’t  _ right _ . That maybe they could work shallowly, but that it didn’t make sense in his head for the intensity both of them clearly were showing.  _ That just doesn’t make sense.  _ And Damian didn’t do anything partly. Jason must be responsive only now that he noticed Damian was so interested, and that obviously wouldn’t bode well long term.  _ See, I’m just being a good older brother. Nothing to do with the fact that the thought of them together literally makes me want to bash my head into a wall. And then bash their heads into a wall.  _

Jason looked pensive, hand propping his head up on the table. He looked achingly raw, like Dick had said something that cut a little too deep.  _ Jeez. Do you really like him that much, too?  _

Dick continued, trying to fix it before he dealt with a drunk, emotional Jason. “But I don’t think that’s bad. I’m a firm believer that we always have some loves in our hearts that are just  _ there _ . They might not be our  _ one _ , but they are still important. They make us who we are.” 

Jason looked unseeingly out at the table between them. Then he breathed out, laughing brokenly. “So maybe don’t try and seduce them tonight? Even if you know it’d be mind blowing?”  _ Tonight? Jesus Christ, it’s like he wants to make me punch him. While I lay here and think about you guys fucking? No, sir. Mindblowing? Look, pal. If I didn’t sense Damian would be mind blowing at sex, maybe we wouldn’t be here. We both wanna fuck the twerp. But I can’t let you do that.  _

“Maybe not.” 

“You’re killing me, Dick. But...I’ll think about it. You’re probably right. But I’m not nearly as goody as you are, so maybe I’ll take my chances one day. I really do love them. You never know.” Jason smirked without any real charm, pouring himself another shot. Dick looked away when Jason sighed sadly. Jason drank the shot slowly, putting the emotional armor he had shed back on. The chair scraped back, the table shaking, and the outlaw walked over to the couch. 

Dick grunted, trying not to dwell on the fact that he may have just messed up Damian’s chance with his love just because he was jealous. And Jason’s, for that matter. Dick felt small, like he had misused Damian’s trust and put down Jason for no reason. But then...Jason  _ had  _ said he may still go through with it. That he might talk to Damian, might  _ fuck  _ Damian. Possessiveness and envy were a nasty duo, and they wreaked havoc on Dick’s good will whenever Damian became involved since that fateful night.  _ Damian can’t love Jason. He can’t. Not over me.  _ Dick’s fists clenched and he gritted his teeth. Suddenly, Dick didn’t care if he messed things up.  _ The alternative feels so much fucking worse. You can’t have him.  _

“I’m gonna sleep, Dickie bird. You’re more than welcome to come join me, but only if you lose the boxers. Make a man go cross eyed trying to look at your giant cock.” Jason winked, starting to strip. 

“Oh, spare me with your platitudes.” _At least he’s back to normal if he’s mindlessly flirting again._ “If you vomit on my carpet, Jason Peter Todd, I will absolutely obliterate you.” 

“God, I get so hard when you talk dirty.” 

_ Save it for the brother you actually want to bone. Or don’t.  _ “If you choke on your vomit, please try and keep it down. I need my beauty sleep.” Dick passed the couch, mussing Jason’s raven strands. 

Jason snorted. Only clad in his cargo pants, Jason grabbed a blanket and settled into the couch comfortably. “I wish. Good night, Dickie bird. Love you.” He looked over at Dick, and aquamarine eyes betrayed how sincere he was.

Dick felt like he was playing whack-a-mole in his head, the annoying buttons shooting up insistently.  _ Jealousy. Possessiveness. Anger. Disgust. Shame. Guilt. Betrayal. Hurt. Lust. Love.  _ Dick smiled tightly, remembering that at the end of the day, he loved Jason no matter what.  _ Right? Yes. Even if he...yes. I have to. Jealousy, jealousy, jealousy. What an insistent button, and there are so many of you, too.  _ Jason looked at Dick intently, looking too vulnerable for the Jason Dick knew. This Jason looked more like the Jason he first met, with big shining eyes and an eager need to belong - to be loved. It looked odd on Jason’s hard face; his sharp face marked by stubble, a hard jaw, and scars.  _ Ok, shit. Hurry up, he’s gonna know something is up. I do love him, I do. Things are just hard.  _

“Good night, little wing...I love you, too.” Dick waved back, finally walking into his bedroom and collapsing into bed.

As soon as his body relaxed into bed, his thoughts threatened straying to certain emerald eyes and a certain snarky mouth. Tonight felt too emotional, too raw, not to release  _ something _ . Dick felt small. Sad, lonely, and this inescapable feeling that it didn’t matter what he did. He was jealous of Jason, betrayed that Damian would love Jason over him, ashamed that he wanted to defile Damian, gutted that Damian just didn’t love him back, and frustrated beyond belief that there wasn’t anything he could do about it. But most of all, he felt bad for not wanting happiness for Damian or Jason for that matter, even if it was morally grey as far as relationships went. 

  
_ I can’t keep doing this anymore. Only ignoring it leaves me so empty. This broken, aching feeling. I need to feel something. Something for me.  _ Dick felt destructive and wired, entirely too much energy to unleash on someone he knew. Besides, that would be difficult to keep casual, and any more was physically unbearable to consider at the moment.  _ Well, I need to fuck something. Consensually would be nice for my conscience, too.  _ Dick remembered the clubs he used to frequent several months back, and decided that maybe it was time to make an appearance. Keeping fantasies involving the steadfast, gorgeous, intense teen at bay, Dick distracted himself with thoughts of high heels and lipstick, each fantasy morphing into a new girl before the thought of darker skin and broader shoulders ruined him.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter! this is the last one before The Sex happens, so hold tight. I know this is a dickdami story, and don't worry, they are my main focus. But I didn't feel right just leaving Jason and Tim high and dry so they figure things out much later in this chapter. If you're not into that, you don't have to read and there will be the main dickdami climax coming next!
> 
> Dick continues to have one brain cell that is working overtime, but I kinda love that because he IS a really smart guy. It's just I think he can be really oblivious when it comes to feelings, especially when they're about him. Because I think for such an outgoing, lovable guy, it's hard for him to really "claim" love and see how important he really is to everyone. Plus, the guilt complex that Dick has feels really real, because this is something that goes against all his morals. ̶A̶l̶s̶o̶ ̶I̶ ̶l̶o̶v̶e̶ ̶w̶h̶e̶n̶ ̶h̶e̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶p̶i̶n̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶j̶e̶a̶l̶o̶u̶s̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶f̶e̶e̶l̶s̶ ̶m̶o̶r̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶c̶o̶m̶p̶r̶o̶m̶i̶s̶e̶d̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶l̶o̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶D̶a̶m̶i̶a̶n̶ ̶w̶h̶o̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶a̶n̶ ̶u̶n̶d̶e̶r̶a̶g̶e̶ ̶b̶o̶y̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶h̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶k̶s̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶s̶t̶ ̶d̶a̶m̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶p̶l̶a̶n̶e̶t̶. anyways, I really hope you enjoy! :)

Damian cut through the air, wind whistling behind him and limbs burning. With all his pent up energy, and frankly,  _ horniness _ , Damian was jazzed beyond belief and patrol was really the only outlet he could use and not feel morally despicable. Jacking off to your former mentor was exquisite, unfortunately, Damian admitted, but he felt like the amount of times he had been doing so recently surely was a ticket to burn for all eternity for obvious reasons. It had been several weeks since Damian had seen Dick, and it felt like he had years worth of time to reflect on his actions. Dick had pointedly ignored him during that family patrol, hadn’t answered any of his texts, and clearly just didn’t want to associate with him anymore. He had even sent proof that he had kept the polaroid close. Even  _ that  _ didn’t work. Damian felt so small. He had  _ always  _ had Dick before - often that was the only reason he kept going. But now that he didn’t have Dick, he had nothing. Truly nothing. He felt peeled back, as if his whole soul was ripping itself out to call out to Dick, and there was no one there. Regarding the fateful night on the mats, Damian knew that the distance and moderate subtlety of his arousal meant that Dick had probably assumed Damian was not aware of an audience. But Damian didn’t think Dick would deal with it that poorly. Clearly, the mere thought of his former Robin in a sexual context left Dick appalled. And while Damian had had more than plenty long nights sorely regretting his actions, he also couldn’t at the same time. It hurt  _ badly _ , unlike anything he had ever felt. But it also electrified him. Dick had  _ seen  _ him while he was living through a fantasy starring the very acrobat - he had even seen him  _ come _ . Sometimes, Damian’s mind would throw the annoying details like how Dick was clearly abhorred and hated it into some vacuum of space -  _ nettlesome little details, really  _ \- and Damian could instead focus on the very lovely knowledge that Dick had  _ witnessed  _ him fall apart without a touch. Yet, there were only so many times you could regurgitate and analyze the same scenario again and again before you craved more. 

Damian’s tracker rang and broke him from his trance. “Robin. The new shipments are arriving in Bleake Island’s main port. Explosive in nature parts for assembly. I am going to investigate with Red Robin. I already have the place set with traps. I called Nightwing in the area, so join him for the rest of patrol and keep an eye out for anything in the city. Batman out.” 

Damian grimaced and grabbed his caller. “Understood. Robin out.” So Dick was in the area? So interesting that he had not made an appearance. Damian took off running, jumping off of the nearest gargoyle, and dove into the sky, embracing the sounds of cars and passerbys before he grappled onto the next building in search of Nightwing. 

\--- 

Dick studied the nightlife stories below him. Couples walked on the street, snuggled up from the bitter cold that reigned in Gotham. Hot chocolate stands opened on corner streets, enticing children and adults alike. Cars jetting by honked and various sounds of happy chatter drifted up to its dark observer. He had been sitting there for a while, despite needing to finish his sweep in the western sector of the city for Bruce. 

Dick felt...stuck. Since seeing Jason, his mind was even noisier. Life became more mechanical. Everything except his nightly activities with whoever he had brought back for the night. Not like that had gone splendidly, though. Very rarely did he finish thinking of his bedmate.  _ But who’s keeping count? I’m not.  _ Still, he thought  _ generally _ he was doing a pretty good job, especially since he hadn’t had another repeat of a  _ certain _ kind of dream. Dick had pushed that deep within him, so much that he was getting better and better at forgetting it even happened. When he was home, he was blessedly never alone to sit with his thoughts. Dick felt like he should be embarrassed with how much he had come to rely on having someone else in his bed, but if it stopped him from dreaming like  _ that _ , it was a no brainer. Although...pushing emotional problems so deeply down with sex being the only outlet was eerily similar to a certain someone he knew  _ again _ . In the emotional realm, that was never a glowing comparison.  _ Hey, if the shoe fits.  _

  
  


Dick thrived off of placing parts of his life in easy little compartments; this allowed him to move freely between worlds of his with the same easy smile and light heart. Damian did  _ used _ to fit in one of the compartments -  _ see _ : the former partner, brother, and close companion. Easy enough. Until the little demon tore through such a nice compartment, katanas swinging and teeth bared, and made himself cozy in the  _ see _ : boy that Dick obsessively fantasied about, whom he may or may want to fuck the brains out of. His conscious  _ acknowledgment  _ of Damian’s true meaning to him had become insistently apparent over the last couple days. So, needless to say, Dick continued to try to keep Damian at a city’s length away and a world’s length away in his mind for as long as he needed. Dick stretched his neck, spurred on to try and finish his sweep before he risked running into the dark haired teen. 

“Greetings, Nightwing. I have been instructed to join you for patrol by Father.” Damian strode over to the formidable gargoyle Dick was perched on. 

Dick turned his head and offered a tight smile.  _ Well, there goes that plan. Damn you Bruce.  _ “Indeed you have...How’s it going?”

“You would know if you were in the area. Father offers little company and everyone save Alfred is unbearable to be around. So, rather...quiet.”  _ Lonely.  _

“Is that your roundabout way of saying you’ve been lonely and you miss me?” The words escaped Dick before he could shut his mouth, and he immediately regretted how easy those words had made their tension lessen.  _ Fuck, I’m not supposed to even talk to you.  _ Damian blushed and stiffened, pulling his cape closer around himself. 

_ Oh, I’ve missed you, so much.  _ All thoughts about how he had to avoid the youngest Wayne at all costs vanished into thin air. Dick smiled softly, loosening his vice like stance he had been holding since Damian had arrived. He knew he was playing with fire, but the ease in making Damian look even grumpier couldn’t  _ not  _ make him want to poke a little bit. It had truly nothing to do with the fact that the sight of the boy made every atom of his body gravitate towards the surly teen and his heart pound. Definitely not. 

“ _ Tt _ . No.”  _ Yes.  _

Dick’s smile dropped, and suddenly he looked away. “I’m sorry, little prince. I just...have something I need to sort through personally. I swear I’m working on it. It’s just something I have to work on - on my own. ”  _ Maybe then I can be in the same room as you without thinking about how good you’d look on your knees with my cock down your throat.  _

But while Dick’s words warmed Damian’s starved heart, his hawk eyes that drank in Dick’s form like usual, spotted something. A mark on his neck, just barely peeking out over his suit.  _ A...hickey?  _ Suddenly all reason for his heart to dance because Dick didn’t seem to  _ completely _ hate him vaporized.  _ Dick’s fucking someone else. And this time...this time it feels even worse. _ Damian knew a punch in the face would have hurt less.  _ Who? I need to know. I’ll kill them.  _ Envious rage ripped through Damian, and he tried to hold himself still so he wouldn’t throttle the stupid man that just insisted on grinding his heart into the dirt.  _ Why do you waste yourself on some worthless harlot?  _ But then Damian’s mind jumped, and he thought about  _ all  _ of who it could be. What if it wasn’t just some woman? What if it meant more?  _ One of his super girls? Drake? Todd? No. Tell me. Tell me.  _ Damian had to grind his heels into the concrete to focus. 

“Is that a hickey, Grayson? W- who are you having sexual relations with?” Damian ground out, his voice sounding like gravel. 

Dick startled, and furrowed his brow, leaning back. “Well, I - I mean, I don’t see how that’s relevant.” Dick tried to say sternly. Son of the greatest detective in the world standing in front of him and here Dick had the gall to be surprised. Flashbacks of a girl he had picked up from the bar only two nights prior, dark raven hair and smokey eyes that promised him a good time, came back to Dick. A truly gorgeous girl, frankly, whose long legs had locked behind his hips and whose lips had let loose the dirtiest things to Dick as he fucked her roughly. He was fucking her like a madman, trying to pour out all of his unspent energy into the screaming mess under him. Yet, just as soon as Dick felt like he was back in his groove, unbidden thoughts of darker skin, spiky hair, half lidded jade eyes, and sharp planes took form before his eyes and before he knew what was happening, he had come.  _ To Damian.  _ Damian, or rather his corrupted perception of Damian, had taken root inside his mind and would not budge. It didn’t matter what beautiful model he had brought home for the night, because every single time the body would morph right before him. Long legs would get longer and thicker, hands rougher, arms would morph into densely muscled extensions, curves became sharp and bony, pert breasts would flatten into a hard chest that ran into even harder abdominal muscles, pale unmarked skin would transform into a tanned expanse of scarred skin, and each time Dick would drink in this new form frantically. And then he would raise his head, and see Damian,  _ his Damian,  _ with secret emerald eyes that would glimmer under dark lashes and dark brows, with a hard jaw and a smirk that invited Dick to devour him, and Dick would shatter.  _ And this time, I know he wants me back.  _ Desire that ran so hot it burned would battle with the knowledge that he was effectively corrupting his partner, who had done nothing but be the most loyal family he had. No one trusted him so wholly, so blindly with their whole being, than Damian, who he now repaid by mentally fucking him into submission. Desire always won out, in the end. 

“How is that  _ relevant _ ?! Am I not deemed acceptable to confide in?” Damian looked hard, face drawing up with the very same passion Dick couldn’t stop thinking about on the daily. 

“ _ No.  _ You are the farthest thing from - don’t put words in my mouth. She wasn’t anyone, I’ve been feeling unlike myself lately and I just - I don’t know? Wanted to feel normal. She wasn’t anyone, if I was interested in someone for real I would tell you.” Dick mentally winced - that was actually very false. However, if it was anyone else, he knew he would tell Damian. 

He had sort of told Damian before of past trysts, even though the teen was easily the worst audience ever.  _ And that’s saying something. Even Bruce is better.  _ Romantic details or sexual retellings fell on the most vacant eyes Dick had ever seen. He might as well have been speaking in a different language, and maybe he was. Dick knew Damian wasn’t fond of “pointless love gossip” or emotions in general, but he would have thought Damian would care a  _ little.  _ The boy looked like a statue and offered truly nothing of value during such one-sided conversations.  _ Still _ .  _ This lie doesn't really count because it’s not really real if I just don’t ever say it.  _

Damian felt utterly heartbroken, imagining Dick making love with faceless women that would pull his eyes in a way Damian never could. It just wasn’t fair. His initial burst of outrage has fizzled out into a familiar bone aching sorrow and he looked away to gather himself.  _ No good to ruin my first chance to see him again. Don’t ruin this. You can’t change the past.  _

“Look. It’s really not a big deal, but I promise you there are far more important things than my crappy love life. You haven’t even told me who’s made you fall head over heels in love so if anything, you owe me a little more, squirt.”  _ Even though I have a pretty good fucking guess.  _ Damian looked very interested in his boots all of a sudden. Dick sighed. “Before we got B all up in our asses, let’s patrol. I think I heard that something might be going down on 65th street.” 

Damian nodded sharply and grappled out to the next platform, and Dick followed a second after. Despite their tension, they worked excellently together, picking up a chemistry that they had perfected years prior. Damian would always follow close behind, and Dick caught himself startling at how often he expected a little ten year old to be prowling behind him - not a lean and filling out seventeen year old who followed him with the same calculating attention. Various thugs with the hopes of mugging stray walkers or robbing a local bank were victims to the duo’s teamwork: Damian’s close and controlled hand combat would protect Nightwing’s dancing and powerful flips and kicks. The last mugging they had stopped led to Nightwing returning a pretty young woman’s purse, who had been gawking at Nightwing’s lean body that turned through the air with such deadly precision. 

“Oh my God, thank you so much!  _ Nightwing _ , holy shit. I am such a huge fan - you are my favorite superhero! And so  _ handsome _ ...wow. You’re even hotter in person.” she gushed. 

Damian couldn’t believe it, was the  _ entire world _ in love with Dick Grayson? One of these days one of his eyes would pop out from the pressure in his head. Irritation and prickly envy simmered under his skin, and he wondered if this was just going to be his life - watching everyone else watch Dick, too. “So, do you vigilantes have a rulebook somewhere that says you can’t reap the rewards of those you save..? Because I surely don’t know anything like that...” The woman slipped her arms tight around Nigthwing’s bicep and pulled his head down, planting a kiss on the side of his mouth. 

Nightwing laughed good naturedly and pulled his head back. “That’s very kind of you, miss, but my partner and I have other business tonight. We ha-” 

“ _ Hm,  _ yes we do,  _ Nightwing _ . Crime does not stop for even  _ you _ , ma’am,” Damian bristled, voice dripping with sarcasm. “It seems as if we will have to go, us  _ partners _ , and let you enjoy your absolutely meaningless evening.” 

Dick rolled his eyes at Damian and the woman glared, before sneering; “Funny, if I wanted to talk to the nasty Robin I would have.” She looked back at Dick, batting her eyelashes and wearing a sultry smile. “Well, I won’t keep you. But here’s my number, handsome. Do you guys have pockets? Sure doesn’t look like it - your uniform leaves absolutely  _ nothing  _ to the imagination.” She dropped her gaze to rake over Dick’s form appreciatively. “I promise you I’d give you the ride of your life. There’s this thing I do with my hips where I-” 

“As appealing as it is to hear you describe which I’m sure is  _ absolutely _ bland sex,  _ we were just leaving _ .” Damian seethed, pulling Dick into a run to grapple. 

When they were up on the rooftops, buildings away from the woman and her stupid parting waves, Damian finally relaxed. Dick snickered, bumping Damian with his shoulder. “You know, you can just say that you’re jealous. You’re pretty poor at hiding it, but I know you better than anyone.” 

Damian’s breath caught in his throat and he froze like a deer in headlights. He risked a glance over at Dick’s sharp profile, looking at how open his face was. The casual tone must hide the deep discomfort he must feel if he were to finally confront Damian over his love, and Damian tried not to think about how easy it would be to cry if Dick just came out with it and said it. 

“She was kinda hot, but not my type. Of course, now I know _your_ type now seeing as you’re all in a hissy fit.” Dick looked amused, before his words settled in the air. He fingered the hastily written number, thinking about how he really knew nothing about Damian’s type. _Jason and a hot blonde, that’s what I got to work with. I thought you didn’t like women usually? Ugh._ _Why did I say that? Am I looking to get hurt?_ Dick looked at Damian’s handsome profile, and he couldn’t help but think for the millionth time that he was just _perfect_. _I can’t think about you at all, it seems. Look straight. Don’t think about it. Think of the Penguin in heels and a thong. Yes. Perfect._ Dick felt his slowly stiffening cock flag, and he tried not to let his thoughts derail again. 

Exhaling, Dick reorganized his thoughts and returned to the conversation at hand. Since seeing Damian, Dick felt himself switching between falling into the same easy banter they had and realizing that ease was far behind him. Being around Damian on patrol was making it easier to forget his growing problem.  _ Problem. That’s what it is. I’m a fucking creep. He doesn’t even want me.  _ Dick’s happy face faltered, irritation tightening his face.

Damian felt like his brain was wading through jello, with how slow the cogs seemed to be turning. He frowned, before realization hit him. “Oh. No...She isn’t...I don’t find her attractive. How could she be? That cretin was an absolute airhead, ew.” Damian made a face at the thought. “Don’t be an idiot, Grayson.”

It was Dick’s turn to be confused. “But-? Huh.” Dick quieted.  _ I really thought he looked jealous. But then that would mean - no. Can I go one damn minute without - _

Damian felt like the night had been building up this easy intensity between them, and he desperately wanted it to keep going. Panic rose at the thought that their night was coming to a natural close. He  _ missed  _ him so much, had felt like he had been living recently with his heart torn out. Damian steeled himself, realizing he would need to show a little more of his hand if he wanted to keep Dick around like this.  _ Something has to give.  _

“I really missed you, Richard. I’m sorry...for whatever I’ve done. I get it if you don’t want to talk about it. I don’t say it enough, but I do miss you. Tonight was nice. Well, mostly.” 

Dick’s brows jumped at the quiet admission and he looked over at his partner. Damian looked insanely shy and even more embarrassed, but he wasn’t shying away like he so clearly wanted to. Here was this boy, almost a man, being so emotionally vulnerable for Dick, when he  _ never  _ was vulnerable.  _ Apologizing. When I’m the fuckup.  _

_How can anybody think you are anything less than perfect?_ There was a reason why the woman had called him the “nasty Robin,” and it was because it was widely known that Batman’s current partner was as snide as he was bad-tempered. The public thought so, and it was even more pronounced in the vigilante community. Dick knew Damian had very little friends, and that was mostly of Damian’s doing, since the only people he seemed to regularly tolerate were Dick, Bruce, and Alfred. Who he _loves_ is a whole different stupid situation, Dick thought bitterly. But while Damian had a fairly easy connection with Alfred, his relationship with Bruce was precarious. With Dick, however, Damian had let him in and time after time again showed Dick that his loyalty was unlike anyone else’s. Damian, the cold blooded ex-assassin, admitting that he had missed Dick, _without being prompted_ , and _apologizing_ , no less, while Dick had just skipped out on him recently? Dick felt his heart twinge painfully, and he tried not to tell Damian how much he actually loved him. Because that was what it was, wasn’t it? It had grown, but it felt like it had grown long before and Dick just hadn’t seen it yet. Growing deep beyond that wall, so beautiful and engulfing just waiting for Dick to finally stop and climb the wall. He loved this prince - this haughty arrogant boy that shielded himself from the world with sharp barbs and cutting words to hide how little he actually had. How little love he had been gifted, how little love he had been graced with, and yet here he was showing Dick he was a million times deserving.

Dick smiled softly, and brought his arm up to pull Damian closer. Dick moved his head to rest against Damian’s cheek, and he tried not to inhale Damian’s familiar masculine scent of sweat and pine.  _ Oops.  _ Dick tightened his arm around Damian’s shoulders, and looked over at him. Nervous jade eyes peered back under dark shadows and long eyelashes, and Dick closed his eyes before he could close the distance and kiss the very dark lips that had been haunting his mind for weeks. Dick knew he may never be able to tell anyone, much less Damian, of his taboo love.  _ But damn it, he doesn’t need to know the nature of my love. Just that I do.  _

“Don’t even think about it. Oh, little prince. How I love you. I’ll always be behind you, wherever you go in this great big world of ours.” 

Damian slotted his head onto Dick’s shoulders, and Dick hummed, kicking his legs over the ledge. The light of the city illuminated their faces with a warm glow, and the dark night offered a brief solace in a world that never seemed to stop moving. 

\---- 

Jason sipped his whiskey and looked at the rest of the club casually. He was dressed to the nines, in a dark suit that made his eyes gleam. So maybe there were pros to playing fiddle to Bruce again. The club was dark with low ceilings, with purple effect lights that painted the dark corners beautifully. Private rooms branched off to the side, large bodyguards outside and ever watchful. A large stage and pole laid out in the center floor, and dancer after dancer came and dug money out of watchers’ pockets. Jason was sitting farther back, on a leather couch that was positioned so he could see the entire floor plan as well as the exit. 

Initially, he wasn’t going to go through with the undercover mission. He was going to figure out if he could shoot his shot with Dick instead. How many times had he replayed the recent night...played it out differently?  _ A lot.  _ His personal favorite was one where he had kissed Dick right after he acknowledged he liked broken men.  _ I’m as broken as they come baby!  _ He had come there with the hopes of confessing his love and then getting fucked, but that hadn’t happened. 

The _minorly_ edited replays always went the same way. He would push himself into Dick’s lap, grinding right down on Dick’s cock he had tried so hard not to look at all night. Things would escalate, Dick would get rough and possessive, say casual things like  _ You’re the only one I want  _ or perhaps  _ None of them mean anything to me, I just want you forever _ . Jason wasn’t too picky, anything along those lines would do splendidly. Dick would pick him up and fuck him into the couch if they made it off the table first.  _ I’d give you everything if you just gave me a chance.  _

Manicured hands crept down his shoulders to his chest from behind him, and Jason instinctively shot a hand up to choke hold the visitor. An excited gasp met his ears, and he exhaled slowly when he realized there was no threat. A sexy long legged dancer came into his view. Platinum hair fell down on scantily clad large breasts, and a pink tongue darted out to wet dark full lips. Smokey half lidded eyes looked heatedly at him. A black g-string thong accentuated curvy hips and a full ass. Jason’s mood instantly soured.  _ God! Fucking boner killer. I’m trying to think here.  _

“Look lady, why don’t you sashay your ass over  _ there _ . I’m  _ busy _ and your pointy tits are like, in my fucking eyeballs.” Jason leaned around the dancer to catch a glimpse of the creep he was supposed to be keeping tabs on. Unsurprisingly, the woman left Jason with some colorful words and a nasty heel slam on his expensive shoe. 

Cradling his surely bruised toe and trying to keep his temper in check, Jason looked around to see his creep going into a private room with a couple of unlucky dancers.  _ Awesome. Waiting game.  _ The creep Jason was watching had a heavy hand in the drug ring in Gotham, but Bruce had gotten wind he might be interested in sex trafficking as well. Jason sensed that Bruce had struggled with whether or not to give him the job, but there weren’t many other gleaming choices. Bruce would have to significantly change his appearance, so  _ Bruce Wayne Caught In Underground Sex Club  _ wasn’t on headlines. The Wayne sons weren’t in the spotlight nearly as much, and Jason even less. He doubted anyone in Gotham really remembered him, much less would recognize him. Tim wasn’t really suave enough to look like he belonged in a club, and Dick was...well. Dick had been avoiding coming to Gotham recently, which did confuse Jason. He didn’t think he and Bruce were fighting.Tim and Dick always got along. The only thing Jason could guess was that Dick and Damian had some argument, or some miscommunication.  _ There’s no way Dick found...out, right? I don’t think so. That sure as fuck wouldn’t go down quietly. Maybe he just realized that demon brat is annoying for the first time and he wants a little break.  _ Anyways, Jason knew Dick wasn’t really an option. Bruce surely must want to see Dick again, but Jason knew watching Dick go undercover in a sex club wasn’t super high on Bruce’s desires.  _ Not mine either. That man wouldn’t leave without fucking someone. The whole club might riot.  _

Jason crossed his legs and sat back deeper on the leather couch ready to play the waiting game. He ran a hand up his face and felt stubble already coming in. When Jason wasn’t thinking about how truly nice it had been to hang out with Dick all night, he was haunted with the fact that he hadn’t told Dick and  _ nothing  _ happened when that was his whole point of coming.  _ Because he doesn’t love me back.  _ Those were times that only training or patrol could distract him and let him channel his hurt. His ribs ached, his arms shook if he held anything above his shoulders, his whole damn body hurt. It didn’t usually hurt like that, but maybe that was what slow heartbreak did to your body.  _ Whatever.  _

A waiter passed by with a refill of whiskey, and Jason pulled the bottle to stay with him. 

“Uh, sir, you can’t do tha-” 

“Save it for someone who cares, pencil neck. I’m gonna need another one of these soon, so pay attention. And bring me some damn peanuts.”

Jason laughed lowly when he saw the waiter scurry away.  _ That’s more like it.  _

“Harassing the staff here, are we?” 

Jason’s head turned, and he couldn’t hide the shock on his face. Tim laughed when dark eyebrows jumped and aquamarine eyes bulged. “What the hell are  _ you  _ doing here, Replacement?” Jason hissed, ducking his head back. He looked over his shoulder and checked his tracker - was Bruce pissed at him?  _ I haven’t lost the guy, asshole.  _

“Nice to see you, too. I was stuck on surveillance, and I figured that I would be more help here anyways. Plus, I wanted to...branch out a little I suppose. I’ve never been on missions like these.” Tim said, looking around. Jason took in Tim’s familiar presence. Tim wore a sleek grey suit that showed off how lean he was, and perfectly tailored black cuffs. A sharp, pretty face looked out underneath black strands of hair that fell over cerulean eyes. 

Jason would be lying if he said he didn’t appreciate Tim more than he let on. Especially for him, who was the black sheep of the family, it could be difficult to belong when Dick was Bruce’s favorite and Damian was the blood son. Not to say that Tim wasn’t a formidable fighter or didn’t belong, because Jason knew he did. Tim was just more subtle with his talents, and content with exercising his exceptional intelligence in the background. And despite a rough start, the pair did work well together. Tim had noticed exactly how Jason loved Dick almost immediately, and when Jason blew up, Tim had quickly said he only knew because he did too. Tim proved an excellent listener and quite insightful, and the best part was he held no judgement because he was in the same boat. An odd thing to bond over, but it eased the pressure Jason had been shouldering alone since he had been Robin.  _ And...he is a pretty good guy. Probably knows me better than even Dick.  _

“Well, okay, Timbo. It’s baby’s first sex club date. You’re gonna need to change your face, you look a little soft to be in here. Most people in here are older creepy divorced or soon to be divorced men. You’re looking a little bit like a pretty doe eyed nerd. Not  _ one  _ dancer has come up to poke your eyes with their tits because you look like you’re not even legal. You gotta look angry, horny, and like you have terrible emotional skills.” 

“So, like you?” 

“Exactly. I knew you were smart.” Jason watched Tim look self consciously at himself, making his shoulders broader and trying to open his legs more aggressively. “Okay, pretty boy. Why are you really here?”

Tim cracked a smile and steepled his fingers, catching the new dancer’s routine on the pole. “I wanted to see where you’re at...with Dick. I’ll be hon-” 

Jason hissed and darted forward, placing a large hand over Tim’s mouth. “Aren’t we being bugged?” He mouthed  _ Bruce _ . Tim shook his head, looking reproachfully at Jason’s hand. “It’s going back to my drive. Bruce isn’t listening. We can talk freely.” 

“Oh. Okay, then. Shoot, I guess.” Jason checked to see that his creep was still in that room before turning back to Tim. 

“Anyways, as I was  _ saying _ . I’ll be honest, I did feel like my time was ticking when I found out Damian loved him too.” Jason grunted in agreement. “I talked to Dick on that patrol, and I’ve thought about it for a while. He seemed so...distracted. Unlike him. He thought he was  _ dark _ , like he had this new urge that he never knew he could have. At first I...at first, I thought it could be me. Or you.” Tim added hastily after seeing Jason’s frown. 

“But I...I don’t think so. I basically  _ told _ him, just without saying it directly. You can guess how that went. But even just seeing him, smiling and oblivious. It did hurt, don’t get me wrong. But it almost hurt in a good way. Like I was lucky to see him, and think about him, and want him, and  _ love  _ him. Even if I’ll never get it back the way I want.” 

Jason snorted, splaying his legs out further.  _ Well that sounds like the same shit I got.  _ “God, you’re just like Dick. All golden hearted and shit. I can’t just compartmentalize that and just accept it. Not yet. Hell, I  _ just _ visited him and I was so close, Tim. I was  _ so fucking close _ .” 

“You visited him? When? In Bludhaven?”

“I was gonna go tell him, like  _ pour  _ out my heart and all that stupid shit. I brought alcohol, too. Kinda hoped that I’d tell him and then just something would click in his head. And he was in his fucking underwear the whole time!” 

Tim’s sympathy outweighed his envy. The universe did not give Jason anything easily. 

“He was honest about Bruce, like he  _ does  _ love him. But that isn’t his  _ one _ . I told him he liked broken men, and he didn’t argue.  _ That  _ was when I almost said it. ”

“What did you actually say?”

“I said I needed love advice. I I asked him if I should tell ‘them,’ even if I wasn’t sure they loved me back that way. And he seemed pissed, like he was trying to control himself.” Jason said, lost in remembering that night. “He said to be careful, that I shouldn’t force it. That it was okay to just love someone, and that sometimes that’s just the hand you got.” Jason finished quietly. 

Tim looked sad, and slowly put a hand on Jason’s shoulder. “Did you stay the night?” 

“Yeah. I was too drunk, and fucking sad. I almost kissed him. I almost  _ told  _ him, after all these years. But the worst thing was when he was going to bed and I told him I loved him - when he did say it back, I felt so fucking good. Like it was so worth it. Even though I don’t know what the fuck I’m gonna do now. I might still tell him, I don’t know. I  _ don’t know. _ ”

Tim frowned, and he looked around to make sure nobody was listening still. “Jason, I don’t think this will ever go away. But I don’t want it to - I know you don’t either. And maybe we can still tell him. But not yet. I’ve been thinking...I think we cut Damian out too quickly,” Tim said. Jason choked loudly. 

  
  


“You noticed that Dick hasn’t been coming around Gotham, right? We’re good, and he and Bruce are as well. He deliberately chose to go on patrol with me over Damian, which was surprising. I’ve thought about it awhile. Jason, I think Dick found out about Damian. And then he said that he’s ‘darker’ than he thought? What if he wants Damian back?” 

Jason heaved, reaching to finish his whiskey off. “Hey! Yes, you, pencil dick. Bring me that goddamn bottle now. I need to erase the last ten seconds of my life.” Jason growled over the booth, and a skinny timid waiter bolted forward with a bottle of whiskey for Jason to take. 

“Do not fucking mess with me. Literally why would you even  _ think  _ that?” 

Tim looked affronted, pushing himself up to rest on his knees. “Hey,  _ I  _ don’t fucking like it. I fucking hate it. But it makes sense! I know there’s something up with Dick, and it has something to do with Damian. I  _ know _ I’m right.” 

Jason raked his hands through his hair, looking more frustrated than Tim had seen him in awhile. “That is the most revolting thing I’ve heard in a very long time. I’m fine with  _ us  _ wanting to fuck our brother. Damian does not get brother fucking rights. Dick picked  _ him _ ? No fucking way.” 

Jason sank back into the couch, checking to see his target was still in the private room before he downed more whiskey. “That’s like. Total ass. Like  _ asshole _ . Like fucking  _ giant  _ asshole.” Tim nodded tightly, like he was trying very hard to keep himself together.  _ Probably for me, since I’m taking this so nicely. Fuck, man. Everything is so fucking shit.  _

“Okay.  _ Fuck!  _ I need some time to figure all that out. I still might tell Dick.  _ You never know. _ That’s what’s been going through my head constantly. I’m gonna punch the shit out of that fucking brat. I wonder why Dick thinks Damian would make him happy. I should be so mad at Damian, and I  _ am _ , but I just am thinking about Dick again. We got it bad, Timbo.” 

Tim laughed joylessly, nodding. “Yes, we do. But it hurts because it’s real. I’ve had to do all my mourning  _ alone _ before I even saw you.”

“I know I could get him to love me. If the timing just worked...I could have.” 

“Uh, me too. But you don’t see me crashing into his apartment to fuck him. I play my cards a little more patiently than you do.” 

“And that's worked so gloriously, hasn’t it?” Tim knocked Jason’s shoulder irritably in retaliation. 

Jason sighed deeply, looking torn at the seams. Tim leaned into him and surveyed the people around them while Jason collected himself. Jason shut his eyes tight and balled his fists, holding his body taut before finally slumping. He looked tiredly over at Tim and Tim crinkled his eyes sympathetically. They sat in a companionable silence for several minutes, shoulder to shoulder, drinking and letting everything sit in. 

Tired of looking at the same room with no movement and feeling his heart ache, Tim glanced at Jason to see how he was doing. Suddenly, Jason jolted excitedly, and his dark eyes lit up dangerously, catching something behind Tim’s back. Before Tim could turn and see, Jason smiled crazily. 

“Don’t be mad, darling brother. You have left me with some very troubling information to process. One might even go as far as to say my heart is broken, and I have renewed anger issues. I am said one.” Jason said with a flourish. “ _ So _ , I’m going to go and digest that over some sex. You’ve had a little more time than me to mourn our unrequited love.” Tim gaped at Jason, who was getting up, straightening his collar, and fixing his hair. “Take over the mission for me? If the sex is good, I’ll get his number for you. Thank you, Tim. Really. But I  _ really  _ need to go make a bad decision before I implode or go cry at Dick’s feet.” 

Tim watched Jason stride over to a male dancer that was new on the floor. Dressed in black tight slacks and a black tie over his chest, the dancer did look an awful lot like Jason’s preferred choice in partners. Lithe but muscled, confident, and dominant. Tall, dark hair, and blue eyes. Tanned skin. The dancer  _ was _ relatively handsome. But it was a cheap replacement, considering. He was truly no  _ Dick _ , but he sure could be if you squinted. Tim squinted.  _ Eh.  _ Tim squinted more.  _ Hm. Maybe I wouldn’t mind getting his number.  _

Tim watched Jason saunter up to the dancer, saying something that made the dancer laugh. Jason’s broad frame leaned forward to say something presumably lewd in fake Dick’s ear. Wiry hands came to bracket Jason’s ass, and he stepped closer. Tim narrowed his eyes, glaring at Jason, who winked back at him and blew a kiss.  _ Asshole. Don’t forget to not say “Dick” so loudly when you come like last time, idiot. I never heard the end of that.  _ Tim rolled his eyes, settling down to watch the target’s room and be ready to corner him whenever he left that damn room. 

_ I’ll let Jason ride this hurt out. He’ll come around. I’m glad I’m not doing this alone.  _ Tim poured himself a shot of whiskey.  _ But now I know, right? I still love Dick. And that’s okay. Just like Dick said. That’s just what you get sometimes. And I don’t regret it. Even when I probably should.  _ _ I hope Damian's worth it.  _


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright peeps, we finally got the Sex chapter. seeing as our boys are insanely dramatic and emotionally all over the place, I think that translates quite nicely into the bedroom. My interpretation Dick also is that he is massive, absolutely packing in ze pants, and I will not be taking any criticism at this time. I definitely go back and forth between Damian having a praise kink and a degradation kink, but this time I was feeling a little spicy. So if dirty talk ain't your thing...well. This is your warning :D 
> 
> I hope I was able to capture the intensity that's been building, so I really hope you like it. As always, I am an absolute slut for comments. Without further ado, I give you too many words about my favs fucking tee hee
> 
> edit: i accidentally deleted an important line at the end of the chapter when i copied it over here which bugged me to no end when i realized so i just updated that. back to the horniness!

Following the duo’s pleasant patrol night, Dick had made an effort to come around Gotham a little more over time, which gave Damian a mixed bag of emotions. Dick would help out on patrol or visit the Cave, usually at Bruce’s beckon, but he never would come back to the manor or stay alone with Damian for long. On one hand, there was a deep sense of happiness that Damian basked in with more of Dick’s attention, but Damian was also wired up tighter than ever around the older man. As interactions became more frequent, Damian’s addiction became ever so pressing, and he wondered if he was just slowly killing himself by constantly curbing his desires. Damian could lose his train of thought with just a glance at Dick’s profile, the sound of Dick’s voice, or the way that he flew so gracefully during battle. The way Dick could incapacitate a thug so easily, flaunting his power so _freely_ ...well. Nobody couldn’t say Damian didn’t have a capability kink. Damian was eternally grateful for the jock cup of his uniform even if it was rather uncomfortable. Batman had snapped at him more than once for his lingering stares, much to Damian’s embarrassment. _You can’t say anything._ Damian thought moodily. _Don’t ask, don’t tell - isn’t that how it goes?_ It started to feel like every second Damian agonized how quickly he was falling apart for no reason. 

On the flip side, Dick had also kept Damian at a physical distance, which was slowly starving Damian. Damian wasn’t very fond of touch in general; Dick was the only person who even tried to touch Damian normally. Despite being so averse to touch in general, Damian did feel like he was going to die if he wasn’t physically tethered to Dick. Even notwithstanding his romantic attraction to Dick, Damian missed little companionable touches that would be easy and soft on his sensitive skin. Dick was obviously trying to ignore seeing Damian rutting on the mat like some dog, and move forward with some new boundaries to preserve their companionship. It was more than he deserved, Damian knew. But it was _almost_ more painful than Dick’s absence. At least then he didn’t have to live through Dick trying to smooth that part out of their relationship every second. _That stupid fucking night, of course I had to ruin us like that._

Damian didn’t feel like he could take this limbo anymore, selfishly drawing in as much of Dick as he could while Dick always kept him at a distance. _Just trying to cover how appalled I made him. Only Dick would be so kind in his disgust with me._ Damian felt a building tension in him that was going to snap soon, and he’d rather lay out his love gracefully and accept judgement in a way that would hopefully persuade Dick not to vault out of his life like he deserved. 

Damian knew Dick was probably finishing up a sparring session with his father. Bruce was training Dick’s close hand to hand combat to be even more controlled, while Dick was offering tips to the burly vigilante as how to move lighter and quicker. Padding down the stairs to the cave, Damian tried to slow his pounding heart and try to gain _some_ control over his body. Irritation prickled under his skin. Here he was, sweating and flushing like some schoolgirl - _him!_ Most of his time spent pining, he didn’t stop to think about how devastating this knowledge would be if everyone knew how much of a mess he was. _The Son of the Bat, the heir to Al Ghul demon legacy, trained from birth to be the perfect assassin, and yet here I am, a bumbling heartsick mess. What would Mother say of me now? No, don’t be dramatic._ It wasn’t trivial, Damian knew better than to entertain that. It was _Dick_ . Dick was everything - an exceptional fighter - the most formidable acrobat in his tier, truly intelligent despite his occasional obliviousness, and more, he was the best person Damian knew. Dick had pulled him from the darkness when he had all the reason to turn his back on Damian. _Truly, I could not have found a more suitable partner. Not even Mother could refute that._

Grunts echoed throughout the cave, Dick’s deep pitch and Bruce’s baritone growls. Damian leaned over the staircase and watched the two most important people in his life spar. 

Dick brandished his escrima sticks, opening his shoulders and baring his teeth in a grin. Bruce shot forward, arms locked to grab Dick and flip them, but Dick ducked his shoulders and brought his bars down hard on his opponent’s back. Bruce braced his back and hooked a leg to pull Dick’s feet from under him. He hauled Dick up by the shoulders and cuffed him across the jaw, curbing his punch so as to not shatter Dick’s jaw. Dick pulled up strong thighs to push out between their heaving bodies and thrusted backward, flipping his body in a quick arc with two solid kicks to his former mentor’s chest. 

Dick laughed, spitting out blood on the mat and sinking into a defensive crouch. “Tit for tat?” 

“Your side steps are too close. You leave too little space between you and the opponent - you’re not focusing.” Bruce’s gravelly voice accused.

“Oh, how I missed your glowing compliments. If I close my eyes I can just imagine I’m in my scaly green panties again.” 

White lenses narrowed and Bruce frowned, pulling himself into a careful stance, cape spilling around his boots. 

“They were not _panties,_ Nightwing.” 

“No? You could've fooled me. I’d put them on again, but well. I’ve gotten a little big.” Dick winked, before shooting across the mat, running into a flip landing over Bruce’s shoulders with a thud. Black kevlar with blue accents tightened across Bruce’s dark grey chest, and Dick tried to pull Bruce’s weight down backwards. Black gauntlets flashed upwards in efforts to unlock Dick’s powerful thighs, and Bruce’s feet staggered under the new weight. Escrima sticks pointed threateningly under Bruce’s chin, and Bruce let himself fall backwards to tumble with Dick. Larger muscled thighs bracketed Dick’s leaner frame and Bruce’s giant cape seemed to envelop them. Hard thighs wrapped around Bruce’s torso, and Dick closed his hold on Bruce’s neck to counter Bruce’s bearing down weight. 

“Tie?” Dick panted, smiling toothily. Sweat dripped from Dick’s hairline, tan skin flushed with exertion, and Damian felt his pants get tighter even from his high vantage point. Bruce pulled his head back, looking over Dick’s taut body slowly. 

With a nod of his head that was a bit too delayed, Bruce rolled his eyes, moving to get up. 

“You would do well not to forget what I said. You’re big but you’re leaner than I am - use it to your advantage. But - decent session overall.” The Bat gruffly voiced, earning a breathy laugh from his former ward.

“Why, to think communication is your weakest point. I learned from the very best, I’ll pass on your compliments.” 

A ghost of a smile danced on Bruce’s hard face, and his eyes jumped up to Damian before he headed towards the Bat Computer on the other side of the cave, cowl headpiece in arm. 

Damian’s gaze rested on Dick’s sweaty form, lounging on the mat. Wet hair fell in front of ice blue chips, and Dick’s roguishly handsome face went slack with exhaustion. 

“Hi, little prince. Nice show?”

_If only you knew._ Damian had always been aware of the charged looks his father would send Dick in certain encounters, although he was unsure exactly how aware Dick was. The crackling of tension that seemed to run off in waves from his father’s body during a passionate engagement with Dick was unfortunately for Damian, very telling. He chalked it up to another one of the many hearts Dick had turned inside out and tethered to him without really realizing. His father did not fall easy. _Neither do I._ He had his assumptions however, that there was a tension between Dick and his father before that was more readily obvious, especially seeing how devastated Dick had been when he had thought Bruce had died. He wasn’t sure if anything had ever...transpired, but it didn’t seem like that mattered. This knowledge didn’t bother him as much as it just felt unreal to him - like it was from a timeline that he couldn’t really understand. He often forgot that Dick really had such a long history with his father. But he could see it in the few times they interacted, the natural ease and deep loyalty they shared. Genetics could be really pointed sometimes. _Apple doesn’t fall far._

“I actually wanted to talk with you about something. Is there a way we could discuss so in private?” Damian rasped out, clearing his throat and straightening his back. Head held high, he tried not to think about how quickly everything he had could disappear with what he was going to confess. But he _needed_ to, he couldn’t never tell Dick. And who knew how long Dick would stay? He was coming around more now, but that could change quickly. Right? Whatever Dick wanted - that was what he would give. Simple as that. _So why do I feel like I could vomit at any second?_

Dick knitted his brow, bringing a hand to slick back sweaty hair while his other hand propped him up into a crouch. “Okay. Can I shower first, and then we can talk right after?” 

“That’s fine, Grayson. I’ll just wait.”

Dick nodded his thanks and walked to the showers, taking off his gauntlets before disappearing behind the rocky wall. Damian mentally blocked any thoughts about what state of undress the acrobat would be in, or what he would look like, or how the water would look dripping down his abs, or how easy it would be to possessively rake his hands over the older man’s body, leaning up into a heated kiss that would - _No._ Not that. Damian moved to sit on a nearby bench, breathing deeply and tried to go through the various pieces of the Batmobile and their functions to focus - his new favorite distraction. _Electrified bumper. Function - incapacitate enemy charging the vehicle. UV setting of headlights. Function - useful for detecting various fluids and substances...._

Damian didn’t know how much later it was when Dick finally padded out in bare feet from the showers, dressed in a black shirt that stretched tight across his chest and grey sweatpants that clung to narrow hips and teased the v of his stomach. The pants cuffed at the bottom and Damian caught himself looking at the simplest of things, like how sharp Dick’s achilles heel was or how prominent his ankle bone was. A mess of wet hair flopped in Dick’s face, fanning out to his ears and getting shorter near his neck. Damian felt his mouth go dry and his heartbeat pick up. It really was a testament of his discipline that he did not do anything hasty when Dick looked like this. _You sure don’t make it easy, do you?_

“Let’s go sit down near the waterfall. The air feels cooler over there.” 

Damian nodded dumbly and scrambled up, trying to catch up with Dick’s longer strides. 

“Ah, okay. Hit me with it, baby bat. I’m all ears.” Dick pulled a knee up to lock his arms around. _Okay, good start._ Damian sat down stiffly, and Dick scooted back quickly when Damian sat a little too close. _Never mind._

Damian stalled, peering down at the waterfall, following its path up to the bridge near where the Batmobile parked proudly. The sharp rocks splashed the occasional water droplet up to Damian’s feet. Fluorescent light panels swayed with the gentle breeze and reflected back on the escaped water droplets. _Okay. This is for real. Take a deep breath, and don’t fucking lose him._

“Very well. I don’t know how to do this without just saying it.” Damian admitted, chancing a look at the way Dick’s face became serious so fast. “I am sure you are aware that I hold you in a...exceptionally high regard. I believe wholeheartedly in your abilities as a vigilante...as fit for the cowl and in your own right, and I recognize that your very being is truly _good_ . I quickly realized I had initially misjudged you in my insecurity, and I expect you know that it was difficult for me to lose you as a partner, even though I got Father back. We _were_ the best, Richard. I haven’t the slightest doubt in my mind as to your competency in any aspect.” Damian spoke quietly, slowly, as if savoring each word before he let it come into fruition, to be _real._

Dick waited with baited breath, feeling like there was a “but” coming up. Panic began to rise in him and from the seriousness of Damian’s face, Dick felt like Damian was about to confront him about something painful. _There was no way he could know, right? How could he? I’ve kept my distance. There’s no way he could know._ Damian seemed as if he was weighed down by several tons, every word ground out with some difficulty. Fear raced through Dick, and he felt the back of his neck burn. _He must know. He found out, and he wants to set new boundaries or never see me again or tell me before he tells Bruce or Jason or -_ Dick’s jaw felt like it was gonna shatter in a million pieces, he was holding it so tight. Dick suddenly felt trapped, like the large Cave wasn’t big enough, like he was going to suffocate in that damn hole in the ground with Damian’s disgusted face his last thought. He tried not to romanticize the idea of swan diving into the waterfall to escape the object of his depraved fantasies confronting Dick for his perversions. 

Damian exhaled deeply, wishing his dark turtleneck could swallow him up and shut him up before he could ruin everything with just a dark confession. 

“And yet, my feelings towards you are not entirely fraternal...it is staggeringly raw, this devotion I hold for you. You are the only person I have ever wanted. I recognize how uncomfortable that must make you, but I feel as if it is imperative for me to finish this honestly with you, for all you have given me when I have deserved nothing. To me, you hang the sun and the stars, you are where my purpose begins and ends - you have taken root in my heart and it seems foolish to pretend that it could be anyone but you. _It has always been you_ . For years, since I can remember. It will _always_ be you, Richard.” Damian promises quietly, _fervently_ , and dark emerald eyes finally lift up to look Dick in the face. 

Dick looks like he has been punched in the gut, like someone - _Damian_ , has wrenched his hand into Dick’s ribcage and pulled out his organs. Shock had made the sharp planes of his stony face even harder, and a choked gasp leaves him before he snaps his mouth shut. Damian feels his face crumbling, his resolve falling, because he _knew_ this would happen. He didn’t dare to hope anything except at best a kind rejection, but it seemed like he broke Dick with this confession. It is so much harder when it is actually happening, and Damian realized nothing has ever hurt more than Dick being appalled with him. _But this is my last chance, maybe ever, to tell Dick what he has given to me, even if it is dark and selfish and wrong._ Ignoring a hot prickling behind his eyes - _because a Wayne does not cry,_ Damian dug his nails into his thigh and tried to get everything out before Dick could blow up at him. 

“I am sorry, but I could not live longer not telling you. You are every thought of mine - you are my love, in this life and every other life. I fear you may believe this is an ill-founded crush, but I cannot shake the feeling in my bones that I was simply destined to love you, Richard. You own my body, my soul, and my heart.” Damian stopped, trying to not let his voice break. He risked grasping Dick’s larger hand hanging limply, and held it to his pounding heart and willed Dick to feel how devoted Damian was, would always be. “No one else does - it will always be _you_ , beloved.” Dick still looked paralyzed, but Damian could see his barely seeing ice eyes shift towards his hand laying over Damian’s heart. 

“If you want me to leave, or not contact you or - God. I will do whatever you want, anything. I do not know what I have without you, but I can love you from afar if you so wish. You’d never need to see me if you want, but I _will_ protect you from afar, I- I cannot live without you.” Damian finished quietly. His dark brown skin looked even darker under the weight of the shadows that seemed to engulf him, claiming him as their own; glimmering eyes shone desperately out at Dick. Damian’s dark lips that were normally pulled into a frown looked chapped and open. His thick eyelashes hung dark under his eyebrows, and the deep red flush of his face proved how passionate this hurricane of emotions had been, tearing up through him and out in between them. 

Dick’s mind had been short circuiting, every thought or sentence obliterated in the wake of Damian’s confession. In no universe or world had Dick contemplated the mere thought, that Damian would be in love with him - _would return his newly discovered feelings_ . _What happened to Jason? Was he not..? That couldn’t be. But he just said it! He just fucking said it!_ To discover the wall’s presence in his mind stopping him from considering Damian as more, mere weeks before Damian finally divulges he has been pining for _Dick_ for years? The ache he had felt in his soul in preparation of Damian’s disdain had morphed into an electrifying want, shooting out into his veins, breathing life back into his rigid body. Dick’s eyes snapped to Damian’s, and he roughly pulled Damian’s shirt close. 

Slotting their lips only a breath away, Dick drank in Damian’s crumpled face. Tears were falling slowly down high cheekbones, and Dick used his other hand to hold Damian’s face still. Jade eyes looked bewildered at Dick, swirling with anguish. 

“You beautiful fucking boy, you have absolutely no idea.” Dick breathed out in wonder, eyes darting down to Damian’s dark lips. 

“Do you have any idea what I want to do to you? What world in me you have unlocked with your love? I want all of you, everything. I want to give you everything, I want to ruin you and put you back together again, I- God. Damian, my little prince, I-” Ice blue eyes shut quickly, and they opened with such an agonized look that Damian felt like his neck snapped in emotional whiplash. 

“I love you, you idiot. But I _can’t_ \- do you understand? Do you see why I _cannot_ love you - why there are so many reasons this is wrong?” 

Damian rarely held his face in something different than a tight frown, so it looked especially foreign when his jaw dropped and he gawked at Dick, wet eyes piercing. 

He stuttered, seemingly unable to process everything that was transpiring. “ _You reciprocate and you’re fucking saying no?_ ” Damian said disbelievingly. 

“I was your mentor! Basically your fucking brother! Your father is my...fuck! What the fuck could I even tell him? The amount of moral barriers that are between us are astronomical. You are a _kid_ , you say years as if you have loved me since you were ten!” Appalled blue eyes locked with Damian’s as if pleading for Damian to disagree. Damian’s eyes flitted away embarrassedly, his shoulders hunched. That was answer enough. Dick breathed out, trying to stabilize his frantic thoughts. _Ten years old? I am more than ten years older than you._

“God. I don’t know what to do. I could have been _grooming_ you without realizing it. I _do_ love you - and it fucking scares me because it has consumed me in a way I’ve never felt before. But it’s... _wrong_ , Damian. I can’t.” Dick choked out. 

“ _But you do! You can!_ How is this wrong? You have never influenced me - my love for you happened nevertheless. Do not insult me as to doubt the depths or the truth of my words, Richard. Do not persecute yourself blindingly on the basis of morals when you are the very moral beacon I turn to.” Damian spat out, fiery jade eyes flaming. His eyebrows knit angrily, Damian looked enraged, and Dick wasn’t used to seeing his face twist so passionately without his Robin uniform on. “The way you make me feel...I would walk to the ends of the earth to see you, till my body breaks and the fire of my soul dies. Your argument is _groundless_ .” Damian growled. Fury warped his frame, and Dick distantly appreciated how Damian could look so breathtakingly murderous, and that _it just made it hotter_. 

“No.” Damian repeated harshly. “I will not let you take this from me for your ill-founded excuses. How can my devotion be wrong, my love? _Our_ love - when that is the reason my heart beats?” Damian leaned in, hot breath fanning out onto Dick’s face. Emeralds looked heatedly at Dick’s lips, tracking along the rest of the acrobat’s face reverently. 

“No, beloved.” Damian echoed. “I have always belonged to you. Maybe you’ve always known this. Finish it. _Make me yours_ . _Take me._ ” Damian demanded, looking fiercely at Dick. A deep brown, scarred hand grabbed a larger, lighter hand for the second time, taking instead of giving, and placed it on Damian’s heart once more. Damian’s heart hammered, body hot and wired. He brought Dick’s hand down, slowly, dragging down until he hovered over the bulge in his slacks. As soon as Dick’s hand stilled, Damian let go, hovering his hand over and releasing any pressure. Watching Dick’s stormy gaze, Damian leaned in and brushed his lips softly on the side of his former mentor’s neck. The final jump would be Dick’s to make, to _take_ , and Damian waited to see if Dick would make the leap with him. 

Dick waited several beats, trying to decide one of the hardest decisions of his life. His hand pulled back after a beat, until Damian’s quiet pained gasp filled the space between them and Dick reconsidered. _Please. Please, don’t leave._ Dick’s hand slowly came down, gaining purpose until he finally grasped Damian through his pants possessively. Damian choked, looking down at how large Dick’s hands rested over his stiffening cock. Dick surged forward, carding a hand through Damian’s raven hair, and crashed his lips into Damian’s. Damian moaned, arching into the kiss, savoring the way his entire body seemed to blaze so quickly. Dick started crowding the younger man, broader shoulders engulfing Damian’s submitting frame. Warm lips and hotter breath clashed together, and Damian snaked a hand up to grab Dick’s nape, pulling him hard closer. Damian’s moans grew louder and more desperate, vibrations only barely covered by Dick’s nipping teeth. 

“Dick,” Damian panted, “please.”

Dick’s head already felt like it could explode with the onslaught of bliss, but hearing Damian, who he wasn’t sure he had _ever_ heard utter that word, beg Dick mere seconds in…? Dick felt like he could come right there if he thought about it long enough. _I am the only one who can bring this boy to his knees. Not Jason. Not anyone. Just me. The ways I am going to ruin this vision of a boy_. 

Possessiveness tore through Dick’s body, burning at the thought that Damian could have been anyone else’s. Anger, that he ever had to _consider_ anyone else having Damian. He wanted to strip Damian bare of his snarky haughtiness, hold his head still and watch pretty jade eyes look up at him while he’s choking on Dick’s cock, lips red and stretched obscenely to try and fit everything in...wanted to hold the Robin down, spear him with his dick and watch it disappear again and again. This perfect assassin who could kill a man in far more creative ways he should know, who could easily flip Dick over and move to snap his neck. But no, Damian wasn’t doing any of that at all. Damian was rutting against his leg like a dog, pupils blown and chest heaving, drinking in Dick’s towering form. _Like a fucking slut. My fucking slut._

“Get on your fucking knees.” Slacks that were more expensive than they had any right to be were dirtied on the cave floor, as Damian dropped hurriedly, painfully, to his knees with a thud. Damian looked up at Dick, his brown skin flushed, mouth open insistently. 

“Don’t look so proud now that you’re on your knees, do you, boy?” Damian stopped breathing, neck snapping up to meet Dick’s cruel gaze. “Tsk, tsk. What would everyone think if the great Damian Wayne was begging for my cock like some whore?” Dick goaded, letting each word leave his tongue slowly and viciously. Frozen, Damian looked as if Dick had slapped him. Dick blinked, thinking he had pushed too far. He had never seen Damian look so thoroughly violated. But looking at the way Damian’s eyes seemed to burn into him, as if he was hanging on every word Dick had said, as well as the very large tent in his pants, Dick knew then he said exactly the right thing. 

“Suck my cock.” 

“Yes, sir.” Damian said quickly, as if he knew he should be embarrassed but couldn’t deny how deeply he longed for Dick to say that. 

Deft tanned fingers shot towards Dick’s sweatpants, pulling them down, eyes glued on the way Dick’s cock bounced with the movement. Dick’s cock bobbed up, and Damian looked at the very thing that he had been imagining filling him for years. It looked massive, thick and long, dark red at the tip with veins that followed back to the black trimmed hair at the base. Precome already beaded at the tip, and Dick’s nostrils flared at the hungry look that passed over Damian’s face. 

A calloused hand wraps around his cock reverently, giving one stroke before a hot mouth surged forward and Dick gritted his teeth so as to not groan out. Damian’s head bobbed vigorously, with little rhythm and all too much intensity. Dick knew of Damian’s vast inexperience, especially within the realm of sex and touch. But the way he just went at it like he did everything in his life, nothing held back, like he was trying to choke himself getting Dick’s cock as far down as he can - it almost made Dick come right there. Dick’s hands flew to hold Damian’s head in a vice grip, and Dick thrusted deep into Damian’s open mouth. Tears were visible at the corners of Damian’s eyes, saliva spilling down to the floor underneath them, and Damian moaned loudly around the dick that pummeled his throat. Dick’s pants and deep groans filled the air, and he watched Damian struggle to maintain eye contact the entire time. Emerald chips drowned in vast pupils, glittering with lust and adoring devotion. Dick saw how hard his counterpart is, but saw that Damian’s hands remain stiff and frozen on his knees; Damian’s self-discipline shocked Dick at the oddest of times, and he couldn’t fathom as to what he had done to deserve this devoted whore of a boy. _I haven’t. I don’t deserve this._

Dick pulled out his cock and thrusted it over Damian’s face, mesmerized by how big his dick looked next to this formidable warrior. “You love that, don’t you? You love my cock? Fuck. My little cock slut, you have no idea how good you look with my dick down your throat. Get up and bend over the railing.” 

Damian staggered up to his feet, grabbing the railing and turning around, presenting his ass to the acrobat. Hoping to feel Dick’s skin, to finally be _skin to skin_ , Damian hastily pulled his dark turtleneck off, casting it off to the side quickly. Dick chuckled darkly, stepping forward to grind against the tight and eager ass before him. Reaching around to snap Damian’s pants open, Dick draped his chest down to cover Damian’s back, and he bit the shell of Damian’s ear viciously. In Dick’s peripheral, he saw Damian’s eyes roll back and he felt Damian push wantonly back at him. 

Damian’s panted with intermittent gasps as Dick pulled his slacks down to pool down over his shoes. Damian’s heart stuttered, and he couldn’t believe that this was _actually_ happening. _Dick is going to fuck me. Dick wants to fuck me. I am going to get filled up by Dick - he will be inside me, using me, painting me with his come. Not anyone else - me._ Possessiveness sparked through Damian, and he couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of power that this man was going to fuck him, that _he_ could get Dick to lose control like this. Voice husky with disuse and a very recent face fucking, Damian tried to gather his thoughts enough to beg. 

“Hurry, just fuck me. I don’t need prep, I can take it, _I can do it_ .” Dick felt a momentary pause, slowing down and savoring Damian’s pleading. This wonderful boy who just bled a need to impress, to be _enough_ , to succeed. Dick felt his heart swell, and he rested his forehead in between sharp shoulder blades. As much as he wanted to just shove himself in Damian’s tight heat, and just as well as he knew that Damian _could_ take it - his pain tolerance was remarkable - that wasn’t how he wanted this time to go. 

“Patience. It’ll be quick.” Long fingers pushed insistently at Damian’s mouth, and he opened immediately to suck them, confused at first. Newly slick fingers danced down to the small of Damian’s back, and Dick came close to spit at Damian’s hole. One finger pushed steadily in, faltering until he pushed past the initial ring of resistance. As soon as Damian felt stable, familiar with the presence of a finger, Dick pushed a second in. It burned, Damian not used to fingers larger than his, but he pushed back, trying to swallow more of Dick - trying to _prove_ he could take whatever Dick gave him. 

Dick watched, fascinated with the way Damian seemed to be overriding his body to welcome the intrusion, and he sped up, fingering him deeper. Damian’s pants through gritted teeth gave way to loud whines when Dick angled his fingers down just so, and Damian felt the familiar jolt that made his cock jerk. Dick thrusted a couple of times more, Damian shaking under him, and his own cock twitched in renewed protest. _Fuck, I can’t wait anymore. You’re gonna have to take it now._ Dick leaned forward, lapping sloppily at Damian’s pink hole and spitting inside. Straightening up and grabbing his leaking cock, Dick slapped Damian’s ass roughly with the palm of his hand. Damian startled, but moaned needily and Dick could barely control himself. 

“You’re gonna take this cock real good, bitch. I already know it.” 

Frantic, sweat glistening down his back, Dick pushed the head of his cock in. Damian grunted, eyes shut with the large intrusion. Desperate to finally _join_ , he pushed back urgently, welcoming the burn that seemed to split him open as Dick sank in, inch by inch. Both men groaned loudly as soon as Dick bottomed out, balls hitting Damian’s. 

Dick’s eyes rolled back, jaw tight as he tried to grasp some semblance of self-control. The tight _hot_ heat was more obscene than anything he had ever done before - the knowledge that he was using Damian, _taking_ his virginity - that he was fucking Damian Wayne like he was his bitch. Trying not to process how loudly Damian was moaning, Dick breathed out and focused. _I am gonna make this boy a fucking mess._

“You’re so fucking tight, baby. Fuck, you’re swallowing down my cock so good. Should’ve known you were my cock slut. You’re fucking _mine_.” 

“Yours, yours, only yours.” Damian chanted, meeting Dick halfway each thrust. 

“ _Only mine. My little whore._ ” Dick growled, grabbing Damian by the hips hard enough he knew he would bruise. 

“You could have taken me anytime, I was always ready, beloved. I would have done anything.” Damian rasped, promising. Dick knew then that he was right, and terrible thoughts came to mind - how he could have fucked Damian back when they were Batman and Robin, against the Batmobile, in an alley, on rooftops. How he could have made snide comments so quickly turn into pathetic whining. How he could have pulled down black tights and pushed up a red vest to ravage his surly companion. Finding a muscled ass that surely was too small for him. He knew now, looking back, how easy it would have been. How blind he had been, barred from the very possibility from the constructs he had erected in his mind. The thought that Damian had been hoping for years, watching Dick for any sign that he was interested, made Dick’s cock pulse deep in Damian. _You want this. You’ve always wanted this._

Dick snapped his hips forward, deep into his former ward, trying to carve as far in as he could. Damian’s knuckles were white with the strain of propping himself up on the rails overlooking the waterfall, and Dick knew with how rough he was being, Damian would be sore for days. 

“Is this what you wanted? Were you just watching me, hoping I would look back? That’s a long time to wait only for me.” Dick’s low baritone taunted. 

Damian whined, pushing back into Dick’s relentless thrusts. Dick’s tanned fingers traveled roughly up Damian’s toros, tweaking his nipples before locking on his neck. Damian thought it shouldn’t be nearly as hot as it was when Dick’s large hand would hold his neck tight, but it was _submission_ \- the pushback against his natural instinct to quite literally protect his jugular. The open invitation to do _whatever_ he so wanted, the assurance that there was nothing Dick could do that Damian would not let him do. It felt addicting, to _prove_ so wholly that he was Dick’s in every realm. It was foolish to think he could have let anyone else in. _Ever._

Dick almost didn’t know what to do with all this power over Damian - it felt like blood in the water. He felt predatory, possessive, crazed. He wanted _more_ , never wanted to stop seeing this powerful warrior under him shatter into a million pieces, the softness of Damian’s heart oozing out. He wanted to dig deeper, drown in the rawness of Damian’s passion, and make the fire in his eyes come out. 

“And what was I doing? Looking past you and fucking any beautiful woman that crossed my path. I was fucking them, letting them suck my cock, using _them_ , and what were you doing?” Dick jabbed. Dick’s hands tightened on Damian’s neck, and he pressed his chest down to Damian’s back slicked with sweat. Dick could feel Damian’s pulse thundering, his abdominal muscles contracting with the force of his thrusts, and the chorus of pants falter as Damian registered what Dick was saying. _Yes, that’s right. Show me that fire._

Damian couldn’t help the flood of anger within his body, the nasty envy bred from insecurity that left Damian wired to explode. It didn’t matter that he was in more bliss than he had ever been in his life, that he was getting fucked even better than he could’ve dreamed, by _Dick Grayson_ . That he had pre-come streaming down his aching cock almost constantly, his cock so unbelievably hard he knew a single breath on it would send him reeling. _No._ Because devastating images of Dick passing him up, discarding him easily, in favor of some stupid leggy woman, swirled in Damian’s mind and he couldn’t focus, couldn’t hide how easily Dick could hurt him. 

“Yes, you were jacking off to _me_ , in the dark of your room, while _I_ was moaning someone else’s name, buried to the hilt in pussy. And what did you do? _Nothing_ . You just thought about how you were so much better. _So show me. Show me what everything from you means._ ” Dick challenged, licking a stripe down Damian’s taut neck. Dick’s thrusts hadn’t faltered, mechanically driving deep into Damian, each force enough to make Damian almost stumble. 

_Show you?_ Damian felt murderous, cut so sharply - so _carelessly_ , in the softest part of his insecurities - to not measure up to Dick’s extensive history, to let inexperience erase the power of his devotion, to just _not_ have anything to offer that was better. Damian _knew_ he could show it better, no one else could bare a chest so carved out for Dick, no one could match his devotion. Damian’s teeth bared, his dark jade eyes lit with fire. 

“ _Show you?_ ” Damian echoed, hotly. “They were _nothing_ . _No one_ loves you more than I do. You are _everything_ to me. I am _yours_ , and you are _mine._ ” Damian growled, eyes flashing. Dick felt his cock throb seeing the possessiveness, the haughty jealousy that made Damian so passionate, the overwhelming fire that left him breathless. 

Damian pushed his back out further, arms stretched to grasp on the railing still. He pushed his hips down, ass higher, and tensed his muscles. At the change in position, with Dick’s cock brushing over his prostate, Damian moaned loudly. He could feel Dick’s breathing become more strained, grunts coming easier. Damian put all of his energy in pushing back as hard as he could, taking all of Dick, clenching his hole in rhythm with Dick’s thrusts. Every push back was calculated, borne from all of Damian’s focus to _show_ his love finally. He wanted to milk Dick’s cock, prove that he was hungry for him, that he had always been, that he always would be.

“Do you have any idea how much I have hungered for this, Richard? I can’t go a day without thinking about how badly I want you to use me, to own me. How many years I have been _empty_ of your cock. No amount of fingers work. No way I touch myself could come close to the mere thought of you. How I don’t know where I end and you begin, because you are in my bones, my blood. And I am _your slut_.” Damian said harshly. 

Dick’s thrusts became erratic, hands leaving dark, angry bruises on Damian’s brown skin. Dick’s eyes locked with Damian, his nostrils flaring, jaw hard. Dick’s grunts were getting louder, his swears less controlled. 

“I would kill anyone else that even tried to touch me. I am yours. And you - my love. Richard, you are _mine_ .” Damian said ruthlessly. Damian’s hips stuttered, grinding back on Dick’s leaking cock. He felt so full, so truly complete. The undeniable proof of their bond, their merging of bodies and soul, the knowledge that _Dick loved him too_ , was enough to finally push Damian over the edge. Untouched, Damian’s stomach contracted, his balls drawing up, and he came, shooting hot ropes of come onto his stomach. Eyes rolled back, Damian moaned Dick’s name, seeing white with the intensity of his orgasm. 

Dick groaned, powerful thrusts getting bruisingly harder, as he plunged deep into Damian’s tightening channel. Dick knew he was close, could feel his muscles contracting lower and lower, and he held Damian’s spent heavy body up unsteadily. Locking his elbow around Damian’s head and forcing him to look straight up, Dick felt Damian’s back arc into him. Ice blue eyes darted sideways to look at Damian’s glazed eyes and lolling mouth, and he felt his orgasm building. 

“That’s right, baby. I am yours, and you are mine. _Always_.” Dick grunted, before finally letting go, coming deep into Damian. Hot white spurts coated Damian’s insides, and Damian whined, pushing back and clenching to keep Dick’s cock in. 

Damian leaned heavily on the railing, sustaining both of their weight. Dick’s chest was plastered all over Damian’s back, and both muscled bodies were heaving sharply. Damian leaned his head against Dick’s, closing his eyes and breathing in Dick’s scent slowly. Dark lips brushed his jaw, and Damian relished in the heat coming off of Dick in waves. 

“I love you, beloved.” Damian whispered, trying to put all of his swirling emotions behind the statement. 

Dick grinned, eyes closed, and brought his hands to rest possessively over Damian’s chest. “I love you, too, little prince. I do, too.” Dick caught the small smile Damian wore and the almost shy way he turned his head into Dick’s. Happiness on Damian’s face - real true, happiness, made him look softer and younger. So often was his handsome face pulled in a dark frown or a surly sneer, that honest happiness was a rarity to witness. 

Dick kissed the side of Damian’s head, untangling their sweaty bodies and pulling out with a groan. Damian whimpered, trying not to think about how overwhelmingly vulnerable Dick pulling out left him. With Dick in him, he couldn’t find more appealing evidence that this was _real_ , that Dick did love him, did not think he was disgusting, and would not leave him. Damian felt utterly empty already. But he was full of Dick’s come, and he _definitely_ could feel that, so Damian focused on not letting any drip out. Damian bent down to pull up his slacks and grab his nearby crumple of a shirt, straightening. Muscled arms and sharp broad shoulders filled out the tight turtleneck, and Damian looked over softly at Dick dressing himself. 

The sounds of the waterfall filtered back into Damian’s consciousness, and he realized that that was probably the only reason they didn’t get caught. Ears even sharper than his were somewhere in the cave, most likely still at the Bat Computer, and he only found comfort in the fact that he knew no one would be able to hear his loud wanton moans unless they were right behind him. 

“Will you stay with me tonight?” Damian asked, still hesitant despite the fact Dick was drilling into him not five minutes ago.

Dick laughed, looking fondly over at the teen.“Uh, _duh_. I get the right side of the bed. I’m very picky, you know.” Dick jested, twisting his mouth into one of those shining smiles that left people breathless. 

Damian smiled softly, thinking about how he was so unbelievably happy he didn’t really know what to do with it. _Dick loves me, too! He actually loves me back. I can’t believe I get to say that. Wayne comes out on top! Or bottom, rather._ Damian watched Dick smooth out his clothes, muscles straining with the littlest movements. 

Noticing his own body for the first time, Damian did indeed feel split in half. He was very aware of the come that was still in him, and his ass was remarkably sore. And yet, he didn’t feel like his heart had calmed at all, considering...his heart _still_ pounded, his skin still felt electric around the older man, and bright emeralds drank in Dick obsessively. Damian imagined that others might find his devotion excessive, but they simply didn’t understand love like he did. Damian had believed love was meant to be given out only very sparingly. Love was a weakness, a chance to _be_ weak, to be discarded. And then he had met _Dick_ . Dick, who was everything that was light, kind and honest, blindingly attractive, unparalleled in his talents, so wholly _good_ . And suddenly, Damian didn’t care. Didn’t care if he devoted his entire being for this man who never looked his way again. Didn’t care if he spent his whole life aching for Dick. _Because I would suffer every lifetime longing for you before I ever took back my heart. You are everything. Everything I want. Everything I need. Everything I don’t deserve._

  
 _But I am not selfless like you._ Damian felt his insides burn possessively the longer he watched Dick, the familiar passion that flowed in his blood growing wildly. _No one else. I am yours, and you are mine. I know it in my very bones, beloved._


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and so now we start to deal with the aftermath! it's been really interesting to explore how each character would react to this, and I think that's why I always come back to these boys. they are just rife with angst and insecurities, yet they all deal with it pretty differently. ̶a̶l̶s̶o̶ ̶I̶ ̶l̶o̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶m̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶s̶e̶x̶ ̶l̶o̶l̶.̶ ̶i̶f̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶'̶r̶e̶ ̶h̶o̶r̶n̶y̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶m̶e̶,̶ ̶d̶o̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶r̶y̶!̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶w̶i̶l̶l̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶M̶o̶r̶e̶ ̶S̶e̶x̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶d̶u̶e̶ ̶t̶i̶m̶e̶.̶ as always, I very much appreciate any comments and I really hope you enjoy! ;)
> 
> ps. kudos to anyone who catches the injustice comic reference! it's something dick says to bruce (about damian) and I found that I really really love their dialogue in those panels, so I really try and keep those in mind. anyways, I'll shut up now :D

Damian awoke with a start, feeling cold. He stretched out his hand, trying to find Dick. Scarred hands came up with nothing, and emerald eyes scanned the dark room. Fear made him shoot up, sheets pooling around his bare hips. He looked around once more, desperately trying to find Dick in the shadows of his room. _He isn’t here._ Panic paralyzed Damian’s chest, and he realized he had been left. Dick had left. Damian hadn’t cried for real in a very long time - he was very proud of that, but the hot prickling behind his eyes threatened to change that. Why had he thought everything would just work? That Dick would just look past all of the moral barriers with some sex? _Maybe I pressured him, and he just went with the moment. I don’t know what I thought was gonna happen. To be happy, when all my life has been stained with blood and not measuring up? Fool._

Damian felt hot tears streaming slowly down his face, his vision blurring and his throat hiccuping trying to stave off his crying. He wished he could summon some anger that his vulnerability had been so quickly discarded, but he couldn’t. It was Dick. Damian’s heart was placed within Dick’s hands to do what he wished, and if he truly did not want Damian, there was nothing Damian could do. There was a simplicity in that, at least. 

A creak in the window startled Damian, and he tried to gather himself before he was killed while crying in his bed. _Oh, if Mother could see me now._ In a defensive crouch with muscles tensed, Damian held his breath and steeled himself from the threat. 

Dick’s head poked through the blinds, ducking back briefly before snapping back, realizing Damian’s state. 

“Damian! What are you doing? I didn’t se - hey, have you been crying?” 

“No.” Damian lied. 

“Don’t lie. What’s wrong, little prince?” Dick said, twisting the rest of his body to come back in Damian’s room. 

“Nothing.” _Did you leave? What are we doing here?_

Dick stared at Damian, with tears streaming down and a stony face. Understanding dawned on Dick’s face, and Damian couldn’t help the way his breath hitched. _So easy._ Dick beckoned Damian over, inclining his head towards the window ledge. Damian got up slowly, posture stiff and frame hunched. 

In the dark of the room, the glow of Gotham softened Dick’s sharp profile. Ice blue eyes looked warm, shadows painting the underside of a sharp jaw and creeping up to soft hair that fell over dark eyebrows. Damian felt dark, swallowed by the shadows and his tide of emotions, leery of stepping in the spotlight that Dick always managed to find. 

“Look at the skyline.” Damian turned his head, taking in the varying heights of Gotham’s tallest buildings. Each one was surrounded by a warm orange glow, slowly waning into the dark black. “It never fails to make my blood race, to make me want to go flying. You know, when I was your age, I’d always sleep towards the window in my room, just so I could watch the city. It didn’t matter if my body ached to turn over. Even if I couldn’t sleep, if I was up from a case or fighting with your dad or whatever, watching the skyline would calm me in a way nothing else could. I’d imagined all these people walking around in the city, laughing and holding hands, kissing and hugging, faces illuminated against the sky, and I would just feel happy. I’ve always wanted that.” 

Damian stayed silent, still not sure whether or not his earlier breakdown was preemptive or not. He imagined a younger Dick, always looking out to the light and hoping. How he felt like he was always trailing behind the spotlight, but everyone around him knew that he was the lighthouse in a dark sea. Damian knew Dick was a romantic at heart. Dick had fallen too easily before, but Damian acquiesced that he couldn’t _really_ fault him for just wanting to love and be loved. 

“And I have felt that several times. I know that feeling, that warm, happy feeling. Of loving someone and holding their heart, knowing that you would die for them. It’s made me who I am today.” 

Damian felt very ill. Sitting precarious on the ledge of _he loves me, he loves me not_ , a fond appreciation for past relationships wasn’t entirely a shove in the right direction. He _thought_ they had already played all their cards, but maybe Dick had changed his mind. Now that he had some time to reflect. Each second felt like a conveyor belt down to the dark chasm of _he loves me not_ , and Damian almost just wanted Dick to say it and break his heart. But he _couldn’t_. Even this limbo that seemed to splinter all his insides and break his heart piece by piece felt worth it. Because that was just what it meant, giving your heart. You didn’t get it back. It never came back to you. And you loved every second of it, regardless. 

“But. That’s not really what I feel when I’m with you.” Damian felt hollow, felt the wind race into his body and whistle coming out, nothing inside. Dick paused, and Damian stopped breathing, trying to not explode on impact down to _he loves me not_. 

“I feel a hot burning, love for you. The kind that doesn’t leave. The kind that just swallows everything that I am, that makes my blood _burn_ . I meant everything that I said earlier. I came over here lost, needing to think, to try and reconcile this suffocating love I feel for you with my conscience. Because it’s not simple, not like any of my previous relationships. There’s so many things I can’t justify in my head, no matter which way I turn it. I’ve never had to worry about _why_ I loved like I have to when I think of you.” Dick said wistfully. He smiled ruefully, tilting his head towards the younger man. “I can’t just ignore them. But I’m not. I love you _through_ them. Not despite them, I love you even _more_ for them. They excite me. Which is so very wrong, but this happiness I feel with you...I know this is it. My one I’ve always wanted, that I’ve craved.”

“I would not just die for you - I would _kill_ for you. And I know you would do the same. I think I always did know. I just didn’t see it. But this is me telling you yes. I needed to tell you for real. Not because I want to fuck you right after, not because it’s easy, but because it’s hard. So if you really do want this - _all_ of it, then I am yours.” Dick turned completely, half of his face bathed in a warm glow and half hidden in darkness. 

Damian had never been so totally emotionally thrashed in a twenty-four hour period, much less in the past two _minutes_ . He was so elated he couldn’t even feel embarrassed about his dramatic breakdown. Once again, he felt like he was spilling out at the seams. Felt like his emotions would always rule him, and usually he loathed that - it was his greatest weakness, but when it concerned Dick, it felt like he could do anything. _Or lose everything_ . He looked at Dick’s handsome face, how Dick had surrendered half of himself to darkness in loving Damian. It struck Damian how much Dick was giving up to love him. How he didn’t ever really realize how much Dick must truly love him to discard his morals and the _right_ thing. His chest expanded, hot lava filling him out. _This is everything. And I get to keep it._ Damian laughed softly, trying to release the suffocating tension in his chest. He grasped Dick’s hand softly, and stepped only a breath away from Dick. 

Emerald eyes sparkled playfully, so undeniably happy, and Dick saw Damian smile the biggest smile he had ever seen the boy wear. White teeth that usually looked predatory looked gentle, captivating in the secret smile they belonged to. 

“You should know better than to doubt. I have never not been, and I never will not be bound to you.” Damian said assuredly, as if Dick had asked the simplest question ever. 

Damian pressed against the very man that had ruled his life for the past seven years. Scarred hands worshipped the man beneath them, jade eyes trying to memorize every detail of Dick’s face to lock away. Dick’s breath fanned out onto Damian’s face, and Damian closed the gap slowly. Dark lips met chapped lips, and while every kiss they had shared before was clashing and controlling, this possession was softer. Tongues met slowly, exploring and embracing, giving instead of taking. Damian savored the moment, not wanting to pull back, but for once not feeling as if the vision would end if he did. Jade eyes opened and locked with ice blue, and Damian rested against Dick’s neck. Dick’s hands settled on sharp hips, and Damian pulled Dick as close as he could. 

“And to think that I thought you were in love with Jason. Did you know that’s what I thought?” Damian pulled back sharply, emerald eyes looking to see if Dick was kidding. 

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Damian asked, appalled. Dick laughed, head tilting back. Now it all just felt _funny_ , like the past several weeks that were truly pure hell were from some distant timeline. _How many nights did I lay awake, cursing Jason’s name? How many did I spend picturing Damian, even forcefully, only to think that I could never have him?_ Dick’s hands roamed lovingly up Damian’s bare chest. He grinned, looking at Damian’s scandalized face, trying not to be too pleased with himself. 

“That night on the mats. You and Jason talked about something, you won’t tell me _or_ tell me who you love, then he gets you riled up. Next thing I see, you’re fucking yourself on the mats. Then you and Jason have this electric charge between you that night we dealt with the ports. _Then_ he comes to Bludhaven asking about whether he should tell someone he’s in love with that he loves them even if it’s wrong.” 

Damian’s mouth gaped, and he furrowed his brow angrily. “ _Todd? Jason Todd?_ You thought I loved him?... _He visited you?_ ” Damian spluttered. Dick nodded, amused. Damian shut his eyes, bringing his fingers up to massage his temple. 

_Dear God, for being supposedly so intelligent, this man is so fucking oblivious. Literally mentally vacant._ Damian hung his hands around Dick’s neck, wondering how the light of his - _everyone’s_ life apparently, was so damn dim. “Richard. I - no. While Todd and I understand each other minimally better, I cannot believe that even came out of your mouth, much less that you let that horrid idea fester in your gorgeously empty head. Who do you think Todd is in love with?” 

Dick looked at Damian quizzically. “Uh. Didn’t you know? Isn’t it you?” Dick said slowly, unsure for the first time about his hasty conclusions. 

Damian closed his eyes in exasperation. “Dear God, Richard. You drive me insane. _You!_ He is in love with you! He always has been. He knew I loved you, and that’s why he was riling me up. He has always loved you. He probably was trying to see if he could ever tell you, Dick.” Damian finished softly, for once feeling bad for Jason. Jason had been through a lot, even he could acknowledge that. But he never felt bad for him, just knew that sometimes life dealt you a shitty hand. Damian hadn’t gotten the most enchanting hand himself. But this...this was different. He and Jason weren’t all too different, but this time, he was the one who got to be happy. _I need to remember that. Value that. Value Jason. I also am going to get that promised punch in the head, unfortunately._

Dick’s mind had turned to static. He felt empty...and sad. _Stupid_ . Like he could spend ten lifetimes trying to repay Jason for his misplaced envy and rage and still owe him. When all Jason had been doing was trying to find love in Dick. _He was talking about me that night._ And Dick had not only ignored him, but demonized him. _Why? Why does he love me? I am so fucking awful._

Damian brushed Dick’s hair back, moving forward to bump his nose with Dick’s. “Darling, no. Don’t punish yourself. You didn’t know. You’re very unaware of the effect you have. I think you try so hard to wear your heart on your sleeve and a kind smile for everyone, that you don’t get to see that everyone else is giving their heart to you back. Come.” 

Damian tightened his hold on Dick, whose face had fallen in a penitent frown. “I guess this is a fitting time to tell you everyone.” Damian brought his hands through Dick’s hair, relishing that he got to do that. That from now on, he would be the only one to do that. “Dra- Tim, too. He recognized it in me. And Father, but I’m betting you know that.” Dick closed his eyes, and his face twisted ashamedly with the news about Tim, and the confirmation that he and Bruce’s tether was not as invisible as he had hoped. _Tim! Tim, too? I never would have guessed. Poor Tim. God, I am so stupid._

Damian continued, trying to make Dick come back to him. “And every damn woman we work with. Every female superhero looks at you like you’re a god, every woman we save - honestly, it is very maddening. Plenty of men, as well. And you’re _absolutely_ oblivious. I never want to kill anyone more than when we are in a room of Dick admirers. Which is _often_ , beloved.” Damian said mock accusingly, trying to get Dick to see the hilarity in his blindness. Dick laughed softly, eyes looking a little less pained. He even had the sense to look embarrassed, and Damian’s heart twinged. 

“And you can talk to them later, darling. But not now. They aren’t mad at you. You’ve done nothing but been the most glowing, kind, and loving light in all of our lives. We are just lucky you let us look at you... _I’m_ the luckiest man in the world because you looked back.” Damian finished seriously. 

Dick snorted, but smiled softly. “I do think it’s the other way around, little prince.” He looked at Damian, whose bed tousled hair turned into sharp spikes that stuck up everywhere. His brown skin had an orange glow from the city lights, and golden flecks in his emerald eyes glowed. He wore a genuine smile, the happy one that Dick already felt addicted to seeing. High cheekbones had dried tears, and Dick couldn’t help but wonder at how lucky he was Damian had ever spared him a second thought. He really didn’t deserve it, didn’t deserve _any_ of their love. _But especially Damian’s._ That that angry, proud, and insecure ten year old would revere him, would pledge his life to him, when he had the most reason to renounce Dick. That he stood there in front of Dick, much broader and bigger, but still so young, with the same passion and devotion. _Mine. This boy is mine. I’m never letting you go._

“Semantics, semantics.” 

“Well. I do want to talk to them, but I’ll wait. In the meantime, I just want to be with you.” Dick turned back to the city, opening his arms wider for Damian. The youngest Wayne stepped into them, head laying on Dick’s neck, and welcomed the feeling of _wholeness_ , of _happiness_ , and of _home_ that Dick gave him. Dick held his hand tightly, squeezing three beats and smiled when he got three beats in return. His other hand splayed out possessively on Damian’s bare stomach. 

“Did you ever think about people fucking in the city when you watched the skyline?” Damian asked, voice deceptively casual. 

“That might have been a prominent part, yes. But they were _in love_ fucking. It’s very different from me just being horny back then.” 

“Weren’t yo-”

“Besides the point.”

“Well, along with all the other nightly activities, we may have to do that as well. Just for the sake of completion, of course.” Damian said offhandedly. 

A pleased chuckle met Damian’s ears, and he grinned. Dick tilted his head conspiratorially. “Oh, indubitably, little prince. For you, anything.” 

\---

Dick hesitated, finally catching sight of Bruce’s head over the chair to the Bat Computer. He felt little again, like he had done something wrong on patrol and was waiting to receive Bruce’s punishing glare. Like he was ten again, and he was hurting before he even had to look up at Bruce’s towering form and sharp blue eyes. Dick was in his civvies, coming impulsively over from Bludhaven in the middle of the night. He had been twisting in sweat soaked sheets, guilty and anxious, wondering what he could possibly tell Bruce that wouldn’t ruin everything. It had been several days since _that_ night had happened, and Dick wasn’t sure how long he could keep putting it off. Since that night, Damian had tried to join Dick for patrol whenever he could, and Dick knew that it was only a matter of time until Bruce figured something was up. Stolen kisses in the dark of Bludhaven’s rooftops that left Damian flushed and eyes gleaming were _incredible,_ but each kiss left Dick guilty that he was just avoiding the pressing problem. The very large _bat_ problem. _3AM is as good a time as any, in this family._

  
  


Bruce’s fingers were flying across the keyboard, the computer screen flashing. Dick was so jittery he couldn’t focus on what Bruce was looking at. There was so much...so much _history_ , between them. All Dick could think about was how he _had_ to own up to the consequences of his forbidden love. What he had done was unforgivable. Worthy of breaking their special tether, their bond, their love. _Falling in love with his underage son. Fucking his underage son. Coming to him to say that I am never going to stop._ As much as the very real potential fallout would hurt, Dick still couldn't regret it at all. _Damian is worth it. I need to do this._ Overriding his locked legs, Dick moved forward carefully towards the very last place on earth he wanted to be. 

“Dick. I’ve heard you hovering for several minutes. Clearly you wish to talk about something.” 

Bruce was in his full gear, save for the cowl. Dick winced, laughing nervously. “Yes, I should have known. Do you have a moment?”

“Or several, it looks like. You look awful. Is something wrong?” Bruce turned in his chair, his powerful presence pinning Dick. Close cropped raven hair lengthened into sharp strands, and a hard jawline betrayed growing stubble. Save for the blue eyes, he looked so much like an older copy of the boy Dick defiled just nights prior. _Damn, this is gonna be hard._ Hard gray planes ran with black shadows and Bruce’s tired but calculating eyes gleamed under dark eyebrows. 

“No, well, maybe. Bruce, I -” Dick exhaled sharply and pushed his hair back. “I literally have no idea how I’m gonna do this. I know we’ve never talked about...about _us_ , and I wish we did because I don’t know how to do this really. Bruce, I do lo-” Bruce stiffened, back going ramrod straight. His face darkened immediately, eyes flitting to Dick’s fearfully, and his nostrils flared. 

“ _Dick_. Stop. Don’t...don’t say it. There’s nothing to talk about. Don’t say it.” Bruce said angrily, glaring at Dick. 

Dick leaned on the Bat Computer for support, legs getting weaker. _What did I expect?_ “But I do, Bruce. _We_ do. I’ve always known. And so have you. I don’t want it to go away, okay? So shut up and just _listen_ to me for once. Please, for me. Just listen to me.” Furious dark blue eyes narrowed at Dick, and the arms of the chair were at risk of breaking from the force of Bruce’s grip. 

“I did love you growing up. I had the _biggest_ crush on you. And I loved you. I _do_ , even now, which is like, really fucked up with what I’m about to say. Freud would have a field day with us.” Dick laughed sadly. _There’s not enough time in the day to unpack how fucked up this all is._ Bruce gritted his teeth, and Dick tried to ignore how pained the older man looked. _If you talked about your emotions a day in your damn life then we wouldn’t have to unpack this atomic bomb._

“We just didn’t have the right timing, and maybe you didn’t want to ever make that jump. Because you never wanted to want to. I know you, and your terrible guilt complex. Like trust me, I _really do now_ . But you never did anything to make me like this. I just am. I just grew into the fact that we would always dance around each other but that was okay. I love walking that chasm, this _life_ , loving you across it. And now I know what it must have felt like, for you.” Dick said. 

He looked down at the giant black boots Bruce wore, and remembered how much bigger they seemed when he was Robin. When every action was boiled down to trying to impress this man in front of him, of being not just good enough, but deserving of his love. Countless nights spent under the shadow of his cape, frustrated that Bruce never let them make that jump. That he could feel hooded eyes following him everywhere, and dark hands that would hold him together but never stay long enough to hold him. 

But then he needed to leave, to grow into himself, to make Bruce really _see_ him even if it was a city over. To let him _fly_. And the ache lessened. Dick fell in love, again and again. Dick didn’t think about who he left behind nearly as much. 

And then Damian came along, and on top of trying to desperately piece himself back together after Bruce died, Dick had to step into those big, black boots. Had to wield the power that Batman symbolized, try to make Bruce _proud_ when Dick felt like it couldn’t ever be more impossible. All while a snarky brat that was Bruce’s spitting image nipped at his heels. 

But the ache lessened, and Damian became the most important relationship he had. And _it_ didn’t happen instantly, for Dick at least. He never caught Damian’s lingering gaze that burned for him, never even allowed himself to consider such an option. But then at some point it _did_ happen, and his mind sealed it up and pushed it so deep down that Dick walked around that wall every day he saw Damian, and he didn’t ever look over. _Batman falls in love with Robin. That’s how it goes. I know it better than anyone._ Dick had always known those big, black boots were so difficult to fill in, but they also bred something dark - something _forbidden_ \- in Dick’s soul.

“When I was Batman, Damian fell in love with me.” Bruce didn’t move, eyes following Dick carefully. All things considered, he didn’t look surprised at all. _Not new knowledge. Well, get ready._

“I am aware of that.” Bruce said tightly. Bats shrieked overhead, and Dick gathered himself before he took the plunge. 

“I didn’t realize it at the time. But I did, too. I fell in love with my Robin. With Damian. And I only realized recently.” Dick let the words sit in the air between them, and they felt so loud. Dick had said it so quietly, but he might as well have shouted them into Bruce’s face. A short gust of air escaped Bruce’s nose, but otherwise he showed no signs of hearing. He looked stiffer than Dick had ever seen him, and every muscle on his formidable body seemed to be straining hard enough to rip off. But his _eyes_ blazed, and Dick knew he was barely keeping himself together. 

“And I swear, Bruce, I fucking fought it. I did, and I know what you must have felt. I _hated_ myself. But it’s inescapable - it won’t _leave_ . I know how wrong it is. But it is real, and honest, and true - and I _can’t_ stop. It’s what you have given me. What I will always give you. What I hope you will give me to give to Damian. Because he’s my one. I know it.” 

Bruce shut his eyes painfully, jaw rigid, and his arms shook. Abruptly, he broke the chair arms with a loud crack, and he rose violently, the chair careening backwards. Nostrils flaring and eyes flashing, he pushed his cape back, hands twitching. Dick recognized the energy that tore off him in waves, and how many times in the past it had ended violently. He looked scraped raw, mere seconds away from a breakdown. Bruce would have never been truly ready to talk about _them_ , let alone Dick falling for his _son_ . Dick’s confession ruptured every wall Bruce had erected, _walls that were stronger than Dick’s had ever been_ , and devastated him. 

Dick felt tears on his cheeks, and he wished that everything about love wasn’t so damn fucking hard. He risked putting a tentative hand on Bruce’s cheek, and Bruce momentarily leaned into it before jolting back violently. “Bruce, please. Say something.”

Bruce’s stony face hardened, and his ragged breathing slowed. Dark blue eyes snapped up to Dick’s ice blues. Dick pulled back and stood bare in front of him. “You’re absolutely sure.” Bruce said gravelly. _Yes. I’ve never been more sure._

“Yes. I am.” Dick whispered. Bruce eyed Dick wildly, looking for any doubt, any _don’t worry it’s not true_ , any _it’s not true I just love you_ , but he didn’t find any. The anger in Bruce’s body died, and he looked broken, like all the power he needed to keep himself together at the seams had drained out. 

“I dreaded this day. When you chose someone. And you have chosen my son.” Bruce said quietly. Dick looked ashamedly at his former mentor. _I need him so bad. I can’t lose either of you. Please stay. Please don’t go._

“I do share in his,” Bruce faltered. His hands were shaking, and he looked like every word ripped out of his chest. “-in his affections for you. I hated myself for it. I do, still.” Dick looked up at him, tears clouding his eyes. 

“But it crept up on me. I gave you my heart long ago. When you were so young. When it was so _wrong_ . And it’s only grown as you’ve become the man before me. You’re everything that’s light.” _It’s like I’m talking to Damian. You guys are so fucking similar._

“I don’t like it. That my son gets you in the capacity I have only dreamed of. But...I am also happy for him. Distantly. It’s...very difficult. You are both my sons, but you are...more. You’ve always been so much more to me.” Bruce looked down at their feet, his big black boots bracketing outside of Dick’s slimmer boots. “But I am comforted by the fact that Damian loves you like I do. Completely. Wholly. Till death. I want you to be happy...Even if it’s just barely beyond me.” 

Dick stepped into Bruce’s stiff arms, holding him tightly. His tears wet Bruce’s neck, and Dick felt the older man’s body violently shaking. Over Bruce’s shoulder, Dick saw the chair arms lying shattered by their feet. Bruce held Dick hesitantly back, black gauntlets hovering over Dick’s dark gray sweater. 

Dick pulled back, hands wrapping around Bruce’s neck. _Once upon a time._ He looked at Bruce’s crumpled face, sharp lines and handsome features that had imprinted on his heart so long ago looking softer. So much of him now reminded him of Damian. But there was a time before Damian, when it was just Bruce and Dick, and Dick cherished the place he would always have in his heart. _I won’t forget. Not ever._ In that moment, Dick let go of years of resentment, of unspoken words, of _aching_ , and remembered that those big black boots didn’t end with Bruce. _Batman falls in love with Robin._ Understood how much Bruce would have to give up to see Dick love Damian. “Thank you, Bruce. I owe you everything.” Dick whispered. Dick’s hands moved up to hold Bruce’s face, and his lips ghosted over Bruce’s. Stepping on his tiptoes, Dick kissed Bruce’s bowed forehead and pushed back dark, spiky hair back that was so achingly familiar. _These Wayne men._

Bruce grunted, finally relenting and holding Dick tight enough that Dick worried distantly if he would leave with broken ribs. _It’s okay. I’m not leaving._ Bruce pulled back as soon as his ragged breathing evened several minutes later. Dick watched him smooth his face and piece himself back together. Suddenly, Dick was looking up into the same stoic, rough face that he knew he would always look up into. _I love you. I will always walk that chasm with you._

“Did he tell you first?” 

Dick nodded. _Please don’t ask about what happened next, for the love of God._ Bruce eyed the way Dick flushed. He grimaced, looking away. Bruce swallowed, forcing himself to talk. “Then he did what I couldn’t. Who else knows?” Bruce asked, voice guttural. 

“No one. I told you first.” 

“Will you tell Tim and Jason?” Piercing dark blue eyes shifted over to Dick. 

Dick blanched. _Did literally everybody know except for me?_ “Yes...I’m not looking forward to it at all, honestly. They don’t...know like _you_ do. It’s not the same. Especially Jason.” Dick said tiredly, hanging his head. 

“No. They won’t understand. But they love you.” Bruce answered gruffly. 

“That’s stupid. I don’t get it. I don’t deserve it at all.” Dick muttered. 

A ghost of a smile rested on Bruce’s mouth. “I wondered if you’d ever notice. I’m surprised Damian told you about them.” Bruce said, tilting his head back. Dick scowled. _All of you knew for so damn long, and no one thought that maybe, it would be nice if I was in the loop? Before I unknowingly ruin every relationship? Of course not. Silly me._

“I am not _blind_ \- I would have found out. Eventually.” Dick lied. “I wish they just told me. Well...maybe not. Goddamn it, I don’t know. I don’t even know what I would have said if they told me.”

“I never wanted them to tell you. I was mindful that Damian was...particularly devoted. But I suppose I discounted him too easily.” Bruce said woodenly, ignoring the ugly flare of jealousy that spread through his chest. 

“For someone to be so thoroughly stubborn in their devotion, they would have to be directly related to you. Rather fitting, really. It’s just all part of the Wayne charm.” Dick’s mouth twitched up, and he remembered what Jason had said about Dick loving broken men. _Broken Wayne men._

“Perhaps we are more similar than I’d care to admit.” Bruce conceded. He looked at the Bat Computer and furrowed his brows, wrestling with something on the tip of his tongue. “Dick...you’re everybody’s everything. But it is the farthest thing from undeserved.” Bruce insisted quietly.

“I don’t know about that.” Dick sighed. “I’m sorry. I love you.” Dick said, not expecting a response. Bruce’s dark blue eyes rested on Dick a beat too long, and his frown deepened. “I love you, too.” Bruce said so softly Dick only realized that it was _real_ and _actually happened_ because of the way he avoided looking at the acrobat. Dick instantly felt the pressure in his chest loosen. _I don’t deserve this at all._

“I’m not going anywhere. I _couldn’t_ . I know it’s hard because it’s the same damn dance we did. But I really _really_ do love him, Bruce. He’s _it_ for me. I know it in my bones.” Dick said honestly. The acrobat placed a solid hand on his former mentor’s shoulder and squeezed three beats. Bruce nodded tightly, hooded eyes downcast. Dick moved his hand up to gently sift through raven locks, pulling away slowly. _My Wayne men._

Dick looked at Bruce’s form turning against the light of the Bat Computer, the light gleaming off of the black bat symbol on his chest and chasing down his muscled figure. The dark shadows of his suit shrank as he moved closer into the light, bleeding back into the dark cave around them. Bats still flew ahead, as they always did, and the crisp damp air filtered back into Dick’s senses. It felt like nothing had changed, but at the same time _everything_ had changed. _The sky is blue. Gotham is my home. Grass is green. Bruce loves me. The sun will rise tomorrow. Damian is mine._

Dick smiled to himself as he turned to leave. _I’ll let you be._ Although they were much slower than they had been when Dick first came, he heard the computer’s keys clicking again. While walking back to his bike with a lighter heart, something pulled Dick’s gaze. Knee high green boots with red laces sat primly under a nearby bench. _I know who would place those so militantly neat._ Dick looked up at the cave stairs, and couldn’t help wanting to see Damian. Dick checked over his shoulder, seeing Bruce’s profile illuminated from the computer light. _Is it wrong if I go see him? Damn. Probably. Best not to push it._

“He’s in his room.” 

Dick blinked, wondering if he imagined Bruce’s voice. Bruce’s stiff form didn’t betray that he had said anything. _Surely not._

“He’d love to see you, Dick.” 

“Oh. Are you sure? I don’t want to make you -”

“Too late. Now, go. I’d prefer not to go into the details. Leave me be.” Bruce growled. 

Dick grinned. “Love you, too.” A grunt answered Dick, and he bounded up the stairs in search of Damian’s room. _At this immediate and very pressing moment, I have someone to see..._

The mere thought of a sleepy Damian, with ruffled hair and soft skin, a soft voice and a body that radiated heat, and glazed emeralds that would shine when they caught sight of Dick, made his heart pound excitedly. A warm brown canvas of skin against black satin sheets, and all Dick could think was _mine_. Reaching Damian’s room, Dick opened the door slowly, craning his head in, and caught Damian’s slumped form. Dick grinned, slipping off his shoes and pulling off his sweatshirt before slipping in the bed behind Damian. He kissed the nape of Damian’s neck, and calloused hands glided across the younger’s chest. Damian shifted, nostrils flaring with the smell of Dick, and he peeled sleepy eyes open excitedly. 

“Dick?” Damian asked hoarsely. 

“Of course. Were you expecting someone else?” Dick teased. 

“I possess a harem of lovers to sate my desires, so I never know exactly. But I _suppose_ you’ll do for now.” Damian said nonchalantly, scooting back into Dick. Dick snorted, and he bit Damian’s earlobe peevishly. A dark hand came up to bat at Dick’s head in response. 

“It’s very difficult to please me. I require a great many things, and flawless service in the bedroom is of the utmost importance. Besides, you’re not really my type.” 

“Oh, really? And what, pray tell, is the great Damian Wayne’s type?” Dick asked mockingly. 

Damian turned over to look up into Dick’s face, poker face on despite the sleep still in his eyes. The moonlight illuminated his spiky hair, and Dick realized that he must have been sleeping looking out at the Gotham skyline. “Tall, dark, handsome, intelligent, broad shoulders, someone with a lot of issues, perhaps a penchant for justice...certainly a _giant_ cock.” 

Dick let loose his trademark panty-dropping smirk, leering down at Damian. “ _Hello_ , Mr. Wayne, if I may introduce myself. My name is Dick Gray-” 

“Not _you_.” Damian sniffed. “Have you ever heard of him? His name is _Jason Todd_.” Damian said dreamily, the tiniest smile at the corner of his mouth. “Leagues above anyone else. I do so wish he was here.” 

Dick narrowed his eyes and his face soured. _Very funny._ “Well, that type sounds more like your _father_ than Jason, you greedy size queen.” 

Damian scowled, disliking how his teasing could so easily be mirrored back. “Tt. I don’t like your mouth anymore.” 

“Oh? Would you perhaps like it somewhere else? Somewhere a little more...private? I’ll put your harem to shame, Mr. Wayne.” Dick promised heatedly. Damian’s scowl fell immediately, and he looked eagerly up at the acrobat. 

“Okay.” Damian agreed quickly. Dick laughed, eyes crinkling at how _insatiable_ his love was. Dick pulled down Damian’s dark boxers, and Damian’s quickly hardening cock bobbed out. Dick sat back on his haunches, and he roughly flipped Damian. He leaned down, kissing wetly down to Damian’s tailbone. Damian gasped at the contact, throwing a confused look back at Dick. _Oh, my darling. You are so innocent when you take away all that talk._

“I’m gonna eat you out, darling. And then you’re gonna ride my cock. And there will be _no_ mention of anyone else except _me._ ” 

Damian inhaled sharply, and his hands tightened around the satin sheets. Damian’s lean back strained as he rolled his hips, and Dick watched, mesmerized, as the moonlight danced on the Robin’s scarred back. He could see every vertebrae, each sharp shoulder blade, every powerful muscle, all leading to Damian’s tight muscled ass. _You are perfect._ Dick felt his cock pulse and precome soak the front of his boxers. _And you are mine._ Dick growled excitedly, and he relished the way that Damian seemed torn from being embarrassed about being in such an _obscene_ position and keening wantonly. Dick placed rough large hands on Damian’s ass and slowly revealed Damian’s tight hole. Damian rose his hips hesitantly, and Dick leaned forward, licking at his hole with a wide tongue. 

Damian moaned suddenly, pushing back needily. _I knew a good slut like you would love this._ Dick focused, bent on ruining the boy under him. _The night is long, little prince. And I’ve missed hearing you beg for my cock._

“ _Please,_ beloved _. Deeper._ ”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! I think if I look at this chapter any longer my head might explode, so here it is because I can't look at it anymore. We are approaching the end here, I imagine it'll be one or two more chapters, I have a pretty good idea what the ending will look like. it has been quite a ride trying to go through how I at least, think all the bats deal with dick and damian's new relationship especially since theyd be jealous, and it's made me want to write a lot more (outside of this story). but it's been ever more fun to write dick and damian. they really just are my absolute favorites. 
> 
> I hope you still enjoy where I take this clusterfuck of a story! all of them are dramatic and horny for dick and i will go to the grave thinking that

Glass crunched under Damian’s boots, and he ignored the pool of blood that lay under the shards. He had an annoying cut on the back of his leg from one of Riddler’s traps, but he would deal with that later. _Nothing to bat an eye over._ He bent to tie up Nygma a little tighter than necessary. 

“What a droll night. And to think I thought tonight you would actually endeavor to play fair, _Batman._ Brawn doesn’t win over brains every time, you utter fools. I may have lost the battle but -” 

“My ears are bleeding listening to your incessant bleating. Someone as foolish as you, I suppose you can only be so embarrassed.” Damian sneered, ignoring the glare Bruce sent him from across the destroyed room.

“Don’t flatter yourself, stupid bird. I’m on an entirely different plane! I already _know_ you couldn’t - mmph!” Damian gagged the Riddler tightly, shoving him against the nearby wall next to the giant windows. The giant glass room was bathed in a dark blue coming from the opposite building’s neon sign. 

“ _Robin_. Go help the civilians. Don’t be careless.”

“Tt. _Fine._ ” 

Moving to go deal with the cowering citizens still shackled under one of Nygma’s game boards, naturally named _Wheel of Torture_ , Damian tried to control his growing temper. All night they had been pulled every which way, and it was far from the end of patrol. They were at the penthouse of the Bank of Gotham tower. They had been sent on a wild egg hunt to get there and _finally_ catch E. Nygma, better known as the Riddler. On top of all that, Damian had to deal with his incredibly stiff father, who was even _more_ silent than normal. The air between them was painful, the tension thicker than it had been in quite awhile. Damian was willing to bet his arm and leg that the news Dick had told him was more devastating behind the scenes than Bruce had let on, and now _he_ had to deal with the repercussions. _Albeit, this is much better than it could have been._ Damian knew deep down his father must be trying really hard. He knew that save for himself, his father was the least equipped to deal with something so emotionally devastating. 

He had been surprised to learn that Bruce hadn’t actually gone insane when Dick finally told him, and he initially couldn’t comprehend why not. _Knock on wood. Perhaps it’s just late onset._ But after talking to Dick after their... _bedtime_ activities, Damian started to consider why, laying in the dark of his room. He knew exactly how painful it must have been for his father. After years and years of loving Dick, being asked to watch Dick love his son, Damian could distantly sympathize. After all, he was just recently in the same boat, carrying a torch for Dick silently for all of eternity. But while Damian was silently devoted on the grounds that he couldn’t bear to ruin their relationship, his father was bound by such a rigid guilt complex that he had simply never planned on telling Dick period. Regardless, Damian chalked the overall success up to the deliverer; if _he_ tried to tell his father, Damian knew it would not have gone nearly as well. 

“-llo! The other Robins were not nearly as difficult when they saved me. I asked you a _question_.” One of the uglier civilians said, glaring at Damian. Damian narrowed his eyes at the pudgy balding man, who was struggling lamely against the handcuffs. 

“Perhaps it’s a reflection of _you_ that you keep finding yourself in this situation.” Damian said disdainfully. He moved to unlock the others’ handcuffs first, and only when Batman sent a disapproving stare his way, did Damian unlock his too. 

“Superheroes are supposed to be _nice_. Your job is to protect me. I could have gotten _killed_ here and you don’t even care.” The man said angrily. Damian rolled his eyes. _Probably not as much as you want me to, no._

“Head over to Metropolis - Superman will kiss the ground you walk on. We don’t suffer fools here.” 

The man let out an indignant noise, before heading over quickly to the designated spot for hostages. Damian was about to walk back to Batman, before his eyes caught sight of a small snow globe that glinted in the light. The penthouse floor they were in was a modern glass box mainly for photoshoots and an excellent viewing point. The center had a small gift shop that had gotten completely demolished from Nygma’s hurdling body after his father sent him flying during their fight, but clearly some things had survived. Damian padded over, crouching down to look at it. It was a normal snow globe, the mini Gotham cityscape swept in a perpetual snowstorm. A switch on the back turned on the globe, and suddenly the mini buildings looked like they were spouting from the yellow orange lava that was the citylife below. Dick’s face bathed in the city glow flashed in his mind. Damian had taken to sleeping towards the window, looking out at the skyline, every night he couldn’t be with Dick. It felt like they were looking at the same buildings - almost like they were gazing under the same star. Damian didn’t care for the city life like Dick did, but he knew he could meet Dick’s eyes there. _And wherever Dick goes, I go._

“Gordon’s three minutes out. Ready, Robin? What’s that?” Bruce asked, big black boots coming into Damian’s peripheral. 

“Noted. Oh, it’s just…” Damian said absently. His father didn’t move away like he would have hoped, and Damian wrestled with whether or not he wanted to be honest. “It’s just… something Dick said. How it always made him feel happy...he always loved the sky-”

“The skyline. He’s done that since he first came to the manor.” Bruce said quietly. “I didn’t know if he remembered that he loved it so much.” 

“Yes. It just reminded me of him. Like everything does. It’s like...it’s like I see him in everything, even more now than before. I imagine I’ll always look at the world through his eyes.” Damian murmured faintly. Bruce shifted his feet, the silence deafening. Damian felt the back of his head burn with his father’s stare, and Damian shut his eyes embarrassedly. Bruce didn’t say a word, a small exhale from his nose the only indication he was there, before he turned and headed back, his big black boots disappearing from Damian’s peripheral. Damian let the snowglobe roll in his hand before dropping it, feeling immensely stupid for telling his father anything at all. _Idiot. Dick probably wouldn’t even like it._ Damian got up, his face pinched, and followed his father out the window into the night sky. 

They were perched on the edge of the building facing the Ace Chemicals plant, right over the balcony garden. The plants were drooping, heavy with the frost of the night, and Damian berated himself for making things even _more_ stiff with his father. Every instance where he almost said something, he stopped himself by counting the plant leaves. It had worked several times, and Damian almost forgot his oppressively silent partner. Mid counting, Jason pinged Damian’s comm. Damian frowned, glancing at his father before taking it himself. _I know you don't want to talk to Father, but surely you could be a little more mature, Todd._

“Hood. What do you require?” Damian asked cooly. 

Jason’s gritty voice came on. “Evening to you, too, squirt. Tell Daddy Bats that I have personally disbanded that old freak’s plans for an underground sex ring. I got him last week and -” Jason’s voice quieted, like he was placing his hand over the comm. Damian could barely hear Tim’s peeved background voice over the comms, “-re off having sex! _I_ brought him in. Don’t make me tell Bruce the scene we walked into -” 

Jason hissed, interrupting Tim, and Damian couldn’t hear exactly what he said to get Tim to shut up, but he imagined it was colorful. “Tim may have helped a _little_ .” Jason admitted begrudgingly. Then his voice dropped to a whisper: “ _But really, I did all the work. You should have seen him - him, in a sex club! It was morally illegal. Trust me, I was the driving force._ ” 

Jason’s voice returned to normal, and Damian imagined that Tim had most likely heard Jason’s lies anyways. _Sex! I suppose that’s...good for him. Especially for what he’s going to find out soon._ “Regardless, I got the creepy fuck at my warehouse with all of his closest goons, and I have _everything_ on them.” Jason finished arrogantly. 

Bruce rolled his eyes. He had been massaging his temple ever since he picked up Tim’s angry whisper about Jason’s unique side mission - plans involving sex that Bruce _certainly_ did not put in the directions.

“Do you not have Father’s number? I am not your messenger boy, Hood. Just call him.” Damian said, annoyed. 

“Tut, tut, baby brat. Don’t flatter yourself - I would never trust you with my _real_ messages. Besides, I seem to have forgotten his number. Strange...It’s _almost_ like when he forgot _me_ at th-” 

“ _Thank you_ , Red Hood, for the update. I will send Robin to you, while I finish my sweep.” Bruce interrupted impatiently, looking meaningfully at Damian. Damian gaped, irritated that he had to go all the way out to Jason’s stupid warehouse just because Bruce clearly just wanted to be alone. _I am not going by myself to see Todd and Drake for a stupid pickup mission. Not even because you’re heartbroken._ Before Damian could even speak, Bruce pushed off his gargoyle to walk towards the opposite ledge, black cape rippling wildly out behind him. 

“Make sure Hood didn’t rough them up too much. I need all info on the ring before we hand them over to Gordon.” 

_Why do I have to do that? You’re just avoiding me._ “Is this because of what I said about Dick? Or just because you don’t know what to say to me?” Damian asked bitterly. Bruce’s nostrils flared, and he looked stormy, like he was at war in his head with what to say. 

“Don’t put words in my mouth.” Bruce finally said, narrowing white lenses. 

“I _have_ to, if you never say anything!” Damian snapped, trying to get his father to crack.

“Silence is not necessarily indicative of ill feelings. You of all people should appreciate that. I’ll see you at the manor, Robin.” Bruce said quietly, grappling off into the night. Damian kicked out at the vent nearby, wanting to pull his hair out. _I guess I am going to the stupid fucking warehouse._ Grumbling, Damian ran to dive off the ledge to the right, on his way to Jason’s warehouse. 

Upon arriving, Damian tried extra hard to cool his temper before he let it out on Jason and Tim, who of all people, he should be _kinder_ than normal to. Rather difficult, because he _did_ still resent them and prefer to have them far, far away from Dick, but he also did understand how shitty it was. _A rather new development._ Damian was less aware of Tim’s love, since he was very careful, and Damian reluctantly admitted he probably would not know if Tim hadn’t told him that night at the gala months ago. But Jason, Damian was far more aware of it now, and he knew that it would hit him hard. _Especially_ if he recently visited Dick, with the obvious intent to confess his love. Prickly jealousy and guilty unease warred within him, and Damian shook his head to clear these stupid _feelings_. 

Damian slid down the fire escape on the side of Jason’s warehouse, landing lightly on the balcony near the window he always entered in. It was large, opened into the shadows, and Jason had expressed his disdain in the past for Damian using it. _Just because I feel like you could’ve had a less shitty chance at love doesn’t mean I have to be a damn angel._ He slipped in, eyes blinking quickly to adjust to the darkness. 

“How did I know you wouldn’t pass up the opportunity to use my _least_ favorite entrance? Ever so charming.” Jason’s voice hissed out from behind Damian in the darkness, and he felt the hairs on the back of his neck raise. _Goddamn it._ Damian grunted, flipping forward and landing on the metal railing overlooking the central clearance, knees bowed out. 

“Todd. I believe you have individuals I need to inspect and evaluate. Where are they?” Damian asked tersely, warily watching Jason saunter towards him. 

Jason laughed, the distorted cackle disturbing coming from his helmet. “Daddy bats sent you to collect his dirty work. Best behave, on my turf. I’m not in the best of moods, as of late. And you might just be the _last_ person I want to see.” Jason said lowly. 

Damian caught sight of the ripple from the shadows below, Tim entering the clearing and peering up at them both. His elegant face tightened and he looked irritable. “Don’t antagonize him. Nothing’s certain.” Tim said, glancing at Damian carefully. He eyed Damian longer than necessary, and Damian scowled, wondering what Tim could possibly mindread this time. _Play nice. Dick wouldn’t want you to make it worse._ Glancing quickly at Jason, Damian flipped back, yellow cape arcing into the air, and he landed perfectly near Tim. 

“Drake. Perhaps you’d be of more help. Do you know whe -”

Jason suddenly surged forward, vaulting over the railing and landing heavily in the clearing. He took off his helmet, sweaty hair falling over his eyebrows, the white shock a dramatic effect against his raven hair. Dangerous aquamarine eyes pinned Damian, and Damian felt like Jason was looking at him with even more intensity than usual. _What’s going on now?_ Damian swallowed, making his face bored to cover his rising anxiety. 

“No? Wouldn’t want to show my cards like you do, baby brat. Out in the open, your boner for Dickie easy to spot from a mile away, a possessive streak wider than your goddamn thick skull, while you snark and think that no one else is in your own little world.” Jason growled. 

This seemed far more antagonistic than usual. The last time they had spoken, Damian felt like they were on better ground. Clearly, something had changed. The dangerous fire in his eyes was far too blazing to simply be over Damian’s general existence; Damian racked his brain for what he could _know_ . They hadn’t told Jason and Tim, and yet, Jason was acting like Damian had fucked up his royal plans to bag Dick. _You just ridiculed me before. Why are you threatened all of a sudden?_

“Tt. Don’t _call_ me that, Hood. I am not a _child_ , I am fucking seventeen and I have proven myself time and time again. You know better than to question the depth of my devotion.” Damian said coldly. His temper flared up insistently, and he focused very hard not to lose it. It would be so _easy to_ just tell them and gloat. Tell them that not only did Dick love _him_ , and he was Damian’s, but they had _fucked_ more times than either of them would want to be alive to know about. That they could not offer their affections, because Dick was _taken_ \- _forfuckingever_ . Although...the longer Damian thought about it, the more he felt his anger flatline. It wasn’t as good of a feeling as he would’ve hoped when he saw the hurt hiding in Jason’s eyes, or how desperate Tim’s piercing gaze was. _Because you already lost. And you don’t know yet._ Damian disliked the fleeting sense of _empathy_ he had for them, feeling like it was much easier to simply hate their guts and move on with Dick in the sunset. 

“When was the last time you’ve seen Dick, Damian?” Tim asked slowly, cerulean eyes searching his face. _Not good._

“I am not here to discuss Dick, Drake. I am here to _finish_ a mission. Unlike our other company, you are normally able to reign in your feelings. It’s none of your business.” Damian snapped. “Just show me the fucking guy, Todd. Then I may leave you.” Damian finished sharply. Jason gritted his teeth, deciding not to push harder. The outlaw turned, helmet in hand, his leather jacket snapping behind him. 

“I’d gut you if it didn’t give me the headache of cleaning up the mess. Even your guts would probably make my life hell. Stain the floor and all, make me lose my deposit. Plus, they’d be fucking ugly. Follow me, brat.” 

“You would lose before you even touched me.” Damian growled. Tim sighed, and he pushed ahead, black cape billowing out. His Red Robin suit looked even more red under the swinging fluorescent lights, and his lithe form bounded forward while Jason’s hulking frame strode forward. Damian trailed behind, exhaling slowly, irritation pulling his frown deeper, fully intending to cash in plenty of sex with Dick for playing nice. 

They pushed into a dark open room, lined with boxes and various piles of Jason’s things. Tim flicked on the light. The sex ring boss sat tied to a chair in the middle, gagged and clearly beaten, and he struggled madly as soon as he saw Jason. His affiliates Jason had tracked down sat chained to the wall, drugged out and looking decidedly less beaten. 

“I see you missed me, you sick fuck. You have a visitor.” Jason pointed to the struggling man, looking at Damian. “That’s the sick fuck that thinks it’s just dandy to start a sex ring in underground Gotham with little kids. Sick fuck, your visitor’s name is Worst Robin. You will address him as such or daddy’s not going to be too happy. You’re gonna tell him every damn thing he asks you, and then _maybe_ , just maybe, I won’t give you my goodbye present.” Jason said, hooded eyes dark. Damian side-eyed Jason, who grinned slowly, hands splaying out dramatically. 

“On my turf, demon brat.” Jason reminded Damian. He leaned forward conspiratorially to Damian, hand covering his mouth from the trembling man just feet away. “ _I hear castration is in now. I think it’d be an appropriate present, really._ ” Jason whispered loudly, and Damian sighed. Tim looked conflicted, but with the way Jason had a gleam in his eyes that said _this isn’t a joke at all_ , he shrugged at Damian, as if to say, _well, he’s not too far out from left field_. 

“I see. I’ll let you know when I’m done with him.” Damian said slowly, moving forward in front of the cowering man. _Sick fuck, indeed. Preying on Gotham’s underground perhaps wasn’t the best thing to do around Todd in specific._ Jason and Tim left the room, the door closing before popping open a couple beats later. Damian barely heard their hushed voices, and he strained his ears to catch what they were saying. 

“Well, now I don’t know. I don’t know if he knows Dick might -” Tim started, voice low. 

“No. If he did, he wouldn’t waste a fucking second flaunting it to anyone that even looks at Goldie, let alone us. What the brat doesn’t know won’t kill him.” Jason whispered back, his voice getting fainter as they walked away. 

Damian barely caught Tim’s unsure hum in agreement, before their footsteps disappeared entirely. Damian stared at the door, gaze lowering. _They know Dick loves me. But they don’t think I know._ Damian felt a lot of things. He felt _angry_ , that they guessed Dick loved him back and they were actively _trying_ to keep him in the dark. But then, again, he knew _he_ wouldn’t be jumping to tell them if Dick loved them. _That’s different..._ It wasn’t that he despised them as much anymore, because now that he had Dick, he knew how bad missing his love was. How deep of an ache rejection weighed on a heart, especially after years and years of devotion. But while Damian empathized minimally depending on his mood, there was no way in hell he would just let them have Dick. _I have my limits._ Damian did feel a little glad that he had roped in his colossal desire to rub it in their faces, even though it probably would have been glorious. _Glorious, and perhaps deserved. But I am trying to make this easier for Dick, for everyone, if I can. To earn it._ If not for avoiding Dick’s disappointment and proving their rather low expectations of his maturity, it would be easier when they finally found out. If Jason, and Tim especially, could recognize that he did empathize the _tiniest_ bit - enough not to try and antagonize them, then perhaps it would help them recognize how truly devoted he was to Dick’s happiness. _And whether or not I like it, Dick does not want you two out of his life. Regrettably._ The man’s gagged squeals roused Damian out of his musings, and he snapped his head back irritably. Snatching the gag back roughly, Damian looked down at the old man, who was crying. The stench hit his nose and he looked down, snarling in disgust when he saw the man had wetted himself in fear. 

“Jesus, you’re fucking disgusting. You’re all cut from the same revolting cloth. Stop crying. Tell me everything, and about _everyone_ .” Damian hissed, voice dark. The man whimpered, and he looked up fearfully at Damian. “M-my name is Gerald Stone, f-from Stone Tech and Industries. I run an underground mob ring, and I was just...expanding my v-ventures. It’s not like you thi - well, I mean. I -,” The man hyperventilated, eyes darting, sweat running down his large face and down onto his dirty torn up suit. His eyes bulged suddenly and he yelped; “ _Please_ , Worst Robin sir, I don’t want to die, I didn’t me-” 

Damian’s eyes blazed, and he slammed both gauntlets on each chair arm. _Do not tell me you just said what I think you just said._

“I don’t know why you think I am not averse to the means Red Hood uses. In _fact_ , I think his parting gift is an excellent idea. If you don’t want me to break every _goddamn_ bone in your repugnant worthless body as well, then call me by my name. _Robin_ . So let’s try this again.” Damian snarled, crowding the man. _This night can’t end soon enough._

“And stop _fucking_ crying!”

\---

The next day, Damian had passed the entrance to the Cave stairs in the main study upwards of five times, considering going down to train. He was seeing Dick later that night, _finally,_ and couldn’t seem to find _anything_ that would pass the time. He had already gotten off twice, spinning aggressive fantasies in his mind that made his heart thunder and his muscles strain long after he had finished. He had finished all his work with Wayne stock, and all of his academics. He already trained twice, and meditated. Had gardened with Alfred. And yet, he was _still_ bored. _I’ll just train again._

The youngest Wayne doubled back, shifting the clock’s hands to unlock the tunnel. Soundless feet walked down the stairs, and Damian halted as soon as he heard his father’s angry voice. Damian leaned forward, looking out to the training platform and catching his father viciously attacking the heaviest punching bag they had. Damian noticed Alfred standing off to the side, looking as polished as ever, even though he clearly was arguing heatedly with Bruce. 

“-own fault for not doing a damn thing for more than a decade. I already had my reservations, but if this is any indication of your maturity levels, Master Bruce, then you have no one to blame but yourself!”

Bruce was shirtless, the dark bottom of his suit a stark contrast to his broad scarred back. He was punching harder than Damian had ever seen him during training, and Damian knew if he punched any harder, he would have bloody fists. _Is this because -? Dick?_ Damian thanked his light feet; he stopped right before the shadows would have stopped hiding him. 

“But what if I did? What if I just _did_ , Alfred? He would fucking say _no. No!_ ” Bruce growled, and he flipped back to avoid getting hit by the swinging bag’s arc. 

“And you wouldn't get to do a bloody thing about it! You internalize it all these years and let it build up. _You_ pushed Master Dick away, and even when he fell for others, you didn’t bat an eye. But now, when you should be the happiest, you are _ruining_ yourself over nothing!” Alfred snapped. 

“Nothing?” Bruce echoed. “In my _own_ house. He’s fucking my son into the bed when all I’ve ever wanted was to do have Dick _myself_ . This is different. Damian’s not like the others. And I _don’t_ know what to do, because I _am_ happy for both of them, but then sometimes I can’t help but feel like I _lost_. I failed. And it’s so selfish but I can’t...you don’t understand. I’ve never loved anyone else like that.” Bruce hissed, roundhouse kicking the bag and barely shifting his body away in time. 

“Damian is your _son_ , sir! He has finally found someone who loves him _truly_ , and that boy would follow Dick into the very depths of hell. Dick _chose_ him. And you can live a life of what ifs, but it doesn’t change the fact that it doesn’t matter if you never love anyone else like that. Master Bruce, he didn’t say you need to stop loving him. But he is moving _on_ , with your son, who needs your support more than ever. He probably presumes you don’t even care that he’s happy with Master Dick.” 

“You know that’s not true. I am. It’s just….it’s just difficult. I don’t know how to talk to Damian about it. I don’t even know what I could say.” Bruce said tiredly, finally stopping and hanging his head. 

“Then bloody act like it, Master Bruce! Honestly! If Master Dick came and told you, and you told him that you are happy for them, that is your word. Damian is your son, and he has proven himself to be considerably less difficult than you. You are a good man, Master Bruce. Don’t make me knock some sense in your thick bloody skull.” Alfred ordered, primly turning and heading towards the stairs. 

Damian held his breath, paralyzed between heading back and staying right where he was. Before Alfred stepped onto the stairs, he looked up right at Damian, who was very far away considering, and smiled. _What? How can you see me?_ Damian twisted, before realizing that there was no way Alfred couldn’t see him go from the secret entrance’s opening. If Damian moved quickly, there was no doubt that his father would hear him, and then Damian would lose his escape entirely. Damian felt his heart pounding, and sweat lining up his back. Indecision paralyzed him and he waited in the shadows, what he had just heard replaying again and again in his mind. Alfred had defended him, and pulled out of Bruce exactly what he was feeling, all while seemingly aware of Damian’s presence. The butler made his way up the stairs, while Bruce moved to the training bars hulkingly, and Damian waited for Alfred to pass him. Alfred approached him a minute later, sinking into the shadows with Damian, and he leaned in close to whisper in Damian’s ear. 

“Evening, Master Damian. I may be old, but my hearing isn’t gone. I didn’t get the chance to tell you myself - I am happy for you and Master Dick. Your father is too, where it counts. Until later, young sir.” 

Damian blinked, closing his open mouth quickly. He nodded quickly, not sure what to do. _Speak, you fool!_ “I- thank you, Pennyworth. I am indebted to you. You didn’t need to say that in my honor.” Damian whispered back. Alfred’s mouth twitched up, and he moved up to leave the Cave.

Damian sat on the stairs, hidden in darkness, watching his father do countless pull ups on the bars. Next to the very same mats that Damian had performed on just months ago, that started everything. _I can’t believe it’s been so long._ Bruce looked less angry, more sad brooding than his normal angry brooding, and Damian wished that they could just talk normally. If he was like Dick, and could speak his way out of any situation, or read his father in a way he never could. If he was Dick, and could make words soar in the air, caressing any lucky listeners, joining them with his warm smile and kind eyes. Maybe that was why Bruce hadn’t lost it when Dick told him. Because it was _Dick_ . Damian knew that if he was put in the same situation, he would have shattered. And yet, still, he would be drawn to Dick, a willing slave to his tune, and suddenly, words of heartbreak that hurt more than anything still hurt less than _no words_ . And in that moment, without talking, several hundred feet away, Damian finally felt like he understood exactly what his father was going through, exactly _why_ it was hard. Finally felt like they were having the same conversation, with both of them turned towards each other, about the same man. He hadn’t given much thought to what his father would say or think, because Damian had Dick and there was nothing else that could eclipse this new world, but it was nice to _understand_ his father. 

Damian sat, hands holding up his head, dark eyebrows knitted in thought. He watched his father train, pouring out his hurt into the bars, and Damian felt more calm than he had felt all day. Bats flew by overhead, the occasional stray eyeing Damian, but otherwise, he sat hidden in the shadows, watching and _understanding._

\---

The moon finally sank in the night sky, hours after Damian had watched his father, and Dick would be expecting him in Bludhaven soon. Damian slipped into his room, intending to grab his dark tunic with gold lining, because he remembered Dick had mentioned that he loved when Damian wore tunics from his heritage, the green fabric and gold swirls lining his neck. He quickly pulled it out of his dresser and put it on, discarding his black turtleneck carelessly. The wind whipped through his dark room, the tall curtains billowing with the chilly air. Damian looked up suspiciously - he had not opened his window at all that day. He strode towards the window, catching the full moon beyond Gotham’s distant cityscape. A little black box sat on his window ledge, with a card on top stating his name in his father’s neat scrawl. _Father?_ Damian carefully grabbed the box, popping it open and catching the note and wrapped present within. The card read: 

_Damian,_

_I picked this up, for you to give to Dick. I have realized that if I were to trust anyone else with his heart, I would trust you. You have grown into the kind of man that I am more than proud to call my son. Do what I couldn’t do, but better - as always._

_Your Father_

Damian smiled softly, rereading the message again and again. The breath he didn’t know he had been holding spilled out. Brown fingers traced the letter gently, and he could tell by the varying pressure points of the writing that his father had spent a lot of time articulating the right thing to say. _Thank you, Father._ His heart warmed, and his small smile threatened to turn into a grin. Damian folded the letter and placed it under his pillow, along with the polaroid of him and Dick, and he looked at the globe sitting on the ledge, a small replica of the very same thing just beyond it. Making up his mind, Damian grabbed a pen from his art desk and held the globe upside down to write on the base. _To my beloved, Dick. Yours always, Damian_ . Grinning ear to ear, Damian slipped the globe in his bag and looked out at the view one more time. _I’m coming, Dick._ Damian turned, darting out of his room and he ran to go mount his bike, off to Bludhaven. 

\---

The take out boxes laid out on the floor, hastily tossed aside, while Damian loomed above Dick. The night had gone perfect, because he got to hang out with Dick for hours, talking and touching, tucking away each smile and laugh from Dick into his heart. Dick’s stubble was coming in, and the dark shadow had been making Damian feel feral. The acrobat wore dark sweatpants and a white shirt, the shadows emphasizing his form underneath. His hooded ice blue eyes had been warm all night, and Damian felt like he was gonna suffocate if he didn’t see them look dangerously at him. 

They were laying together on Dick’s couch, the TV forgotten, looking up at the ceiling. Dick’s apartment was saturated in warm light, the window in the living room opening into the chilly night. Dick was talking absently about his latest case, but Damian hadn’t been listening at all, instead drinking in Dick’s profile. Damian’s hand was splayed out possessively on Dick’s stomach, and he began lightly brushing over Dick’s dark trail of hair that disappeared under his sweatpants. Until his bold hand had strayed a little far, quickly skimming past Dick’s sweatpants waistband and brushing his knuckles slightly against Dick’s semi hard cock, and Dick choked mid sentence. Damian smirked, his gaze darkening immediately. _Finally. You talk too damn much. You’re in for some teasing, beloved._ Damian pushed up in between Dick’s legs, accentuating the arc of his back and making sure Dick’s gaze locked on Damian’s ass. Damian sat on his haunches, splaying out powerful thighs and sending his own hands up his chest slowly. _Lose yourself in it._ The dam broke in his mind, holding back all of his dirty thoughts that night. Thoughts of Dick eating him out again, his stubble leaving red marks on his ass, of letting Damian suck his leaking cock, of _choking_ Damian, of making Damian come harder than he ever could alone. Damian’s breathing sped up, his heart thundering, and his hands darted over his nipples excitedly. Damian rolled his hips forward, fully knowing that his hard on was obviously showing through his slacks. Dick’s hands traveled over to touch, but Damian’s eyes flashed warningly. 

“No touching. Just watch. Think you can handle that?” Damian’s husky voice challenged. Dick narrowed his eyes; Dick usually took control. Damian could tell Dick was weighing the situation, but then he nodded, and sat back, opening his legs and placing his hands above his head cockily. 

“Let’s see what the Al-Ghul slut can do for me.” 

Damian barely stopped the groan that threatened to spill out in between them. He did not expect Dick to talk like that so soon, but he _loved_ it. It had not gone unnoticed that Damian had worn his tunic, and perhaps Dick had a capability kink as well. Damian did after all, come from two of the most powerful families, with the best damn genetics on the planet. And yet, Damian wanted Dick to use him, like he was some common whore. _No. Focus. Teasing, back to teasing._ It was very difficult to focus when Damian was near Dick at all, but _especially_ when Dick said things like that. _Make him earn it._ Damian’s wandering hands went to the tightening strings at the back of his tunic, slowly untying them and enjoying the breeze on his open chest when the dark green tunic unraveled, the gold pattern gleaming. Dick’s heated eyes raked over Damian’s form, and Damian felt his cock twitch. He licked his lips sultrily, dark eyes dropping to Dick’s very obvious erection tenting his sweatpants. 

Damian pushed up to stand on his knees, pulling black slacks down over narrow hips and around his hard cock, shifting knees to pull the slacks off around his ankles. Damian twisted, flipping to lay on the rest of the couch, defined stomach down and ass up, head looking back at Dick. 

“I can’t come without fingering myself now. I can’t come without thinking about your giant cock, spearing into be and making me a moaning mess. It doesn’t matter what I do, that’s the only way I can finish.” Damian confessed lowly. Dick’s hooded eyes flashed, and he moved to touch. 

“Ah, ah. No touching, beloved. Not yet. How does it feel? To know I would slit anyone’s throat who tried to look at me like this. This is for you, only, darling. No one else _deserves_ me, and yet, you - you reduce me to nothing so easily.” 

Making a show of obscenely sucking three of his fingers, Damian rested his head down and propped his ass up, hole finally obvious to Dick. Damian’s hands snaked down, purposefully avoiding his leaking cock, swirling around his hole teasingly. One finger pushed in, easily enough, since Damian had been practicing himself. A couple pumps and he risked looking back at Dick. Dick’s jaw was harder than stone, and his muscles strained wanting to move. He was actively jerking himself under his dark sweatpants, and a flare of want shot through Damian. He wanted to see _it_ , wanted to see Dick’s cock, wanted to feel it deep in his throat and up his ass, wanted to feel _full_ again. Damian added a second finger, pushing insistently at the resistance, speeding up even though he wasn’t ready. The way Dick was looking at him - his time was limited already, and Damian couldn’t find it in himself to care at all. 

Finally, Dick pulled out his cock, slow drags of his large hand highlighting how big he truly was. The head of his cock was leaking all the way down to his heavy balls, and Damian felt his hole tighten automatically. He pushed his third finger in, pushing hard against the burn, and barely thrusted a couple of times before he couldn’t wait anymore. 

“My Al-Ghul slut. Look at that hungry hole. Still so small, so tight. But so _greedy_.” Dick growled. He fondled his heavy balls, eyes locked on Damian’s ass. Damian’s breathing stuttered, and he suddenly entirely lost the ability to continue his verbal teasing. He locked on to Dick’s cock, and he didn’t _care_ anymore, he just needed Dick inside him _right then_. 

“Well, don’t just fucking stare, come _fuck_ me.” Damian demanded crossly. Dick blinked in surprise, before his handsome face pulled into an arrogant smirk. He stood up, and rested his heavy cock on Damian’s ass. He placed large, slow hands over Damian’s back, coming up to sift through the dark hair on the nape of Damian’s neck, and he pulled suddenly, arching Damian’s back forcefully and making him hiss out.

“You’re in no position to be so demanding, little prince.” Dick said, deep voice filling the room. Damian felt his eyes roll back; with Dick’s forceful hand in his hair and dark voice in his ear, Damian knew he wouldn’t need to touch himself at all. _Perfect. Fuck me. Just fuck me._

“I don’t know if you've earned it…” Dick continued. Damian moaned desperately, he took back everything he just thought, he was _not_ perfect because Dick was taking his sweet goddamn time filling him up. _I was supposed to be the one teasing here._ Damian was about to reply snarkily, but Dick pulled back and skillfully thrusted inside with one snap of his hips before Damian could start, and Damian choked loudly. Dick groaned, head tilting back, and Damian whined at the obscene sound of Dick’s slick cock sliding in. 

“No, please, Dick. Just _fuck_ me.” Damian breathed, pushing back into Dick. Dick grunted, left hand coming down to Damian’s hips and finding their normal spot, already outlined by bruises of their last time that still hadn’t healed. _Hurry. Do it._ Damian made a frustrated whine - Dick was _barely_ moving. 

“Don’t just _fucking_ sit there. _Fuck me!_ ” Damian managed between sharp gasps. His skin prickled, his body stretching to accommodate Dick’s thick cock, and his mind raced, and all Dick was doing was just _sitting_ there. Damian was starting to truly appreciate the smallest of movements he was so deprived of. 

“Why should I reward a slut who doesn’t know his place? You’re forgetting who’s fucking who.” Dick sneered, head bending down to hover behind Damian’s sweat slicked head. _Bastard._ Damian wanted to scream, but he held his tongue, instead rhythmically clenching his hole to try and entice Dick to start actually fucking him. 

Dick looked down at the way Damian’s body swallowed up his cock, _hungrily_ . He snapped his hips forward, driving even deeper in Damian, pistoning out again and again. Damian’s surprised moans rang in Dick’s ears, and he palmed as much of Damian’s ass as he could to fuck _more_ , to fuck _deeper_ . Dick reached down to grab Damian by his narrow hips, never slowing down his driving thrusts, and carried him to fuck him against the wall. Damian’s muscled dark legs wrapped tightly around Dick’s hips, heels pushing insistently against Dick’s ass, asking for _more_ , for _deeper_ . Dick tightened his grip on Damian, powerful arms holding Damian up, and Damian held his arms tight around Dick’s neck, pulling him in for a searing kiss. Brown fingers grabbed Dick’s hair painfully, pulling his head closer. Dick grunted into Damian’s mouth, nipping at dark lips and possessively mapping out his younger lover’s gasping mouth. “You’re always so fucking tight for me, just _me_ ,” Dick breathed. Damian keened, scrabbling for skin to slide against skin. 

“Please, beloved, please, I need it harder, I need _more_.”

That was all Dick needed to hear, and he focused completely on just filling Damian, again and again, hitting deeper, pulling out the most obscene sounds from the normally stoic younger man. Dick watched as his cock disappeared completely, his balls hitting Damian’s ass hard. Damian’s cock was leaking profusely, the dark head looking like if Dick just _looked_ at it long enough Damian would lose it. Dick traced the way Damian’s slimmer cock looked _beautiful_ , like every damn part of his body that just looked perfect, and Dick imagined that this beautiful soul that just wanted to be ravaged so thoroughly by him was so strong and yet so delicate, and his bruising thrusts were sure to break him. Excitement raced through Dick, and he sped up his punishing pace. Damian’s pretty cock bounced with the movements, and his abs tightened the same time he clenched his hole around Dick. Overwhelmed with everything that was Damian, Dick lost himself in his needy voice, raspy with use, begging in his ear, deep moans making Dick go crazy. 

Damian’s normally deep voice always getting higher and needier during sex, the way Damian’s throat bobbed to gasp Dick’s name, the way Damian’s nails dug in his neck possessively, and the way that the wet sound of Damian welcoming Dick’s cock home echoed in the room made Dick’s stomach coil already. 

“Fuck, Damian, I’m gonna come,” Dick grunted, head bowing into the crook of Damian’s neck. 

“Fill me up. Fuck it so deep, make it _never_ leave,” Damian begged. Dick bit down on Damian’s neck, muffling the sound of his groan, and he thrusted one last deep stroke, emptying himself into Damian, his cock pulsing. With the hot flood of Dick’s come, Damian’s abdominal muscles clenched, sweat slicking down with the movement, and he came, cock jerking and spilling between their bodies. His hole spasming over Dick’s weakly twitching cock, Damian panted, feeling overstimulated but not wanting Dick to pull out. Warm come spilled down Damian’s legs and onto the floor when Dick slid out with a husky grunt. Damian slumped against Dick, who carried him into Dick’s bedroom to lay on the cool bed. 

Dick threw a tired arm around Damian’s sweaty back. He traced mindless patterns into Damian’s shoulder, kissing scars every couple of seconds. Damian shut his eyes, basking in the sun that was Dick’s love. “ _I_ was intending on being the teasing one, but you ruined it with your stupid big cock.” Damian grumbled. 

Dick laughed lightly in Damian’s spiky hair, turning his head to kiss the tips of his ears. “I certainly didn’t hear you complaining.” 

“Tt. I was _supposed_ to have a little more restraint, but you took advantage of my momentary weakness.” 

“Patience is not one of your many lovely assets, darling.” Dick teased. “Besides, I wasn’t going to let you fuck yourself that much longer. That would just be torture.” 

“Nothing you wouldn’t deserve, beloved. Now. I desire to be held.” Damian said. _No self control of any kind around this man._ Damian stretched his legs out, and rested his sweaty head on the cool pillow, willing the open window to send in more cool air. 

“I am beyond sweaty and covered in come. But I can think of nothing better.” Dick said, muffled against Damian’s hair. Damian slipped his fingers through Dick’s and pulled his arms close, the scent of Dick and sex flooding his nostrils. Damian exhaled, feeling the familiar pull of sleep that came so easily when he was in Dick’s arms. _Wait - the globe!_

“Oh, wait - don’t sleep yet. I brought something for you.” Damian got up, wincing when he felt come trickle down his legs and his ass protest rather painfully. _Or rather, Father picked it up so I could give you it._ Damian dug through the bag of his things that he left on the floor near the window. Dick leaned back on his forearms, appreciating the way that Damian’s lean body moved effortlessly, muscles moving with the slightest step. Damian’s confident movements faltered as soon as he grabbed the gift, and suddenly he felt shy. _It’s not really anything special. I found it in the Bank of Gotham’s ruined gift store. I thought of you. Here. Damn it. That’s dumb. I think of you when I see everything! What’s so great about this?_ Damian hesitated, feeling stupid. He didn’t really have anything of _value_. Just a little snow globe. 

Dick grinned, noticing Damian’s conflict. “Shush, I can hear your brooding all the way over here. Give it! I’m going to _adore_ it.” Dick promised. Damian shrugged, fingers touching the globe absently. _Just give it, idiot._ Damian cleared his throat, walking forward and sitting on the corner of the bed. 

“Early last night, while Father and I were on patrol, we caught Nygma at the Bank of Gotham’s tower. And this captured my interest. I thought of you, because of what you said about the Gotham skyline, and all. It felt right.” Damian murmured. Dick smiled his gorgeous toothy grin, expecting Damian to hand it off. 

But Damian didn’t, and instead he held it, looking embarrassed. “Father noticed, and I may have...may have talked about you a _little_ . He left, clearly uncomfortable, and I was well, I was _embarrassed_. I was an idiot and left it. Earlier today I saw him and Alfred. At the Cave, and I overheard him talking about us. How difficult it was. But I think I understand him better now. Before I came here, I went into my room and I saw he left me this, with a letter, saying everything he needed to say. Really, I should thank him. I should have grabbed it myself. Here.” Damian finished, handing over the globe slowly. Dick took it, large hands opening to hold it carefully. His eyes lit up and he gasped. “Oh, it’s so pretty. It lights up, too! You thought of me when you saw it?” Dick beamed.

Damian’s mouth twitched up. “Among the many other things I see that make me think of you. But yes. I think of you anytime I see the buildings now. It’s...grounding.” Damian admitted. Dick gushed, surging forward and bringing Damian’s head close to his chest. Dick held him close, looking at the globe lovingly. “The snow, too! I love how they blurred the streets like that, like so much is happening. It’s beautiful. I love it.” 

“You don’t have to exaggerate. It’s not anything special. It’s not indicative of what I _could_ give you, should you want anything.” Damian muttered. Dick chuckled, kissing Damian’s hair. “No, silly. I love it _because_ it’s something simple that means so much. Thank you, Damian.” 

“I didn’t even technically get it, I should thank Father, really.” 

Dick looked up thoughtfully, brow furrowed. “I suppose he meant it as a peace offering, and to show that he is trying. Did he know you heard them at the cave?” Dick asked. Damian shook his head. 

“I guess I didn’t realize that he might put up a front for me when I told him. I should have known he wouldn’t show me how much he was hurting. But you said you understand him, now?” Dick asked, looking serious. He stretched his hand out to place the globe on his nightstand, tilting it just so, so he could have the perfect view when he slept. 

Damian nodded, wrapping his hands around Dick’s middle. “Yes. It is difficult. Hard to explain, but I just _understand_. I’m very grateful that he is trying, for me too. I didn’t think I’d care as much to have his support.” 

“Of course you should - he’s your dad. I’m really happy to hear that. He loves you.” Dick said softly, fingers sifting through Damian’s hair. His long fingers dropped to trace Damian’s dark eyebrows, over his jade eyes, to his pretty nose, and dark full lips. Dick’s roving gaze stilled, and he looked at Damian warmly. “But now I just wanna focus on you. My handsome, beautiful, perfect warrior. Just you - my one.” Dick said, fingers hovering over Damian’s lips. Damian leaned forward to kiss Dick’s fingers, eyes locking. Dick grinned suddenly, looking playful. 

“ _Excellent_ thing we’ve told _everyone_ and everything is settled and we can just dance with each other forever. I’m so happy that’s over with - gosh, that would just be a huge headache.” 

Damian snorted. _I wish._

“Interesting. Because actually, we haven’t tol-” 

Dick groaned dramatically.“I can’t believe if I just ignore it then it’s still real. Lame! Well, I need tons of spectacular sex before I can even think about how I’m an asshole and I should have told J and Tim already. We are going to get stoned alive, little prince. Exiled. Excommunicated from the Holy Church of Jason and Tim. And then stoned again.” Dick sighed. Damian hummed in agreement. _That’s very likely._

“Stones will cascade on my hot, broken body, but at least you’ll protect me, my dear strong Robin.” 

“Are you implying I’m going to take the blows for you? That’s rather presumptuous.” Damian said offended, the mirth in his eyes the only indication he was teasing. 

“A necessary risk. Love is war, darling.” Dick declared, calloused hands roaming lovingly over Damian’s body. 

“Indeed. Well, then let me ask you this. If Mother found out, she would certainly fight you for my love. Would _you_ fight for me then?” Damian demanded, the corners of his mouth lifting. He felt the rumble of Dick’s laugh deep in his chest, and Damian pressed back even more into Dick’s warmth. 

“How you managed to have the most dramatic parents in the world, I’ll never know. Damn, I have to fight _Talia_?” Dick’s lips curled. “Let me think…” 

“It’s not supposed to take that long to say yes. It’s a rather short word.” 

“Don’t worry, of course I’ll answer you.” Dick peeked down at Damian, happy blue eyes meeting warm emeralds. Suddenly, Dick threw his head back, pretending to sleep, and Damian laughed softly, bringing their joined hands up and kissed Dick’s hand, Dick’s exaggerated snores filling his heart. _I’ve never laughed more in the past week than I have in my whole life._

“I love you, idiot.” Damian smiled, muscled legs possessively entwining with Dick’s. 

Dick cracked open an eye and he leaned down to kiss Damian gently on the mouth. 

“I love you, more.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, comments are very appreciated!! they always makes me feel less like im shouting garbage into the void haha. 
> 
> also, if you'd like to, my twitter and tumblr handle is @disguntledwing. just started up, and that's where you can catch any more of my awful ideas or my art. it is a nsfw account, but if you're reading this story, i have a feeling we are on the same page ;)
> 
> thanks for reading :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> second to last chapter, everything is all out there now! I'm gonna post the last chapter tomorrow so I'll ramble more there, but I wanted to get this one out tonight if I could. I hope you enjoy!! Let me know if you like it! :)

They were in the large piano room in the west wing of the manor, with towering windows and shelves lined with books encompassing the room. Tim had been playing the piano, the sad melody soaring through the room and luring Dick in, Damian trailing behind him with light steps. Tim’s eyes had brightened when he saw Dick, immediately darkening when he saw Dick’s shadow. He eyed them warily, but continued playing, and the visitors sat on a large chair nearby to listen. Tim’s slender fingers danced across the piano keys, and cerulean eyes closed to lose himself in the notes. Dick thrummed his fingers against his knee, partly in anxiety, but also to keep the beat of Tim’s melody. Damian sat still, leaning against Dick slightly, jade eyes looking down at clasped brown hands. 

Dick checked the time on his watch, knowing that Jason would be coming by shortly. He _may_ have done some detective work, knowing that Jason would come by and Tim would help him install a new chip in his helmet before they went on patrol themselves. Dick knew that as much as Jason tried to hide it, he hated to be lonely, and Tim had been an increasingly larger part of the outlaw’s life, be it under the guise of new tech or just simply shared company. 

Jason in a good mood was very different from Jason in a bad mood, and Dick hoped that Jason would be in a good enough mood that day. _I know that, and yet, here I am, about to break your heart._ He ignored how it was selfish to want Jason to be in a good mood, just so the blowout wasn’t as bad as it could be. 

Dick gazed out the windows, taking in the deep green of the Wayne estate, the gorgeous collection of gardens and fountains right beyond them. Just barely beyond one of the largest trees, was a small glimpse of the city, and Dick watched the white light of the late afternoon sun reflect off skyscrapers. Dick blinked, tilting his head back to focus on the dark room he was in; the sad melody and stiff form of Tim made Dick want to escape. 

Tim’s fingers finished with a flourish, and he looked over at his visitors with narrowed eyes, expectant. Before he could say anything, Damian cleared his throat, and Tim’s eyes snapped to him. 

“You play Bach well. Continue?” Damian murmured. Tim blinked, eyes darting back between Dick and Damian, as if to say _did Damian just compliment me on something?_ He opened his mouth, and closed it after a beat. He looked strangely at Damian, but when Dick just nodded in agreement, he frowned, slowly turning to continue playing. The melody picked up again, the chords of the piano ringing out within the big room. 

Dick studied him, thinking about how close Tim held his cards, how truly unaware Dick had always been of his feelings. Jason, he could understand a little better, now that he had time to think about it. Their close ages and history, Jason’s fervent idolizing that had morphed into a different, snarkier affection, Jason’s preference for men...But _Tim_ ...Tim had never been obvious. Never broke his poker face, had always been good, reliable, kind Tim that was a constant source of strength in Dick’s life. _You play your cards patiently. But how could the dream really be worth it?_

Damian shifted abruptly, posture becoming stiffer, and Dick twisted to see what had alerted him. A beat later he recognized Jason’s steps right outside in the hallway, and Dick got up slowly, facing the door. Tim swiveled his head sideways, eyes on the door, but his fingers still played absently. 

The tall doors opened roughly, and Jason strode through. “-mbo, you asshole, you didn’t say _which_ piano room to go to. This goddamn house is too big. Just for that, you’re paying for burgers tonight - _and_ I’m getting the double meal, too.” Jason’s deep throaty voice filled the room. He wore his dark gray suit, without his normal jacket, and his thigh gun holsters swung menacingly. There was stubble lining his rough face, and his hair was wind swept, like he had just biked over. 

Dick broadened his shoulders, feet shoulder-length apart, and looked at Jason. Jason stopped suddenly, seeing Dick, and the barest hints of a smile pulled his mouth up. Aquamarine eyes looked at Dick intently, and for the first time - since he knew what he was looking for, Dick could see the way Jason’s eyes lit up for him. 

“Oh, ho, Timbo, you didn’t tell me we had a visitor. Finally crawled out of Bludhaven to hang with the big boys, Dickie? About damn time. Let’s go, all three of us. Dick, maybe I’ll even let you buy me a shake.” Jason grinned, clasping his hands excitedly. 

Tim rose primly from the piano, smoothing over his white dress shirt. He looked stormy, like he was suddenly understanding the complete situation that was unfolding before them. Jason’s roving gaze caught Damian’s slowly moving form from behind Dick, and his eyes narrowed immediately. His form became rigid, and his jaw went hard. “Wait a fucking second.” His eyes zipped between Damian’s stiff silent form and Dick’s imploring expression. 

“Wait. I know what the fuck is going on here. Are you kidding?” Jason hissed, his face twisting in anger. “Actually? I cannot _believe_ this is really happening. Fucking awesome.” Jason seethed.

“Jason, I just thought it would be nice if we all talked. Can we please just do that?” Dick asked carefully. 

Jason looked over at Tim and tilted his head at Damian. “You were right. Demon spawn bagged Goldie, and now he wants my blessing. You really have some fucking nerve. Sorry, but I left the congratulatory gift in the car.” Jason sneered at Damian. The outlaw paced angrily, stopping in front of Damian’s sitting form. Dick moved to step in between them, but Damian pushed him away with his knee. He stood up slowly, eyes locked with Jason’s. Damian’s back was straight in only the way his and Bruce’s could be, and his jaw was tight. Tim moved forward slowly, closer to Dick and Jason than Damian. 

“When did this happen?” Tim’s sharp voice almost made Dick wince. 

“The night I stayed in Gotham, last week. But it’s been a long time coming.” Dick answered quietly. Jason’s mouth gaped slightly, before twisting into a mean snarl. He crowded Damian with renewed fury. 

“So... _what_ ? You didn’t fucking say anything when you came to my warehouse? Why? You wanted to make it that much more dramatic? Don’t fucking tell me it was out of the good of your heart. You’re a fucking _demon_ , you arrogant piece of shit.” Jason snapped, getting in Damian’s face. Dick’s hands shot out, knocking Jason back forcefully. 

“Don’t _fucking_ touch him, Jason. I’m not going to ask you again. You’re the one being dramatic. Just _listen_.” Dick growled, any sense of pleading gone. Jason glared at him, righting himself. Damian exhaled, getting his temper under control - one more second and he would have lost it. 

Jason’s sneer pulled back in a snarl. “What? Are you gonna tell me I’m wrong? That the brat didn’t finally convince you to fuck him? That you looked past both of _us_ ,” Jason gestured between him and Tim, “and honestly looked at him? He doesn’t deserve you. _We_ don’t. But he really _really_ doesn’t.” Jason said fiercely. 

Damian’s nostrils flared, and he glared across at Jason. “I purposefully did not tell either of you to gloat. You don’t have to believe me. But I felt... _empathetic_ . I do not wish to make this more difficult than it has to be. I’m _trying_ to deserve what I’ve been given, and you’re not making this any easier.” Damian said frustratedly, his jade eyes hard. Tim scoffed, crossing his arms tightly and backing off. He looked angry, but more _hurt_ than anything, and Dick lunged forward, trying to grab Tim’s wrist from his retreating form. 

“Wait, Tim, _hold on_ , co -” 

As Dick leaned away, Damian’s words sunk into Jason, and he roared furiously, punching Damian in the face. A distinct crack echoed throughout the large room, and they all immediately could recognize the sound of bone breaking. Damian reeled violently, stumbling back and holding his nose. 

Dick rushed forward to grab Jason, hands closing around his neck threateningly. Tim swore madly and darted forward, bouncing between helping Jason or Damian. Damian crouched on the floor, hands staving off the worst of the blood flow. He looked down, and dark emerald eyes were wet at the edges, but his mouth was tight and pulled back in his trademark frown. Damian grunted, rising slowly and glowering at Jason. Blood was still spewing down his face, staining his dark turtleneck a dark crimson. His nose was definitely broken; Damian looked angry but not entirely surprised. 

Dick’s face was pulled back in a vicious snarl, ice blue eyes flashing and sharp teeth visible. “I told you _not_ to fucking touch him. You’re mad at _me!_ Not him. I swear to God, _don’t ever touch him again!_ ” Dick thundered, and Jason’s face froze with fear. Tim finally pulled Dick’s arm back and he let go of Jason suddenly, who stumbled back, falling against the open piano. The disjointed notes screeched with his weight, and he flinched. Excess energy emanated off of Dick, and he stumbled back himself. Tim stilled him, and Dick’s wild face and fiery eyes fell. _Motherfuck. What was that?_ Dick turned his head, needing to see Damian, and he felt his chest relax fractionally once he saw him, scowling and covered in blood, but otherwise okay. Tim backed away suddenly, after watching Dick look at Damian, and he walked over to help Jason up. Dick stepped forward to hold Damian’s face up and gauge the extent of the damage. Damian sniffed, avoiding his probing fingers, and he pushed Dick lightly away. 

“I’m fine, Richard. It doesn’t matter right now.” _No, it matters more than anything._ Dick opened his mouth to disagree, but then Damian’s slender fingers found his hip and pushed him to look across the room. He squeezed Dick’s hip gently, before moving forwards into the gap between the brothers. 

“Todd - Jason. Tim,” Damian nodded to Tim as well. “I have no desire - well. I have _minimal_ desire to make this more difficult than it has to. I recognize that I have not been...easy to be around. And that truly, you must love him. However, I love him _more_ . You have to understand.” Tim frowned, looking entirely disagreeing, while Jason opened his mouth to retaliate, anger immediately coming back in full force. “I know it doesn’t feel... _fair_ . But I _need_ him. If you were in my place, you would do nothing different.” Damian finished firmly. 

“I would do a few things differently, actually.” Tim contradicted, his tone cutting. Dick’s hand traveled to rest in the small of Damian’s back, and he looked determined, about to speak himself.

“I promise you, I would fucking deserve him more than _you_ would. But of course, Damian Wayne gets _whatever_ he damn wants. You must take cock pretty well to make him look past everything else. Well, Dickie? How does this underage bitch take it to make you fall for him?” Jason cut in nastily. Damian’s eyes flashed, but he shut his mouth tightly. 

Dick shut his eyes, feeling a migraine coming on if he let his rage flare up every other second. _Relax. Don’t make it worse._ “No more, Jason.” Dick snapped, stepping forward. “You’re saying these things because you’re hurting. I _am_ with Damian. I’m in love with him. I’ve loved him for years but I never let myself realize it. I didn’t even notice you or Tim wanted me because I’m fucking _stupid_ . _Damian_ of all people had to tell me about you two. But _I will not_ tolerate you lashing out at him like this.” 

Jason grunted and shut his eyes, looking pained. _I finally said it._ Tim’s face tightened, and he looked off, blinking quickly before tears came. 

Dick stepped forward, trying to keep his momentum.“I’m sorry. I honestly didn’t know, and I am so stupid for not noticing. I just don’t think about people _wanting_ me in such a serious way, especially if it isn’t easy. _This_ isn’t easy. All my other relationships were not...not like _this_ . I’ve struggled not to push it so far deep down, and I’ve isolated _all_ of you by doing that. And I’m sorry. But this is it for me. He’s it.” Dick said. “I love you guys. You guys are my family. My _family._ And I wish you get what you want, Jason.” Jason flushed, looking away and glaring.

“I _wish_ you could make that dream of yours a reality, Tim.” 

Tim shifted embarrassedly, blinking faster and very interested in counting the books behind Dick. “Because I love you guys. And I want you guys to be happy. But I _can’t_ . Not like that. Someone else will. You deserve so much more than me. _All_ of you.” Dick glanced at Damian meaningfully, whose face immediately warped in argument. Dick shook his head minutely, and Damian barely held his tongue. _Not the time, little prince._

As the words settled in the air, Tim closed his eyes and hung his head, while Jason pushed his hands up roughly against his eyes, looking furious to hide his anguish. 

“This is fucking bullshit. I don’t have to sit here and listen to you pity us, while you’re just gonna be balls deep in the brat later and not give a flying shit about either of us. Tim and I - who have been with you since the _beginning_. Who have loved you since the _beginning_ . I _wish_ I could hate you, Dick. I really wish I could. But if you said you loved me back right now, we all know that I’d be so fucking pussy and I would do anything to have you. And that’s not fucking fair.” Jason bit out. Tim nodded, upset. “Either of us. So easy. And it doesn’t even matter. Never mattered.” 

Jason looked back at Tim, face falling, and his face wound up in anger again. “But _you_ , Damian. I hope it’s the greatest thing ever, getting to have him. It’s not like we’ve wanted him way before you even dropped into this cluster fuck of a family, arrogant and expecting a red fucking carpet. Well I guess that _is_ how life works for you, isn’t it? Just get whatever you want. Doesn’t matter that I fucking _died_ and came back, _still fucking loving him_ , or that Tim hasn’t gone a damn day without falling asleep with him on his mind. You just get him, just like that. Guess that’s just fucking life. I’m done.” Jason finished, stalking towards the door. 

Dick’s face crumpled, and he tried to grab Jason’s shoulder as he passed by, but Damian pulled him back. “Don’t, beloved.” Damian shook his head tiredly. The door slammed, Dick slumping, before he turned to look at Tim beseechingly. Tim leaned on the piano, holding himself tightly, looking even more slender with his long legs and tightly held frame.

“Tim? Please. I can’t lose you, too.” Dick said quietly. 

Tim looked down at the piano, his slim fingers coming down to gently touch the keys. He looked up out the window, catching how the sun sank further behind Gotham, and the sky was starting to turn into a pink orange. His raven haired flopped forward, barely covering his wet eyes.

“It’s funny, really. I thought this might happen. I guessed you loved Damian. But it’s one thing to guess, and one thing to actually hear. I thought I was further along in the grieving process. But it’s like watching a car crash in slow motion, but I actually know I’m going to be hit. And yet...it hurts so much more than I thought. Because not only do I look at you, and feel like that dream is shattered, but I see Damian and I realize I just _lost_. All he’s done is take things from me. And maybe I never really owned your heart, really. But I swear I love you like I could.” Tim said sadly. His fingers danced on the keys, not pushing hard enough to make any noise. He straightened, inhaling slowly. Damian shifted his feet, and Dick looked on brokenly. 

“I apologize for before, Drake. I- I do not hate you.” Damian confessed. Tim laughed bitterly, and he turned to look at the man that had haunted his heart for years. 

“Seems like all your good nature is rubbing off on him. He no longer wants me to die, the novelty of it all...I do love you, Dick. But I know that doesn’t matter. Enjoy the dream.” 

Tim walked away, opening the door softly and slipping out, leaving Dick and Damian alone. Dick swore loudly, kicking the couch next to him. He sank down, falling to his knees, hands going through his hair angrily. Damian knelt down, hands coming up to frame Dick’s face. His hands caught on Dick’s jaw rough with stubble, and he ached seeing Dick’s handsome face look so exhausted. 

“They hate us. I know I joked about it, but I didn’t actually think they would. I didn’t realize. I never realize anything in time.” Dick said miserably.

“No, beloved. You realized _us_ in time. There was nothing you could’ve done differently. We knew it was going to be difficult. Perhaps they’ll feel different after some time and space.” Damian suggested. But he knew that if it was him, he never would feel different. It would ache the same, eat away at his insides until he accepted that no matter what, he couldn’t _not_ have Dick in his life. Even if that meant just as a brother. He didn’t think they would just forget about Dick. _It doesn’t matter. He’s mine._

Damian dipped forward, catching Dick’s lips softly. Dick kissed back immediately, as strong and steady as he always had, bringing up his hand to rake his fingers through Damian’s hair. Damian instantly felt his cock twitch, could feel all the blood in his brain rushing down, and once again, he wished he wasn’t so damn responsive. Here Dick was, mourning the loss of his brothers, and Damian was going to be tenting his slacks. 

“I’m sorry. You’re right. I know that, it’s just hard. There’s nothing more we can do, anyways.” Dick sighed, eyes focusing on Damian’s face. “Hmm. There was a lot of iron in that kiss. Let me see you.” Dick’s insistent fingers came up, investigating the extent of the damage Jason had wrought on Damian’s face. Damian let Dick fret over him, glad that it seemed to give Dick something to do other than feel upset. “You need to see Alfred. I think he can fix you right up, but you’ll be sore for a while. That is a lot of blood now that I really look at it...you know, you shouldn’t be able to make _blood_ hot.” Dick said, mouth quirking up as he rested his forehead on Damian’s, looking at the dried blood on his mouth. “Does it still hurt?” 

“Insignificantly. Although, I must admit. Never to Todd, because he would enjoy it too much. But he does hit very hard.” Damian said, jade eyes warming. 

Dick snorted, eyes closing. “Yes, he does. I’m sorry that happened. I wish I saw it in time. I won’t let it happen again. Not if I can help it.” 

Damian rolled his eyes, but smiled softly. “We may have picked a poor choice of careers for that. I’m sorry about them, Richard. I hope they come around for you.” Damian said, fingers dropping down to play with Dick’s button up shirt. 

“I hope so, too. They’re family. Yours, too, even though you don’t think so. But if it means I get to have you, it’s a choice I’ll make a billion times over.” Dick assured. He sighed, nuzzling against Damian. “Okay, we can think about it more later. Let's go try and enjoy the night. Might be better to go to Bludhaven, I’ll see if B will let me take you away again. I _even_ changed the sheets for you, so you can’t complain this time.” Dick grinned, but it didn’t reach his eyes. Damian knew he was putting up a front, trying to hide how hurt he was from Jason and Tim leaving. He knew that Dick didn’t regret anything, but he couldn’t lie and say that he hadn’t hoped it would’ve gone a little better. _We’ve told everyone. It’s just you and me against the world, beloved. It always has been._ Damian smiled, teeth showing, and he nipped Dick’s neck, kissing it quickly after. 

“Your sheets _were_ disgusting. The bar for romance seems to be plummeting every day. However, before we depart, I want to play the piano. Drake does play it very well, but, I must say that I am better. Indulge me?” 

“Thank you for not saying that to him. I’m sure it was _very_ difficult not to say that - I’m _so_ impressed. Lead the way.” Dick said fondly, following Damian to the piano seat. 

“I only speak the truth. Now, sit and take the right side. I know you used to play. See if you can keep up, old man.” Damian said loftily, scarred fingers taking place over the keys. He played a very quick, sharp melody, that seemed melancholy one second and hopeful the next. Dick didn’t recognize it, and he wouldn’t be surprised if Damian composed it himself. He watched Damian play intently, his fingers methodically jumping across the keys. It looked less pretty perhaps, than Tim’s playing, but each movement was more purposeful, far more exact. The dried blood on Damian’s face had started crusting over, and his throat was covered in the dark red stain. His fingers were covered too, the barest hints of blood left behind when he pressed a key particularly hard. Damian bit his lip absently, concentrating on his composition, and all Dick could think of was how damn _pretty_ he looked, even all covered in blood. Damian looked sideways at Dick disapprovingly. _Oops, gotta keep up. You’re just so beautiful to look at._ The melody enveloped Dick, and he tried to find a pattern, tried to see any semblance of the beat he could emulate to join Damian. 

Dick’s hands rose slowly from his lap, hovering over the right side of the piano, and Damian’s fingers slowed down to let Dick study them better. Dick’s fingers played his own version of the melody carefully, slowly gaining confidence when the melodies complimented each other, and he caught Damian’s small smile in the corner of his eye. Dick’s fingers sped up, his long ago piano skills coming back, and he let his emotions pour out into the music, his walls dropping, to pour his energy into something productive. 

Damian’s stiff back looked perfectly military from the back, his feet planted carefully. Next to him, Dick’s slightly taller and wider frame sat more comfortably, legs crossed, and his head nodded along to the notes. The piano room filled with the music the two men wrote, Dick’s relaxed strokes bringing a steady depth behind Damian’s perfect precision. 

\---

Damian crouched, petting the cats behind his favorite art store. He had some time to kill before he joined his father on patrol; he had come out early to feed the cats because they were looking skinnier than usual. A green glove came down to pet the same insistent kitten again and again, while its siblings raced up his back. Damian laughed lightly, twisting to try and pluck them off. Purring filled his ear, and an inquisitive pink nose jammed in. Damian winced, green gauntlet shooting up to grab the kitten trying to purr into his brain. Placing the white kitten down, he grabbed some more treats from his belt and lay them on the ground, knowing that he had probably given all of them too much, but also not caring. The night was wet, puddles everywhere, and Damian let himself relax. 

“-im! Answer your goddamn fucking tracker, you doe-eyed fuck! Poison Ivy is trying to be in my _literal_ _goddamn_ _asshole_ , and I would just adore some fucking _help_!” Jason yelled, Damian’s tracker going off. Jason’s rough voice startled the kittens, and they darted away before slowly inching back to grab the treats. _Todd?_ Damian hadn’t seen Jason at all since he stormed off in the piano room a couple weeks back. He also had very limited contact with Tim, who avoided him like the plague. It didn’t bother Damian at first, but it was starting to border on _not a good feeling_ , which Damian disliked and preferred to ignore. 

“Hood, this is Robin. I am available.” Damian offered, already expecting the nasty reply. 

“ _Robin_? No, I would rather die here. Don’t fucking listen to my calls, asshole.” Jason snarked, out of breath, sounding like he was running very hard. 

“Tt. You called _me_. It does not sound like you have everything under control.” 

“I fucking do if it means I don’t have to see your ugly mug. _Leave me the fuck alone._ ” Jason hissed, before swearing as something hit him from the back. He swore loudly, panting loudly into the tracker. “Fuck off, brat!” Jason snarled, ending the call. 

Damian knit his brow, weighing his options. He could let Jason die, in a probably incredibly violating way, but wouldn’t have to deal with him after he had made it crystal clear he wanted nothing to do with Damian. Or, he could help Jason, who would probably be completely ungrateful, and probably hate him even _more_ for saving him. Damian sighed, rising up after petting the kittens one last time. 

“Stupid idiot.” Damian mumbled, but he wasn’t that sure if he was talking about Jason or himself. He took off running, grappling up to the next building’s balcony, shooting off into the night towards Robinson Park, where Poison Ivy had last been spotted. 

\---

Damian’s eyes widened, seeing the extent of Poison Ivy’s havoc. The large greenhouse the Wayne foundation had paid for was filled with flailing green limbs, sharp thorns as big as Damian’s arm, cutting across the glass. Robinson Park, and the greenhouse by extension, was between South Gotham and Central Gotham, and while the park itself was beautiful, the surrounding areas were impoverished and frequently filled with crime. The greenhouse was tucked deeper in the park, a giant glass fortress that protected Gotham’s most vulnerable plants. Unfortunately, it also often attracted Poison Ivy. Last time Damian had checked, Ivy was in Arkham, but that never was that promising to rely on. The greenhouse was fogging up quickly, and Damian squinted, seeing a red helmet run from one side to the other, guns lighting up with shots. He swung through the park’s trees, looking to enter the greenhouse from the top and drop down. Damian landed neatly on the roof, and poked his head down one of the escape routes to see exactly how Jason was faring. 

“You’re hurting my feelings, Hood. Didn’t the Big Bat teach you gallery of rogues some manners? It’s _rude_ to shoot at a lady.” Poison Ivy said sultrily. She held up her arms, and green vines shot out from the ground to chase Jason. 

“You crazy fucking green bitch! I’m horny, but not _that_ horny. Go fuck yourself with a goddamn redwood. Let me the fuck out!” Jason yelled, gunshots killing a vine where two more would shoot out. “Fuck!” Jason scrambled back, slashing out at the vines, looking for any way he could get out. 

“Why aren’t you collapsing? My pheromones aren’t working - that can’t be. Is Mr. Tall, Dark, and Angry in love, or just gay?” Poison Ivy jeered, irritable, pushing her arms forward to try and trap Jason in a corner. 

“I am _bi_ , green bitch, and that’s none of your damn business. Your shitty plant perfume is bullshit. I’ll fucking shoot all your stupid plants, I don’t give a fuck.” 

“Batman isn’t nearly this insolent. That man knows how to get a girl going, and I do so wish he came instead of _you_. Too bad I don’t care about him enough to keep you alive. Sorry, darling. Men in dark suits, all you all are is trouble.” Poison Ivy grinned madly, sending a giant venus fly trap up through the ground in front of Jason. 

_Shit, gotta go._ From the open escape on the roof of the greenhouse, Damian threw down blinding gas bombs, and sent some follow up batarangs for good measure. He crouched, unsure if he should go down or just try and get Jason out. Poison Ivy was a formidable foe, and his father would not be too pleased to hear that he had tried to go toe to toe with one of the most powerful villains in Gotham. _Plus, Todd isn’t looking that good. He’d be of even less help than normal._ Jason looked ragged, his suit torn to pieces, and he was struggling to reload his gun. Nasty red gashes covered his chest, and he looked wild. Damian jumped down, landing heavily, and he twirled around, his cape covering Jason’s injured form. Vines shot forward, and Damian flipped up, avoiding the worst of them. A smaller vine lines with thorns ripped across his side, and with every movement he felt the lodged thorns prick painfully. 

Grunting, Damian unsheathed his katana. The giant venus fly trap charged forward with a screech, and Damian ducked barely in time, sweeping his katana under to slice one of its larger leaves. The blinding gas prevented Ivy from seeing him, but Damian knew he was on a timer if he wanted to get out with Jason. Twisting away and cutting through incoming vines, he shot his grappler to pull the reeling fly trap lower. Pulling tightly, he dove forward, thrusting his katana deep in the screaming mouth of the monster, dragging it down and avoiding the acidic blood that sprayed out. The monster screamed louder, and Ivy screeched in pain. _No more time._ Damian retracted his katana, jumping back in front of the corner Jason was in. He checked back, and Jason was weakly loading a new clip, looking like he was closer every second to passing out. The gashes on his front were soaked with blood that spilled out on the grass. Damian snapped his grappler back, darting back to haul Jason up. Jason groaned, finally lifting his head to take in Damian completely. 

“Hood. We are leaving.” Damian breathed out, aware that the cloud was dissipating quickly and Ivy was going to retaliate soon. 

“Oh, _fuck_ you! I told you not to come, you piece of shit.” Jason growled. Jason looked around them, where green plants were lunging towards them with renewed anger. “Goddamn it. I lost my grappler, otherwise I would be _fine_ by myself. Hurry the fuck up already then.” 

Damian aimed up at the tight square he had dropped from, and he shot the grapple, relieved that they were gonna leave without Ivy realizing. 

“Laters, you hideous weed! My cock didn’t even get hard _once_!” Jason roared down, two more large venus fly traps tearing through the ground they were at a moment prior. Damian hissed for him to shut up, but Jason cackled, as they zipped up, spilling awkwardly on the roof. 

“I swear to God I’ll push you back there myself if you don’t shut the fuck up. We need to get out of here _hidden_ and _without_ attracting attention, you absolute fool.” Damian snapped. Jason collapsed, red pooling on the glass and staining Damian’s green boots. _Oh, fuck._ Damian grabbed Jason by the middle, hauling him over his back, grateful that Jason had passed out after his annoying outburst so he wouldn’t have to wrestle an angry, bleeding Jason to safety. He ignored the chaos underneath him, as Ivy tore through the greenhouse to find Jason. Damian struggled forward, galloping oddly, trying to carry Jason lightly so Poison Ivy didn’t hear his footsteps. He slowed near the decline, inching off to hold on with one arm, spilling down on the grass awkwardly as his arm shook violently with Jason’s dead weight. He risked a look at the greenhouse, seeing the clouds dispersed almost entirely, and he could hear Poison Ivy’s furious shrieks. The Robin shook his aching arms, leaned down to haul Jason up again, and quickly headed into the shadows towards the streets. 

He collapsed in the nearest alleyway, shoving Jason’s heavy body off. _You big, heavy dolt._ Damian panted, trying to catch his breath from carrying Jason for so long and so quickly. _Unappreciative ingrate._ He looked disdainfully at all of Jason’s blood on both of their uniforms, and he tried to ignore the rising sense of _I need to help more_ that felt uncomfortable. He nudged the out cold Jason, sighing when he realized he would definitely need to help him out a lot more. 

Damian sat down, fishing for his first aid kit, and set to work on dealing with Jason’s worst injuries. The gashes were deep and laced with thorns, and Jason struggled unconsciously when Damian disinfected the deep wounds. Jason’s red helmet was thoroughly scratched, partially broken at the jaw, and Damian could see that Jason was sweating bullets under it. It hit Damian suddenly how easily Jason could’ve died, how he _still_ wasn’t looking that great right there. Mostly, Damian had saved him because he knew the family and Dick did not want Jason dead. Certainly not because he didn’t actually want Jason to die. _Right?_ He wanted Jason to eat his words, or punch _himself_ in the face, or finally relent and just give up on Dick, but maybe not _die_. He pushed that weird feeling down, and focused on trying to dress Jason’s wounds as best as he could. He’d need Alfred’s careful hands, ultimately. After he bandaged Jason completely, he set out to dress his own small wounds, gritting his teeth trying to get out all the stubborn thorns that he certainly did not need to get that night. 

Damian tilted his head against his shoulder, clicking on the tracker to call Tim. “Red Robin. This is Robin. I have Hood, who needs to be transported back to the Cave. Looks fairly serious. Robin out.” 

“...Robin? You have Hood? Why?” Tim’s suspicious voice rang in the alleyway, and Damian bit his tongue before snapping. “I’m sending you my location, Red Robin. If you didn’t delay, that would be excellent.” Damian terminated the call and sent his coordinates, looking down at Jason. He exhaled slowly, letting all the adrenaline sink out from his body and into the cool pavement underneath him. _Waiting game._ Damian practiced breathing deeply, trying to relax and empty his mind, keeping an eye on Jason, as he waited for Tim to come. 

Jason’s throaty voice choked out, and the feedback from his helmet and the open hole in it combined for an unpleasant sound. “God. Aren’t you supposed to wake up and see someone beautiful? Ugly brat. I could not have had anyone worse save me.” 

“I would think that the Joker would be a pretty high contender. You’re welcome, asshole. I nearly broke my back carrying your dumb ass. What were you even doing with Ivy?” Damian snarked out before he could think, and he partly regretted being antagonistic immediately. Not because he didn’t want to, because he _did_ , but because all he did would mean nothing if he just saved Jason to fight with him. 

Jason surprised him with a snort, and he tried to push himself up, only to fall back with a groan. “There’s that prissy little bitch. What’s wrong? Dick’s cock hasn’t magically made you into a perfect little angel? I would have beat your ass if Dickie didn’t pop a blood vessel pushing me off. I picked up a lead that ended up being a trap, you gremlin, not that it’s any of your damn business.”

Damian narrowed his eyes, forgetting all thoughts of _I would not want you to die_ immediately and wanting Jason to choke. “Don’t make me laugh. Maybe, have you considered, in that astonishingly empty head, that I did not retaliate on purpose? Like how I didn’t tell you immediately? I am not bent on ruining your life, Todd, though it looks like you’re thoroughly capable of doing that yourself. You’re not that important. Don’t flatter yourself.” 

Jason grit his teeth, head tilted back to the brick wall. “Okay, never mind. I don’t want prissy bitch Damian back. I would like ‘I’m trying to deserve him!’ and ‘I have this weird feeling called empathy for you peasants!’ back. I don’t know what part of you I hate more. I hope I shattered your stupid nose.” 

“Don’t be ridiculous. You don’t even punch hard.” Damian sneered, very much lying. His nose still was a little sensitive, even though Alfred had done his best. But Jason didn’t need to know that. 

“God, I can’t stand you. Why the fuck did you save me? I’m not gonna turn into some cheerleader who swoons for you and Dick, not if you save me a zillion times.” 

“Have I said _anything_ like that? No. Do us both a favor and shut up.” 

“I’m trying _very hard_ to be able to stand being a couple feet away from you. I’ll blame it all on being delirious later. I still hate your guts, brat.” Jason said meanly, breaths coming out harder from the exertion of talking. 

“Gold star for you. Drake is coming soon, and then we can forget this ever happened.” Damian said tiredly, massaging his temples. Jason’s breaths came out harder, his head rolling, and Damian saw that he had started shivering all around. _That’s not good._

“Okay, okay. I’m definitely delirious. And maybe seeing you makes me think about him when all I’ve tried to do is not. But humor me, demon brat. Tell me what he’s like. I just want to think about him. I don’t have anything. Give me the goddamn deets and I’ll shut up. I haven’t been able to fuck anyone without crying.” 

_Um, ew._ Damian closed his eyes, hoping that Jason just passed out right there and Damian never had to imagine Jason crying during sex again. Jason grunted irritably, catching Damian’s disgusted face, and his bloody hand surged to lock onto Damian’s ankle. _Nosey ass._ Damian’s thoughts traveled to Dick. His pulse picked up, and he felt the familiar pull of his stomach. 

“Tt. I don’t know what you want me to say.” 

“Don’t play dumb. Tell me what he’s _like_ , squirt. Don’t be stingy just because you got lucky.” Jason said raggedly, the feedback of his helmet turning into static. 

“I don’t know why _you_ deserve to know. But, well...He is rather...rather large.” Damian said weakly, wondering why he was embarrassed. He could not be talking to anyone more crude, who also was most likely never going to remember this, and yet he felt shy. He didn’t get to talk to anyone about Dick, which he didn’t care that much about, because he got _Dick_ , but it helped him process everything to actually talk about it to someone that wasn’t either Dick or himself. 

Jason hummed in agreement. “There we go. Keep it going. Go on.” 

Damian felt the foreign feeling of wanting to _tell_ , to divulge, to someone just because. He _wanted_ to talk about Dick, and really, Jason wouldn’t remember this. There was no real loss in telling Jason, and he would shut up until Tim came. _That’s right. Why not? He won’t even remember, he’s passing out so much._ “Feels like he could split me. He’ll say the most depraved things. Things I would slit someone else’s throat for thinking. And yet, it’s _addicting_. He could say anything, and I would do it. There’s nothing else like it.” Damian continued, losing himself in it. 

Jason moved his head to the side, and sweat pooled out of the helmet onto the pavement. He looked pale, and unwell, but eager. _Drake’s taking his sweet time._

“I _knew_ it. I knew Goldie would be a freak in bed. Go- d, you’re a litt’ shit. I don’t know if I want you to sto - stop talking or tell me everythin’. _Tell_ me...it’s somethin’ I always fantasize - have you ever come witho’t, uh, without him jerkin’ you?” Jason slurred, but his hold on Damian’s ankle tightened insistently. 

“He never has to.” Damian admitted quietly, his mouth twitching up into a smug smile. Jason moaned grumpily, and Damian held back a grin. 

“Fuckin’ dick. Of cou’rse, of cou- _course_. I hope you kn -know how goddamn lucky you are, Dami’n. I could punch you again. Punch tha’ smile righ’ in. In fact, I -” Jason mumbled, incoherent. 

“I do.” Damian answered honestly. 

Jason’s head fell to the side, and Damian saw he was out cold again. _There, easy._ Damian picked out the tightly wrapped heat blanket from the first aid kit and placed it over Jason’s shivering form. Just when he was about to ping Tim again, he heard movement from above him, and saw the glint of Tim’s bo staff in the moonlight. _Fuck. How much of that did you hear?_

“I know you’re there. You insult my hearing.” Damian announced. He heard an irritated scoff, and he blinked boredly as Tim’s lithe form landed carefully in front of him. Tim looked up at him through narrowed white lenses, his red suit looking almost brown in the dark. 

“What the hell happened here? What happened with Hood? Did you have something to do with it?” Tim demanded angrily. _Me? What the hell?_

“Hood had a run in with Ivy. I helped him. That’s it. Get off your damn high horse. I didn’t do anything to him.” Damian growled, getting up quickly and putting his first aid kit back together irritably. _See if I ever help you two assholes again._ Damian’s hands stilled over the heat blanket on Jason’s form, and a voice inside him told him to just _take it_ because they didn’t deserve his help. But his hands hovered, and he pulled them back crossly. _Keep the damn blanket. You probably made it gross, anyways._

Tim’s piercing gaze followed his every movement, and he looked confused for a second, conflicted, before his poker face slid back on. He leaned forward, carefully holding Jason’s head, and picked the blanket up to see the damage underneath. 

“You- you stitched him up. With your own stuff. When he was injured.” Tim said inelegantly, a rarity for him. He looked intensely up at Damian, who scowled and looked away. 

“Congratulations, you have eyeballs. The jury was still out. It doesn’t mean anything. I have to go do more important things, anyways. Don’t tell him I was here, if he doesn’t remember.” Damian demanded, his domino mask crinkling with his angry face. 

“Why?” Tim asked slowly. Damian turned to go, his skin itching with these new feelings of _contact_ with the two people that he thought wouldn’t ever talk to him again. 

“Why _what_?” Damian demanded hotly. 

“Dick isn’t here. I don’t understand why you would help Jason. Or tell me. I don’t understand that. You already won. You have no reason.” Tim said carefully, locked on Damian’s face. Damian looked away uncomfortably, trying to look casual. But Tim’s gaze was so _sharp_ , so knowing, that Damian felt pinned to the spot. Felt like his poker face was falling, and like he really should just ignore Tim and leave. 

“Contrary to popular belief, I do not loathe either of you anymore. _Most_ of the time. I’m not _purposefully_ trying to make your life hell. I’m trying to...for Dick. To be better. Not like it matters to either of you.” Damian muttered. “I have patrol. Keep the stupid blanket.” Damian turned, voice falling. 

He grappled onto the building to his right, feeling like he was gonna suffocate if he didn’t get out of there _right_ then and leave Tim and his probing questions behind. He breathed out once he was a couple buildings away, and he chanced a look back at the alleyway. He saw Tim holding Jason on his back, looking right at Damian thoughtfully. Discomfort prickled Damian’s skin, and he jumped off, skimming across the glowing roads of Gotham to shoot out into the dark night. He pinged his father, wanting to go back to being his silent, snarky self and not feel out of his own skin with whatever niceties that had happened back there. 

“Father, this is Robin. Meet at Clock Tower for patrol?” 

“Affirmative. Everything alright?” 

“Yes. I’d just like to get on with patrol.”

“Agreed.” Bruce’s deep voice followed Damian as he cut through the air, and he was thankful that his partner wouldn’t pry. Damian ignored the feeling of frustration that they still wouldn’t see that he was trying. Did he have to save their damn lives a billion times over? _Well, I’m not doing that. I’ve shown I can change. It’s on you two to get your shit together. Even Father did._ Damian shook his head, trying to clear his mind. He closed his eyes and tried to enjoy the cool air on his face, the wet mist of rain that smelled earthy, and the fact that he shouldn’t give a damn what they thought. He had Dick, his father didn’t hate him, and he was Robin, damn it. _That’s all I need._

\---

Dick groaned, turning in his bed. His body felt like it was gonna incinerate, and he was sweating all over. As soon as he moved, Damian’s hands tightened around him, his vice-like hug getting even tighter. Dick looked down, Damian’s sleeping form hanging onto his chest. He carefully leaned back, trying ever so slowly to remove Damian’s hands and replace his pillow in his spot. Damian grunted in his sleep, his soft face turning grumpy. Dick stilled until Damian relaxed minutely, and he tiptoed out of his bedroom to the living room, closing the bedroom door behind him. 

Dick exhaled, stretching his arms. He checked the clock on his microwave - 2:33 AM. _Hm. I didn’t get to sleep that long at all._ Bruce had let Damian stay in Bludhaven, having Tim patrol with him. Dick didn’t particularly imagine Tim wouldn’t put two and two together and realize where Damian had gone and why. Didn’t take a genius, and well, Tim was one already. Dick got some water from his fridge, leaning back on his counter and relishing the way all of his body heat seeped out. Dick didn’t want to wake Damian up, because if he was being honest, none of them got enough sleep, and he knew Damian didn’t rest nearly as well as when he stayed with Dick. But Dick was _awake_ awake, and he couldn’t feel himself sleeping again anytime soon. Dick finished his water, and with one last look outside, turned to go back to his bedroom to read and cuddle with the youngest Wayne. 

Dick turned the corner of his kitchen, and he almost walked straight into Jason, who shot his hand out to cover Dick’s yell. Dick’s nostrils flooded with Jason’s sharp aftershave, and he glared at Jason. He hadn’t seen Jason since he had told him and Tim, and Dick had almost given up hoping to save their relationship. Jason’s face looked even rougher, his stubble coming in bristly, and he had a new scar on his jaw. His dark eyes looked fervently at Dick, and he looked crazed, like he had been drinking. He was wearing his brown leather jacket over his dark gray suit. Dick lunged back, looking expectantly at Jason to explain what the hell was going on. Only then did he notice Tim’s slightly embarrassed face in the background, near the window. Tim looked tired, the eyebags under his eyes more prominent than usual, and he smiled awkwardly at Dick. His hair looked sweaty and matted, and Dick noticed his Red Robin hood pushed back. Dick had seen Tim once on patrol since _that_ night, but he had been incredibly guarded around Dick. 

“ _What the fuck is going on? Did you lose my goddamn number? That’s better than scaring the shit out of me during a late night house visit._ ” Dick hissed, keeping his voice low. He sensed it would be better if Damian wasn’t a part of whatever was going on, and he didn’t want to stress Damian out even more. That, and a soft, hair sticking everywhere, topless, vulnerable Damian would feel exceptionally bare around Jason and Tim, and while he had done an amazing job not antagonizing them, asking him not to in this situation was not really that fair. 

“ _Sorry. We wanted to catch you when you were alone.”_ Tim whispered back, shrugging. 

Dick narrowed his eyes, stepping back. “ _For what? If you’re not looking to talk, then get out. I’m not doing anything else.”_ Dick said testily. Jason rolled his eyes, looking annoyed. 

“ _No, you ass. We want to talk. I mean, we would in fact like to do more. Kidding, just kidding! God, you’re so uptight._ ” Jason added quickly, seeing Dick’s face darken. Tim nodded in agreement. Dick looked skeptically at them, chancing a glance at the closed bedroom door. He waved Tim and Jason over to his balcony irritably. 

Once they were outside, Dick instantly regretting it because he was just in boxers - _damn, I gotta stop doing this_ -, they leaned against the metal railing, looking down below them. The green sign of the cornerstone drug store shone brightly, and one of the lamplights sizzled out, disrupting the orange glow under them. Dick turned to his brothers. 

“Well? The floor is yours, boys.” 

“Don’t sound so excited, Dickie bird. Look. We came because I wanted us to do the mature thing and apologize.” Jason said confidently. Tim gaped, looking at him angrily. “ _No_ , that is not right. Jason was drinking and ranting, while I had to pull his sorry ass up from a pile of his own vomit. Then _I_ was the one who said we should come and talk to you.” Tim finished, voice losing confidence as he went on. He looked away, seemingly unsure what to say next. 

“Jason.”

“Yes, Goldie?” Jason said absently, eyes looking intensely down. 

“Eyes. Up here. My eyes are up here.” Dick said flatly, regretting his lack of attire more than ever. Jason blinked, dragging his eyes up from Dick’s bulge to meet Dick’s resigned face. 

“Oops.” 

Dick sighed, moving his hands down to cover his boxers. “Okay, _anyways_. So, talk to me. Tim?” 

Tim hesitated, looking sheepishly at his boots. “I’m sorry, Dick. I still don’t like it. But, I can admit that Damian is trying, now. I saw him save Jason when he had no obligation to, and it just didn’t...I couldn’t reconcile that with the person I made him out to be in my head. Or that he didn’t try and hurt us with it. I still don’t like him. But I don’t want to lose you. And so I’m asking if you’ll take me back as your friend - your brother, even if I still have that dream.” Dick’s face softened, and he opened his mouth to reply. Jason hummed, interrupting, and put a hand up to talk himself. 

“He’s right. Your dumbass boyfriend saved my ass recently, and I guess maybe just _perhaps_ he isn’t the worst shit stain on the planet. Close, though. And I do -” Jason stuttered, frowning to cover his embarrassment. “I do miss you. And I’ve had a lot of time to myself. I don’t want to lose you in my life, even if I lose you to that brat. Even if I fucking hate seeing you with him, he’s not as bad as I thought he was. Plus, he told me about your cock, which is like _great_. Maybe I can train him to be my mole and I can hear all the damn deets we’re missing.” Jason smirked, but it didn’t reach his eyes. 

_Oh my God. What._ “Um, I do not kn- what? My _cock_ ? I don’t, what? Actually. I don’t want to know. But, yes. Of _course_. I miss you guys. I _love_ you guys - you guys are my family. It means a lot to me, that you’ll try. I really am so happy with him. He’s - he’s mine. My everything. I don’t want to lose my brothers, if I can. Thank you, Tim and Jason.” Dick smiled softly, reaching forward to hold onto their shoulders firmly. 

Tim’s mouth twitched up and he leaned into Dick’s hand, while Jason brought his hand up to Dick’s bare shoulder, squeezing him back. 

“How long did you guys wait to tell me? Did you just come from Jason’s?” Dick asked, curious. Tim flushed immediately, looking away. Jason grinned, his eyes looking wickedly at Dick. 

“Oh, Dickie, I don’t know if you want to know that one. I, myself, am a repeat offender, but Timmy boy here is a first timer. I’m not sure if he’d want me to snitch.” Jason laughed lowly. Dick furrowed his brow, looking quizzically between the two. _What the hell does that mean? Wait._

“Wait a second. How long have you been waiting to get me alone? Damian and I were asleep when you got here, right?” Dick asked slowly. Tim stared pointedly away from him, and Jason’s lewd smile told him the answer. 

“You _watched_ us? You watched us have _sex_ ?! What the actual _fuck_ ?” Dick cried out disbelievingly. _“Are you kidding?”_ Dick yelled out, hands going up to pull at his hair. 

“I’m sorry! It was _Jason’s_ idea, and anyways, he’s done it more times than me!” Tim said quickly. 

“Okay, and? Dick, my dear brother, it really is a small price to pay to get your brothers back. _Yes_ , I saw you fuck the absolute shit out of the little squirt. Did I manifest a blind spot where his dumb moaning head was? Of course. But, I am your brother again, and I really don’t think it’s that big of a deal. From what Damian sounds like during sex, I’m sure he’d probably be into that kinky shit, having us watch. Jealous little twerp, and _really_ when you think about it I wou -” 

Dick stepped forward, hand covering Jason’s mouth, his eyes ablaze. “Do not. Do not fucking watch us. Get off my balcony. Go have a good night, _away from Bludhaven,_ and then we’re good. But no more talking about him like that, no more goddamn watching, and _no more looking at my fucking cock._ ” Dick growled out, and he spun around, walking back into the apartment and locking the balcony door behind him, his handsome face frowning out at them. 

“ _Goodbye_ , boys.” Dick mouthed out dismissively, and Tim waved back nervously. Jason scowled, turning and leaning his weight on his forearms on the railing. 

“Jeez, what a damn killjoy. Although I love when he gets that look in his eyes. But he’s a little bit of a dick. Ha. Get it, Timbo?” A cuff on the head answered him, and Tim glowered at him. 

“Idiot. Why the fuck did you say anything? I’m never listening to you again. You’re so goddamn horny and you make the shittiest decisions, and for some ungodly reason, I thought it wouldn’t bite me in the ass.” 

Jason climbed up on the railing, aiming his grapple up. “Gave you a boner though, didn’t it? Peeping Tom, peeping Tim, tomato, tomahto. Besides, it’s how I cope with the overwhelming sense of rage that I’m gonna have to watch the brat live happily ever after with our boy. You gotta let it out somehow, kid.” Jason shrugged, shooting his grappler and zipping off across the chasm. Tim sighed, pulling his hood back on and getting his own grappler. 

“Somehow, I don’t think that I should take emotional advice from you, Jason.” 

“Blah blah, you virgin.” 

Tim’s sigh followed them, as the brothers chased each other off into the night. Dick took one last look at his brothers getting smaller and smaller in the distance, before he pivoted back towards his bedroom finally. _Got my brothers back. Even if they’re terrible._ Dick twisted the bedroom door’s knob slowly, opening the door carefully. He saw Damian sitting up, his hair adorably sticking up in the back, his skin looking soft, but his eyes were wide awake. _You don’t look very sleepy._ Dick stepped forward, gingerly sitting on the bed and scooting closer. 

“Hello, darling.” Dick said affectionately. 

Damian’s fingers twitched, and Dick moved to intertwine their hands. “I know better than to assume you didn’t hear anything. Am I right? Nothing gets past my beautiful boy. Not with those bat ears.” Dick said softly, bringing up their hands to kiss Damian’s fingers. 

“You are.” Damian said quietly, mouth twitching up briefly. 

“Tell me anything, and I’ll do it. If you don’t agree with what I said, I’ll take it back. Anything.” Dick promised. Damian closed his eyes, finally relenting and pushing closer to Dick, climbing in his lap. He placed his head on Dick’s shoulder, muscles legs wrapping around Dick’s hips. His hands traced the scratches on Dick’s back he left only hours earlier, slowly running them up through Dick’s soft hair. 

“No. I should be glad that they apologized. That they’ll stay in your life.” Damian rasped, holding Dick tightly. “But, I don’t want them anywhere near you, not looking at you like that. Not so blatantly. Not looking at us fuck, although, Todd does have a minor point. I’m partly glad they saw us. If only to know that I’m only yours. And you’re only _mine_.” Damian whispered, kissing Dick’s jaw gently. “They can’t touch you. They can’t have you. I barely accept that they will in their heads. Because in every world, in every universe, I own your heart.” 

Dick’s heart thudded, his hands raking possessively up Damian’s back. He nodded, only focused on the way Damian’s throaty voice filled his ears, how his soft but calloused fingers found their grooves in his back again, how he knew Damian’s jade eyes blazed with passion when he talked like that. 

“Only you, Damian.” Dick said lowly, his baritone sending shivers up Damian’s spine. Damian held him tightly, leaning into Dick’s neck, closing his eyes and putting all of his jittery feelings, all his jealousy, possessiveness, and neediness into his hug, willing Dick to see the depths of his devotion. His heartbeat pounded loudly, long after, and his last conscious thought was _mine_. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> last chapter!! I'll ramble more at the end, but thank you thank you for reading! on with the last chapter...

_Two Months Later_

Damian sipped at his champagne, grunting to the oblivious girl next to him when he felt like he needed to answer. He glanced down at his watch hopefully. _Please be 10:00._ Damian felt all the life in his body sink and spill out his expensive shoes. _Goddamn it. It’s 7:00._ Damian exhaled slowly, feeling agonizingly bored. His time would be better spent in an infinite amount of ways, but there he was. The gala had started only an hour before, but it _felt_ like an eon ago. His unfortunate company mistook his movement for an invitation to get closer, and Damian barely suppressed pinching his nose in irritation. The girl’s hand touched his forearm, gleaming diamond rings pulling his attention.

“- and so then I told him that I was looking for someone far younger and more attractive, like _duh_. Plus, I’m not the heir to the Lynd fortune just to give it away to some poor freeloader. We wealthy families have an obligation to keep it in the _collective_ family, don’t we?” she asked flirtatiously, leaning up to bite at his earlobe. Damian had to ball his fists so as to not chokehold the girl, and he stepped away. _I know more about keeping it in the family than you’d like to know._

“Pray tell. Is that the same Lynd family that protested the plans to build an animal shelter near Miller harbor because it was an eyesore next to the Lynd Hotel?” Damian asked dully. 

“Well, I-...I mean. I didn’t know anyone _actually_ read that article. You don’t actually care about those animals, right?” Damian’s eyes narrowed into slits as the girl looked hopefully up at him. “Besides, that’s not what I was talking about. I was _saying_ that - ” 

“Your appalling personality and insolent sense of entitlement are unsurprising. I have already been courted, but not that that even matters because I honestly can’t fathom being with you a second longer. I am uninterested.” Damian said sharply, ignoring how shocked the girl was. He turned and set out to search for Dick. Damian was _supposed_ to space out how often he hovered around the older man, but he didn’t particularly care what anyone in the damn gala thought. _Well. Except one._

Damian stepped through the crowd, at first lightly brushing past unaware socialites. Emerald eyes darted to each side, and Damian’s irritation grew as he came up with nothing. Giving up such niceties like gentle and polite taps, Damian enjoyed pushing roughly through the crowd. Suddenly, Damian spotted a familiar head of raven hair, and Damian caught his father’s gaze. Glazed dark blue eyes sharpened as soon as they pinned Damian, and he saw a momentary lapse in his father’s mask. High cheekbones ran down to a hard jawline, and Bruce’s fake grin fell into an infinitely small smile. Bruce tilted his head barely to the right, and his mouth twitched when Damian looked excitedly over. As soon as he had looked over, Bruce turned back to enchant his mind-numbing audience. 

Damian pushed with renewed vigor to the right side of the room, hailing the day that all of Gotham’s shitty wealthy people would just die and give their money to charity so he could maybe _enjoy_ a gala for once. Dick’s head of wavy raven hair came into Damian’s sights and he felt his heart pound. Dick was laughing with Jason, Tim smiling in the background, and Damian quieted the small pang of jealousy that threatened to flare up.

Dick was wearing a beautifully tailored suit, blue accents on the collar that brought out his eyes even more. Dick’s hair fanned out to his ears, narrowing sharply into the back of his neck. A well-defined jaw opened up into the sharp planes of Dick’s tanned face, and long eyelashes sat over ice chips. Jason wore a dark red undershirt with a dark black blazer, and he looked happy but wary, like he was ready to bolt at a moment’s notice; this was the first gala he had gone to in a very long time. Tim caught Damian first, cerulean eyes focusing with recognition. He wore his charcoal grey suit, with a black undershirt that had yellow accents along the cuffs. 

As Damian closed the distance, he saw Tim’s face tighten barely and Jason’s smile falter. Damian wouldn’t say that it felt _so_ excellent whenever his presence had that effect, but it was far better than the previous antagonism. After all, whenever he saw anyone else after getting to see Dick, his mood tended to darken as well. Dick turned his head quickly to see Damian. Ice blue eyes looked at him heatedly, drinking in Damian’s figure to finally settle on his face. 

“Damian.” Dick grinned, barely suppressing the desire to lean down and kiss him. Damian felt his lungs stutter, like they always did when Dick looked at him like that. Damian tried to remember what he was going to say, surely he had come with _something_ intelligent to say. 

“I’ve fulfilled my community service out on the floor tonight. They are all unbearable.” Damian managed, repeating the sentence in his head to make sure it came out correctly. Dick laughed, looking out at the milling crowd of Gotham’s richest. Damian stared, catching how Dick’s Adam's apple bobbed when he laughed. The familiar clench of his stomach warned Damian of where his thoughts were careening towards, and he felt his mouth go dry. Dick’s broad shoulders rolled back, and Damian swallowed watching the littlest of things - like the way Dick’s thumb bent to rest on his hips, the way Dick’s close shave looked so smooth Damian’s fingers twitched wanting to caress him, the way Dick stood with an ease that showed off his form so effortlessly...Damian’s mind raced back to just what they had been doing the night before, the way that Dick had fucked him so ruthlessly, had growled the most depraved things to Damian, that the smiley, easygoing side of Dick seemed like a façade. _I would let you ruin me right here._

“We have a new visitor it seems. And it’s looking _right_ at me. God, I think I’m gonna be blind.” Jason said drily. Damian blinked, looking around. _Who? What?_ Tim rolled his eyes, looking half uncomfortable and half exasperated. “And you say that you’re smart.” 

Damian bristled, narrowing his eyes. Dick pointed down subtly, and Damian looked down dumbly at the front of his suit. _Oh. That._ Damian was sporting an impressive boner, thanks to such lovely daydreams just seconds prior. He adjusted his slacks, trying to orient his boner up to tuck under his waistline. _Oh God._ The friction almost made him moan, and even just with Dick’s shoes in his peripheral, the gates to dirty thoughts banged dangerously in his mind. _I’d love it if we could not be horny for just twenty minutes, please...But look at how big his shoes are. Big shoes. Big cock. No! Focus._ Damian wrinkled his nose embarrassedly and he scowled, glaring at Jason and Tim. 

“Tt. Don’t you have to be annoying somewhere _else_?” 

Dick was looking at him with hooded dark eyes, and Damian tried to focus on being cool and collected. _You are not helping me right now._ Tim looked tiredly between the pair, and he pulled Jason’s arm towards the open floor. “Let’s, Jason. I have a new code I wouldn't mind running by you, and I would prefer not to see them fuck each other via eyeballs.” Tim said flatly. Jason looked back desperately, pretending to be dragged off forcibly. “Timothy. What part of that sentence was supposed to be appealing?” 

“Believe it or not, I really don’t care. Anyways, as I was saying…” The pair disappeared into the crowd, Jason’s tall head and Tim’s soft raven head getting smaller and smaller.

Dick stepped closer to Damian, and Damian could tell by the way he had shoved his hands in his pockets that Dick was trying adamantly not to touch him. _That would not be a good press cover._ Emeralds looked up at ice chips, and Damian couldn’t stop the way his heart raced and his neck started to heat. Dick was looking hungrily down at him, biting his lip tightly. _I would do anything for you._ Dick seemed to finally come to a decision, and he looked intensely at the younger man. “Hallways in ten? Let’s find a room.” Dick whispered close to Damian’s ear, and before Damian could blink, Dick was darting towards the closest exit. Damian, with his heart pounding and sweat dampening his dark green undershirt, watched Dick go through the crowd. While Damian had to push clumsily through the masses, Dick swam through them, light feet landing perfectly to push him forward through the slightest opening. Glancing at the large clock in the center wall of the large room, Damian forced himself to wait ten minutes before joining the acrobat. He stood stoically, self-discipline the only thing keeping him, and ignored any interested passerbys. _One one thousand, two one thousand, three one..._

Ten minutes later, Damian rounded the corner of the hallway and noticed one of the farther rooms down the long dark hall was open just a hair. He rushed to get to the door, making sure his light feet didn’t echo at all. Damian pushed the door open slowly, sticking his head in cautiously. The large bedroom had tall windows, shining yellow lights in the distance winking at Damian, the dark sky for once showing the stars of the night. A large hand snaked out from the dark and covered his mouth, and Damian relaxed when he recognized Dick’s heady scent. Dick’s other hand wrapped around Damian’s throat, and jade eyes closed in pleasure. 

“Clothes off, and then get on your hands and knees. In front of the mirror. Do it quickly and maybe I’ll let you keep my come inside.” Dick growled, slamming the door closed with his foot. _Fuck, no time wasted._

Damian’s hands flew to undo his belt and unbutton his pants and dress shirt, and he pushed down slacks quickly before dropping to the ground. Dick crouched, eyes blazing when he saw that his former ward didn’t wear anything under his pants. “Greedy slut. You want me so bad.” Dick hissed, smacking Damian’s ass sharply. 

“I’ve wanted you all night.” Damian shuddered. 

Dick pushed his hands through dark, spiky hair, and tightened his grip painfully. “Then earn it.” Damian opened his mouth wide, pushing his tongue out, and he looked up ardently. Dick slid out of his pants with one hand, and he palmed his cock slowly. Dick pushed the tip slowly to the back of Damian’s throat, reveling in the way Damian’s throat convulsed around him from the intrusion. As soon as Dick pushed all the way in and his balls hit insistently at Damian’s chin, Dick thrusted abruptly. Damian choked loudly, spit spilling out to trail down Dick’s cock, and his nostrils flared with his ragged breathing. Dick set a punishing pace, obsessed with the way that Damian’s dark lips wrapped around him so softly, so _precisely_ , widening each time Dick pulled out and pushed back in. 

“High and mighty until behind closed doors when you have my cock in your mouth, and you’re choking on it like you’re obsessed.” Dick groaned. He couldn’t ever get used to the way that Damian sucked him, the way he sucked so dutifully and so eagerly. Like Dick was doing _him_ a favor, and not the other way around. Damian’s moans filtered through the speedy haze Dick was in, and he basked in hearing the Robin so undeniably wanton. 

Dick pulled out hastily, staring at the way Damian’s throat pulsed. Damian’s face was a deep crimson, jade eyes glistening wetly out under long eyelashes. Sweat beaded at Damian’s hairline, and his mouth went slack. Hooded eyes gazed reverently up at Dick, and Dick felt wild, like his blood was on fire and he couldn’t last one more minute not defiling his boy. 

Dick strode behind Damian, pushing his back down and pulling his ass up. Damian looked out of the window, catching the way their dark reflection looked very damning as to what they were doing. The soft warm light of the room illuminated their forms against the dark window, and Damian looked excitedly at the scene in front of him - the show he would get to see. Damian’s leaking dick dragged along the carpet, and Dick drank in the animalistic vision before him. To have Damian, in peak physical form, bent so lewdly looked unnatural and entirely too natural at the same time. Damian clenched his hole, and Dick started at the black tip that poked out. Scorching ice eyes flashed to meet Damian’s jade eyes in the mirror in front of Damian. “I didn’t know you prepped yourself already.” Dick stated unintelligently. 

Damian rolled his hips forward, cock moving against the carpet needily. “I use a plug now any night I think we can possibly be alone. Or if you came in me the night before. In this case, it’s all of the above.” Damian said huskily. Dick looked like he was going to fracture, with how tight he clenched his jaw. Dick pushed forward, kissing up Damian’s back fervently. 

“You’re going to kill me, little prince. Open up.” Tanned fingers pulled out the black plug roughly, and Damian keened. Dick lined up his cock, mesmerized by the way it always just looked like it _wouldn't fit_ and how that just excited Dick even more. Because he knew, he _knew,_ how tight Damian was, how it felt to have his hot walls clenching around him, sucking him back greedily. 

Dick thrust when Damian’s hole gaped, and Dick saw all the air leave Damian’s body. Dick held onto narrow hips, hands finding familiar spots that were bruised from his hands last time, and Dick looked up to watch him fuck Damian in the window. Dick could see the tip of Damian’s cock bob jerkily, precome coating the carpet, and Damian’s biceps straining to keep his shoulders down and ass high. This position was their favorite - Damian’s head pressed against the floor and narrow hips high in the air for Dick to use him in the most degrading way possible. Dick thrusted deeper, hitting Damian in a way that had him cry out. _That’s right._ Dick snuck a hand to hold Damian’s jaw up, forcing him to look at the vision in front of him. 

“Taking me like some dog. Like some easy, sloppy cumdump. I’ve made you _weak_ , I’ve made you a gaping, slutty mess for me. And you _love it._ ” Dick taunted nastily. Damian’s eyes flashed, and he looked up at Dick challengingly, almost as if he was saying _obviously_ . He turned back to the window, watching how Dick’s form seemed to to engulf him. Large muscles strained under his flawless suit, blazer waving with his brutal pace. But his _eyes_ burned under sweaty black strands of hair, and his mouth twisted back into a snarl. Damian felt his stomach constrict, and suddenly everything felt so sensitive he knew he wasn’t going to last long. If anyone else had even thought about using such language to him, Damian would have cause to gut them. But Dick _using_ him, like he was completely in Dick’s control to do with how we wished, calling him such derogatory terms so possessively, went straight to Damian’s cock every single time. 

“I should have just taken you out in the middle of the gala. Fucked you in front of all of them like some common whore, let them see how soft your underbelly is, how much I _own_ you. I bet you’d like that, darling.” 

Damian _did_ like that, but then again, he would have agreed to anything that Dick asked of him in that moment. The scene was so easy to picture in his mind, but _he_ felt powerful for getting to prove to so many people that Dick was only his. _Mine._

“But what I’d really like, is them to know that this Batman fucks his Robin, fucks him till he’s screaming and raw. Could’ve fucked you the very second you put on that damn uniform, could've had you splayed out all pretty and begging for me, and you would _love it_.” 

Damian gasped, his eyes snapping open, finding Dick’s gaze in the reflection. “ _Yes. Yes_ , _I’m your Robin_.” Damian cried out loudly. _I would’ve taken your cock, no prep, let you shove it in and use me against anything, let you dump your seed in me, let you use me again and again, anytime you wanted._ Damian’s thoughts traveled to the way Dick looked in the cowl, his looming form dark and foreboding, exuding power and dominance. 

Dick slid out, enjoying the way Damian looked like he was about to scream, his face twisting desperately with the loss. Dick put his cock on Damian’s ass, obsessed with the way Damian’s hole spasmed without his cock. 

“I would’ve done anything, if I knew how tight your little ass was. Fuck, I’ve dreamed about _forcing_ you to take my cock, making you take it, because _I wanted it._ Not for you, but just for _me_ . Because you’re _my Robin_. And you’re just my little hole, my little glorified hole. I could’ve forced you _anytime_ then. I wanna hear you scream, _Robin_.” Dick said huskily, wild eyes watching the way Damian choked hearing Dick’s admission. 

“Fuck, I, please, Dick. _Use_ me, just make me take it,” Damian said hoarsely, bowing his head on the carpet, his ass clenching needily. Dick backed up, his dress shoes bracketing Damian’s legs, and he leaned forward to spit in Damian’s gaping hole, watching it sink deep inside. Dick’s hands found Damian’s ass, spreading it wide, painfully, for him to sink deep in, again and again, hearing Damian scream into his arm as Dick hit his spot repeatedly. 

“ _Good boy, Robin. Take my cock._ ” Dick’s voice deepened, his voice gritty and dark like when he was Batman, and Damian’s eyes rolled back and he screamed out, his cock spurting immediately, sending his come out to coat his abs and catch on the window. Dick pounded into Damian, his measured thrusts turning wild, and he growled out, imagining he was wearing the cowl and Damian was wearing his Robin uniform in the reflection. One large hand slid down to Damian’s weakly spurting cock, and he jerked Damian fast, wanting Damian to come again before he finished. Dick bit into Damian’s shoulder, needing to hold up Damian’s limp body, as he fucked desperately into him, wanting to corrupt his little Robin, wanting to _ruin_ him. When he should protect him, when he should want nothing to do with this boy who was over ten years younger, who worshipped him since he was ten, who was his ward, partner, and brother, but that made it _better_ , it made it that much sweeter, to take and defile this forbidden fruit that had only begged to be defiled by him, to lay claim to what was _his_. 

Damian moaned weakly, barely conscious, and started rolling his hips back to meet Dick’s wild thrusts. Dick continued to jerk him, roughly pulling on the head of his slimmer cock, savoring how Damian whined in protest but made no move to stop him. He slanted his hips deeper, seeing Damian’s head snap with the new angle. The moment slowed, and Dick watched as Damian’s face tightened to cry out again, and Dick’s name echoed in the room desperately. Damian’s stomach contracted again, his cock twitching in Dick’s hand, and he came but nothing shot out, his spent cock pulsing feebly. Dick groaned, holding tightly to Damian’s hips, trying to carve himself in deeper and deeper, wanting to leave his come so far inside it wouldn’t ever leave. 

“ _Damian_.” Dick grunted while he came, hips stuttering, and Damian keened appreciatively, his hole clenching to milk Dick’s throbbing cock. He kept thrusting weakly, iron grip on Damian’s hips unrelenting. Damian sighed, the feeling of Dick’s cock dragging in him, feeling the slosh of his seed, was both obscene and so natural. Dick’s blazer dragged against Damian’s naked back, and Damian shivered, completely overwhelmed. 

Dick released his iron grip, leaning his hands up to prop him up against the window, mesmerized by the colorful lights gleaming on Damian’s sweaty body. His cock slid out with a wet pop, his come spilling out to drip down Damian’s balls. Dick quickly grabbed the discarded plug, slowly angling it to push as much of his come back into Damian, before he slotted it back in, sealing his come inside. Damian moaned, arching his back up to look back at Dick with heated eyes. 

“Can’t be wasteful, can we?” Dick rasped. He leaned forward, kissing the base of Damian’s spine, hands roaming to touch all over Damian’s warm body. 

“No, we can’t have that.” Damian agreed lowly, his throaty timbre returning. Dick kissed him greedily, hands stilling at his chest. He smiled, pushing off to stand up. Damian watched him tuck his spent cock back in immaculate slacks, and he fixed his cuffs and collar carefully. Damian rolled his neck, feeling _sore_ , but more alive than he had been all day. He crouched, watching his naked reflection next to Dick’s in the mirror, his dark flushed skin and hanging cock, looking thoroughly fucked, while Dick looked like he just stepped off a GQ fashion shoot. This powerful man, who hung the moon and the stars and could fly in between them, this beautiful acrobat that carried his heart so easily. Whose heart _he_ carried, and when, really, could he ever get used to saying that? It felt _right_ , to feel so tethered only to him, so wholly owned, that it made Damian smirk smugly. 

“What are you smirking about, baby bat? Other than getting properly fucked.” Dick grinned, blue eyes looking warm. 

“Just thinking. About you. About how your cock is mine. How your heart is mine. How your everything is mine.” Damian smiled dangerously, and despite being on his knees, naked, full of Dick’s come, he looked like he was the one who was truly powerful. Dick swallowed, captivated by the passion in Damian’s eyes that flaunted the most fervent devotion Dick knew he could ever find. 

“In every life. But you know that already.” Dick rasped, his hands dropping. Damian rose elegantly, like a cat, and he walked closer to Dick, dark eyelashes over sultry eyes. “I do, beloved. But I’ll never get used to it, not ever. I’ll chase you forever.” 

Damian stretched up, kissing Dick under his jaw, before he turned to collect his clothing. He put on dark boxers, black slacks, buttoned up his dark green undershirt, and looked for his blazer. His hips ached every time he moved, the bruises blooming quickly, and his ass felt raw. _Perfect._ Dick watched him, handing him the blazer he had ripped off of Damian in his frenzy. 

“Now. What say you, beautiful boy of mine, we go back to that damn gala, find ourselves some fine champagne and we make our social rounds _together_? I don’t want to let you out of my sight.” Dick offered, eyebrows arched up invitingly. Damian fake scoffed, his bored face sliding back on, the smallest hint of a smile that only Dick could bring out. 

“And spend _more_ time watching those dimwits ogle you in front of me, while I have to play little brother? _While your come is in me?_ ”

“How about this. Tonight, I bargain with your dad to get the Batmobile for our patrol. Do you see where this is heading? You, me, the _Batmobile_ , maybe you did something wrong, and a punishment is in order. We can bring what I just talked about to _life._ I can see it already, darling.” Dick said grinning, hands splayed out theatrically. “But you have to be good. I _distinctly_ remember a recent gala where you were _not_ good and you ran off before I could catch you.” Dick finished, winking. 

“Ah, beloved. By that logic, I should just run off to patrol now, because at said gala, the very next day, I got you to finally see that you really were just completely in love with me. So, really -” Damian started cockily, puffing out his chest. 

“Okay, no. We are going to the gala, _then_ we are going on patrol where I will fuck you in the Batmobile, _in the appropriate attire_ , and then I’ll stay here in Gotham tonight. B will absolutely have our asses if we ditch him again. We really should not have left at _all_ , but you’re far too pretty, looking like that in that damn suit. I have no self control around you, little prince.” Dick teased, leaning towards the door. 

“Tt. I suppose we can do that. But I’m not smiling at braindead snobs.” Damian sniffed, crossing his arms. He really _really_ did not want to go back, and having Dick never sated him - it always made him hungry for more. But he supposed it would look poorly on their parts if they left so early, and maybe he could barely drag his body through the night if he got to revolve around Dick. 

“I would know you were an alien if you did, love. After you.” 

Damian strode forward, one last glance at his come dried on the window, and he knew he should clean it up, but he didn’t want to, didn’t want to ever get rid of more proof of _them_ . He turned the door knob, carefully slipping out while Dick slunk out with light feet, his hand coming to rest on the small of Damian’s back. The hallway was dark, the light of the gala just down the hall, and Damian felt a flare of anger that he had to share Dick with the rest of the world again. He checked the rest of the hall, before quickly spinning around and slamming Dick’s head down in a burning kiss. The taste of Dick post-sex, with his sweat, hot breath, and everything _Dick_ , Damian almost moaned. He pulled back barely, emeralds looking up intensely into dazed blue eyes. 

Just as quick as he pulled Dick down, he spun around, striding out towards the light, fixing his cuffs and broadening his shoulders, putting on his mask for the rest of the world. Dick stood, stunned, and watched Damian surreptitiously blow him a kiss, beckoning him over. Damian’s genuine smile broke through his arrogant smirk, and Dick hurried over to join him, barely suppressing the urge to drag him back in that damn room. 

The gala spread out before them, hundreds of socialites milling about. The grand chandelier hung over the center, warm white lights bathing the room in a gorgeous glow. The pair stood tall, the dark vigilantes finally returning to the mix, and some eyes brightened with recognition, already heading over to bask in the arresting presence of the Wayne heirs. 

“You and me against the world, little prince.” Dick said warmly, bumping Damian’s shoulder. 

“Anything else would be unthinkable, beloved.” Damian turned, showing one of his rare toothy smiles, and Dick didn’t even hear the gasps and comments of surprise from the incoming socialites - _the_ Damian Wayne never smiled like that, not _ever_. 

_Well, perhaps not. But I do when I’m with you._ Damian felt his heart fill as Dick beamed back, and he felt like his chest was gonna explode, his heart pounding, his blood was singing, every fiber of his being pulling closer to the older man. Which was nothing new - Damian had felt that for _years_ , since he was ten. Knew he was going to feel that until he took his last breath. Knew that he had found his life’s great happiness in loving and being loved by Richard Grayson, and that he wouldn’t - _couldn’t_ ever let it go. It truly was as simple as that. 

_Only when I’m with you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and that's the end! it's pretty insane to be done with this story honestly. this is my first hand ever at writing fanfic, and it's been incredible. I've learned so much about what does and doesn't work and how a story can truly just expand without you realizing. I actually was intending to have the story end after dick and damian confess, but then it felt like I was leaving Bruce and the other batboys out hanging, and it was fun to write them tell the family. it's much easier for me to write damian, mostly because some of my favorite stories are at his perspective and the pining he does is just so intense, so real, it just /hurts/. and dick being darker than a lot of people give him credit for has been really cool to play with, since I think loving damian is very easy and so difficult at the same time, and at least at first, dick hates that. 
> 
> There are definitely some times it's not hard to tell I'm writing for the first time, so for that I apologize, but I hope I get better over time! I have a lot of ideas and delicious tropes bouncing in my head, and I want to work on those soon. this has been an amazing journey to go on, and it only got here because of all your feedback and support. I swear, I never knew how important a comment is on a fic and how it can make an author's day! I'm definitely going to try writing more comments myself, because truly, this story would not have gone this far if I didn't get the lovely chance of reading your beautiful comments and ideas! so truly, thank you all so much for reading and leaving any comment, but most of all just caring - it means a lot. 
> 
> So, until next time! If you ever want to see my art/ideas/or even better, talk ideas for fics with me, I'd love to talk to you! you can find me on [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/disgruntledwing) or [ twitter](https://twitter.com/disgruntledwing) take care! <3


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